Does it always feel like you are fighting a battle in your head? Does it feel like you are failing? Does it feel like the devil is winning? Does it make you want to throw in the towel and calling it quits? Do you want to end it all sometimes because life is just too much?
Yeah, me too, I get like that every now and then, often to be honest, but I don’t. I keep going because I know that people need me and want me to make it out of this crazy thing called life, I know they think I can make it out on top even when I don’t think I can. When I think I am failing at everything, they think I am handling it great, they think that because I often don’t let them believe otherwise, because they don’t need to think otherwise. When I need to vent, I write, I write it all out because I know they will read it one day or another, even if that day is the day I die.
They don’t know how many times I have wanted to end it all they don’t know all the times that life has became too much for me to handle because I don’t want them to worry about me. I have a few friends I talk to about all my life problems, that I don’t write about, but I often just write about it because I want to be able to help others with my story.
I don’t just write about my life to be honest; I write about everything; I write about my work too. I don’t really write about many different things, but I am now trying out a few different things. I am trying new things so all different kinds of people can enjoy my writing too.
I know I am far from the best writer, but I could be worse at it. If you would have asked me four years ago if I would see myself writing in the future, I would have laughed at you and called you crazy, because I honestly hated writing, I didn’t see it as something that could help me, or others. Now I see that it can, I hear how great my writing is but not many people see that I write from my heart, it is truly how I am feeling. I say they don’t see it because they think it is just how I am feeling at certain times, but it is how I feel most of the time, and I just haven’t had the time to put it into words, because I am so focused on something else, or I just don’t know how I am feeling sometimes.
I write all that I do to help others, not myself, I don’t do it for the money, because I make nothing off what I write. I write to help others understand that even when life is a living hell they can keep going, they can push threw their life problems and still feel like they are on top of the mountain. Life is not easy, and it isn’t supposed to be easy. But however, you look at your life today will decide what your future looks like. If you keep feeling sorry for yourself then you will always feel like your life is terrible, if you look passed all the bad and see the things that are going good in your life then you will think you are living the best life ever. You can feel sorry for yourself for a couple of days but don’t sit and feel sorry for yourself for too long, or you will expect the world to stop and feel sorry for you when the world will keep going round and no one will feel sorry for you.
You don’t deserve the world, you just deserve happiness, and happiness is found within yourself. It starts with selfcare and selflove.