Making A Life's Decision When In A Place Of Lack.

Growing up, you're given everything you want as a child from teddy bears to candies, to money for all you want. So basically, you can say life is all rosy or so it looks.

Then one day you suddenly stop getting everything you want, maybe because of forced change in lifestyle as a result of so unforseen economic factors. This leads to your inability to you live up to that standard any more.

So here is the big question? if you're unable to keep up with the lifestyle and you know you have to work just about any job to keep fending for yourself and in most cases you have to resort to menial jobs.

Because of the standard of living you're already accustomed to, you feel within you that you cannot stoop so low, simply because you can't be caught doing some kind of jobs, what do you do at that point?

We've all been there, or well, a lot of us have been there. For those who haven't, maybe you might not be able to relate but I can tell you for a fact that when you find yourself in a situation like this, you'll usually have people say; "just do this job, just do that job, so you you can put food on your table and blah blah blah"

The truth is, it's not that easy to dabble into just any job, especially if you're accustomed to a certain standard of living, a certain lifestyle.

When life turns around, a lot of times we find it difficult to go below that standard. That's why you see some ladies resort to prostitution. While some guys resort to drug dealings, stealing and other vices.

If you're to councel someone in this situation, the advice here is not going to be you saying, "just do anything to put food on your table", because, honestly, it's easier said than done. A lot of times, for those who cannot afford to go down the route of prostitution, drug, and all those other vices, that's where depression sets in.

Depression when not properly handled well could lead to sucidal thoughts. That's why sometimes you hear that this person committed suicide or things like that.

I'm writing this to actually to create awareness and to let you know that depression is real. For anyone who is going through a situation like this, I hope and pray you come out successfully.

Those who have successfully dealt with it will tell you that it wasn't because they realised they had to do this kind of job or that kind of job as people will easily throw in their opinion, but it took a conscious decision to actually pull away from how life probably would make them want to believe it should be, to facing reality of life and knowing that this is real life sh!t.

If I were to councel a girl or a boy going through a situation like this, after listening to their narrative or their story, I think the best approach is first of all letting them know you understand where they're coming from and how difficult it is for them to just adapt into their new reality.

Acknowledge their fear of being laughed at amongst many other.

Secondly find out the skills they are good at or what they are willing to learn and how doing this things could actually propel them to be a better version of themselves rather than asking them to take up a job that they are not okay doing.

One time I was in a sunking place, I left a job because I thought my plan of studying abroad was going to all work out and my life was going to go as I planned. But you know life, sometimes it surprises us. Unfortunately, upon leaving my job, I didn't have a contingency plan.

I had people telling me, "just take up any job", forget your college degree. I said to myself I'm not going to do that, not because I'm too proud (I knew at that point everyone is going to misinterpret it as pride but I'm not going to do that).

Ah man, having a university degree, a bachelor's degree and then taking up a job for maybe high school leaver? That's really appauling I must confess. I said to myself that I wasn't going to do this. You may not agree with me, but a lot of times, this has a huge impact on one's self-esteem.

I could have gone into depression but for very supportive family and close friends.

The only thing is that at some point I realised that I can't keep depending on family, I have to do what I have to do and I looked out for online jobs to see what I can possibly do. 

I saw lots of opportunities, then I looked inwards. What are the skills I have? I realised I love writing, I realise I love creating contents, digital contents.



And then I pursued that route, I pursue that dream. It's probably different from how I thought my life was going to play out, but it's entirely me not staying or accepting what people were asking me to settle for.

The difference is that I took control of the situation but for people who don't know how to, people who are easily thrown into depression, how do you help these people rather than just throwing what you think or forcing an opinion you feel is right for all, not considering the fact that everyone is different.

Do you actually try to figure out where they are coming from because where we're coming from, a lot of times determines how we handle situations and sometimes they define the next step we take when we're faced with a certain situation.

So when next you see someone who is on this path, just pause for a while before you carry out your judgement on them as to why they are refusing to take up some jobs you feel they should.