Learning to Write to Myself and Finding my Passions
Journaling as a form of self-care and development.
Today I'm going to be talking about how to write. I want to discuss writing as a form of self-care and self love. I want to use words to create pieces of writing to inspire others and help myself express my ideas, thoughts and opinions.
I've been writing to myself ever since I was able to. As a lover of diaries, I chronicled every waking moment in between the pages of butterfly notebooks with silver locks. This started when I was very young and felt my feelings were best expressed through scribbles, pictures and miniature poems. These often contained borrowed lyrics from overly deep and frankly depressing songs I had come across.
The idea of lyrics has always deeply interested me as a form of self-induced therapy. I always wondered if the singers and songwriters of this generation poured their real feelings into music, or if it was simply what the producers told them to write.
I got older. I transferred my notes into a huge diary covered in purple butterflies. I took my own words and others, then created pages upon pages of strange ramblings. I wrote about people at school, my friends and family, as well as all the strange ideas that occupy the mind of a teenage girl. Often, I would pour my heart out in moments of sadness, using the pages of the notebook as a personal therapist. Reading back on theses pages is still quite entertaining to this day, it never ceases to amaze me just how dramatic the life of a teenager is.
I grew up. I lost the time I seemed to have. I chase the empty afternoons spent cuddling up with a notebook and some iPod music. Life moves so fast these days. I barely feel like I have time to stop and smell the coffee. Again, I miss when I drank coffee for taste rather than to shake off a hangover.
I decided I wanted to reinvent myself.
When an individual attends University, as I have, it is very easy to lose interest in the few things in life that create passion. I am passionate about art, writing, makeup, photography, reading and so much more. I want to embrace the things I used to love so much. I often feel like being taught something removes the aspect of enjoyment. I haven't enjoyed artistic pursuits since I completed a post-college course during which the teacher left me in tears after insisting I try sculpture. Being aggressively analysed and taught how to do something is the end of passion. My creativity was suffocated and stifled by being taught.
I want to write and draw for passion, not because it has to be perfect and meet a set of criteria. Breaking away from analytical thoughts after education is the key to creating media that truly means something. I feel much more connected to my work when I know it is truly what I want to do, not want I want a lecturer to see.
Does this discredit formal teaching? Of course not. I just feel every creative needs a time to let go. To not care. To feel passionate and aggressively so.
I want to do what I am passionate about. I started writing again. I want to write everything down.
Now, I write to myself in a journal titled the Quiet and Mindful notebook by author P.R Chase. This journal is fantastic for organising my thoughts with helpful writing prompts and beautiful illustrations. I've found this an invaluable tool for creating a clear headspace and expressing myself through writing and poetry as well as art.
I often write about spaces and places that I visualise. I love to imagine a calm space where I can really process my feelings through poetry.
I need my own vision that hasn't been taught to me.