May You Never Forget and Always Remember

Here I am after almost a year of not writing... anything...

This one is for me.

And no one else.

Dear Nia,

You've done well. You've done good. Look at how far you have come. No, this is not where you want to be, who you want to be, who you want to be with, BUT you made it this far.

I am proud of you Nia, for never giving up on yourself. All you've ever really had is you. And look at you now. Confused, but living. Continuing to seek, learn, experience, inspire... But Nia, don't forget to breathe when you get overwhelmed. Sometimes you forget to breathe. Don't forget to blink. Don't forget to sink your toes into the earth. Meditate and do yoga. Stretch out your body, in the ways you love too. Come back to YOUR center, for you. No one else.

This is for me.

No one else.

Nia,

Continue to breathe. Continue to crush. Continue to love. Continue to daydream about the day when you finally feel complete. Content in the life you created for yourself. Content with and without those around you. When you finally feeling like you're growing, grow some more. When you finally feel whole again. When you find interesting people that you don't get bored of, or settle for because you are lonely. Keep searching for yourself amongst the many versions of you. When your back is against the wall, and you are trapped from all sides, please don't forget who you are. Who you have become. What you have become. All the fight that is still inside you. You have built this life for yourself on your two feet alone. No guidance, no support, just you with your heart on your sleeves and your chest always leading the way. And may it never stop. May you never stop building, growing, learning, experiencing, and motivating others and yourself. Being your own cheerleader is hard, but if you don't do it for you, then who will?

Nia,

Promise me you will continue to search. Always search for the missing parts of you. The parts that are trapped somewhere, and we don't know where to find them. The parts of you that remain impossible to feel and hold and touch, but you know they are out there, somewhere. One day, I pray it isn't a daydream, you will hold it. You will hold onto these missing pieces of yourself that you will choke your own self in order to feel it always. May your love remain true. May your soulmates keep coming in and out of your life, teaching you lessons, teaching you how important you really are, and how you should never. settle. for less. May you always hear the sound of your own heartbeat when you lay down to rest at night, instead of the snoring of a person who never deserved your love anyways...your existence in the first place.

Nia,

Do not choke on the things you feel you lack and haven't accomplished yet. This life is something to always celebrate. God has brought us this far so we cannot stop now, we can never stop, even if we spend our whole lives moving from place to place because we don't fit in anywhere. Even if we never find a love so pure and intriguing we get lost in it forever. May you never forget, Nia, that you are here. YOU are here. Right now, in every moment, in every breath, amongst every challenge, every evil thing that has tried to take you out. Nia, you still have breath in your lungs. You still have that fire that not many have in them, and never will.

May you never forget that this is your life. And a life worth living.

To: Nia

From: Nia

I'll love you forever.