I have so many reasons to be happy and care free but a mistake I made in my teenage days has me feeling self-doubt sometimes. I won't get into what it was but I'm still paying for it to this day.
You know when you're young and sometimes you just do stuff to fit in when you know before doing it that it's wrong. I mean, yeah I had my reasons but then I won't lie, I was easily influenced. I just wanted to be cool and have friends because I already felt bad about myself. Here I was, 18 or 19 and so skinny. I didn't like myself and then there were the people that reminded me of my weight everyday, like I didn't already know. They didn't know how bad that made me feel. Today, I am 32 years old and still skinny. I don't look like a grown woman. I look like a little teenage girl who still haven't developed all the way. So I wanted to fit in, but went the wrong way about it.
So because of my bad choices I'm still paying for it today. I can't find a decent job, even though I have my Bachelor's degree. I sometimes get talked down upon or feel like I do and I have so many issues within myself. Lately, I've decided to stop beating myself up about the past and looking towards my future. I have a beautiful family and they support me 100 percent. I'm starting to like me for me and just coming to the agreement with myself that I'm unique and that it don't matter if I don't look like the average girl with hips and breast and butt. I'm beautiful in my own way and that's all that matters.
Sometimes we get so caught up in what the world say we should look like that it makes us feel bad about ourselves. We get depressed and start to have negative thoughts and that's not good. People will always try to judge you but we don't need their approval. Never let someone's interpretation of who you supposed to be define who you really are.
We have to learn to love ourselves. We have to work on being one with the person we wake up every day and see through the mirror. Your relationship with yourself is the most defining factor in shaping the kind of life you live. Self-love isn’t always easy. I know that sometimes we are our own biggest critics. It’s when we spend more time hating ourselves than we do loving ourselves that we adopt a more negative disposition of the world. Do you take care of your body, your mind, and your needs?
Here are some of the ways you could help with loving yourself:
- Sleeping properly
- Eating healthy
- Giving yourself time and space to understand your spirituality
- Exercising regularly
- Avoiding vices and toxic influences
- Reflecting and meditating
Loving yourself is more than just a state of mind—it’s also a series of actions and habits that you embed into your everyday life. Allow yourself to be honest with who you are. Forgive yourself for your past deeds, those things you are ashamed of. Do you love yourself fully? Learning to accept your flaws and all is one thing but you also have to love your personality, your mistakes, and your thoughts. Discover your life story from the beginning. Start from your childhood all the way to the person you are now to properly learn you, accept you, and love you for you.