How to Love Your Life at Every Age

When I was twenty-seven, a wave of fear filled my life.

As I looked to the future, what I saw was the beginning of the end. Soon, everything will be down.

Why is there sorrow and darkness? I was approaching thirty!

Like many young people in their twenties, I took "The Big 3-0" as the end of the team.

I could be uncool (or maybe more accurately, cooler than I ever was). I am afraid of turning to my parents.

One day, I was expressing my concern to an older friend (she was in her thirties).

Kissing his arm, he looked at me with one of those words-oh-poor-clueless-thing, and said, “Your thirties will hit your twenties down! You will have your act together, you will earn a lot of money, but you will be young enough to do all the things you want to do. ”

He was right, of course.

As soon as I turned 30, I met a partner with whom I shared my life for the next twelve years. My career began, I bought a house, and I was able to pay for vacations. Most importantly, I gained some maturity and focused on my life.

For thirty years I was terrified. They did, in fact, slap my twenty hands on the ground.

Since then, I have never been afraid of the approach of a “historic” birthday — any birthday. Each passing year, and each phase of life, brings its own joy and its opportunities to grow and adapt.

Forty years brought more opportunities for growth and adaptability. I have been through divorce and many dating misadventures, my career moved in new ways, and I met my current husband. Even though (or maybe because of it) all the change, adaptability and growth, my forties were awesome.

We are often reminded that we have to live in the present, and that we should not worry about the future or hold regrets from yesterday.

That is good advice, but I also believe that we need to keep focused on the future.

To me, this is not an issue. We can live to the full now and plan for the future. Life today is only about putting yourself in danger of wandering aimlessly.

Our dreams, our hopes, and our goals keep us growing and moving forward. We are very happy when we are on our journey to a place that we thought and enjoyed.

I am now fifty-seven years old and am starting early retirement. I've had challenges and fixes, but that's okay. So far, my fifty are scary.

I have decided that it is time to retire the term "retirement." I prefer to think of my remaining decades as my “Renaissance” - a time of redefining, rebuilding, and rebuilding.

You can start your own private Renaissance at any time in your life.

It doesn't matter if your horizon is 30, 40, 50, or retire, here are some steps you can take to bring purpose and happiness to your life today, while setting the stage for hope tomorrow:

1. Pursue things that you do not think you have time for.

Write down the things that make your heart truly sing. Enter tasks you don't have time for now. Think of the jobs that you have acquired while growing up.

You should find that one or two of these things will meet you more than anything else. Try to find at least an hour or two a week to contribute to your love.

I love jazz and I play my trombone. Most of my adult life, I played on a team that trains one night a week. Sometimes I was so busy I didn't have time to play anymore, but at least I played once a week.

Now, I have time to play in many ensembles and practice them as often as possible. If I had stopped playing my trombone completely for the rest of my career, it would have been much harder for me to take it again. And I would deprive myself of happiness all those years.

Describe your estate. What do you want to leave behind?

What do you want to be remembered for? How do you want to make a lasting contribution to the world? It could be a book, a work of art, music, a service organization that you start or donate your time and talent to, or perhaps the impact you have on the lives of others through training, counseling, or leadership.

Even if an hour or two is the only time you can give your true love today, you will still be making a difference, and you will be setting yourself up for further fulfillment in your years to come.

3. Decide where you really want to live, and make arrangements to move there.

Where would you stay if you didn't care where your work was found? Write down the possibilities that you enjoy most.

Many people wait until they retire to relocate to where they really want to live. Maybe it doesn’t work to move now, especially if you love your job but not where you live. Can you shape your future to live where you live?

When I was in my late teens, I decided I had enough cold winter, traffic jams, and high cost of living in Washington, D.C., so I decided to move to Arizona.

It was the wisest step I ever could take. I’m glad I didn’t wait twenty years to deliver the warmth and sunshine I really enjoy now.

4. Visiting places you have always wanted to visit.

While trying to live my life without regrets, I wish I had gone a long way in twenty-three years. Now I know that exploring new countries and cultures is one of the richest and most memorable experiences you can have.

In addition to observing the marvelous beauty of our planet, seeing how other people live will enhance your understanding of humanity and broaden your view of the world.

And it will increase your range of possibilities for where you would like to live.

5. Reexamine your views on aging.

When you think of reaching your milestone birthday, how do you feel?