Existential Crisis

You are always paying a cost for having consciousness. The price is contemplation. This consciousness allows every individual to find meaning, purpose, and value in life. But what if you feel stuck in a moment where you are questioning your life's meaning and purpose. You are left stranded feeling what is the meaning of this all?

When such feelings overtake you, then you are experiencing an existential crisis.

I had one such experience last year. It took me more than three months to be entirely out of it. In my heart, I want to be a writer, but I am also doing a Master's in Data Science. Earlier during my bachelor studies, I enjoyed programming immensely, but gradually, writing started to take precedence over programming over time. Writing makes me feel that I am living my life, whereas programming doesn't, at least not anymore.

I experienced my existential crisis in July 2020 because I hadn't written a single word since March 2020. Pandemic had struck, and things were chaotic in the university. I didn't write anything because of the increased university workload.

Not writing created unfulfillment and dissatisfaction in my life which was my reason for an existential crisis.

There can be other reasons for existential crisis that I will discuss further.

What causes an existential crisis?

As the term says, there has to be some crisis in your life to make you feel that way. They include:

Death of a loved one

• You recently lost someone very dear to you, like a parent, a spouse/partner, a friend, or a very close cousin. You are unable to imagine your life without them. You feel without them; there is no point in doing anything in life.

Sudden change in circumstances

• You lost a job where you were working your ass off. You failed in a venture that you were undertaking. Because of something similar, you are either forced to relocate or live uncertainly. This can make you feel what the point of working so hard when it matters to nothing is.

Unfulfillment or dissatisfaction in life

• This one stems from the fact that you are doing things that you don't enjoy doing. You are either doing them because of pressure, responsibilities, making others happy, financial burdens, etc. 
• My existential crisis fell into this category. I moved from India to Germany to avoid the relentless and unappreciative work culture of India. I thought if I study for a few years, I will have relatively more time to devote to my writing. Alas, it turned out to be untrue because of a lot of uncontrollable circumstances.

Knowing the causes of existential crisis is necessary. Still, you also need to look out for signs to recognize if you have such an experience before finding the root cause of the underlying feelings and emotions.

The Signs to look for

There is no universal list for signs to recognize an existential crisis, but the following are pretty comprehensive.

Lack of motivation

1. Do you feel unmotivated towards doing anything? 

2. Do you feel like not going to work or university? 

3. Do you feel like not talking to anyone? 

4. Do you feel like not working towards your hobbies and interests?

If you said yes to one of the above questions or a similar question, then there is a chance that you might be experiencing an existential crisis unless you are just lazy.

Depression / Suicidal Thoughts

1. Do you not feel like getting up in the morning? 

2. Do you tired all the time not willing to do daily survival chores such as eating?

3. Do you gravitate towards negative emotions throughout the entirety of your day?

4. Do you feel that you are losing the will to live?

If you said yes to any of the above questions, especially the last one, my advice is to seek professional help as soon as possible. If you can't, try talking to one of your close friends about these emotions and ask them to help you get professional help.

Questioning everything

1. Are you asking a lot of unusual questions to yourself these days?

2. Do you ask yourself why you are doing this job? Or do you ask yourself why you are studying?

3. Do you ask yourself what is the point of everything if you are going to die one day?

4. Do you ask yourself the purpose of life if it all surmounts this misery?

If you said yes to one of the above questions or a similar question, then there is a chance that you might be experiencing an existential crisis.

Regret over past choices/decisions

1. Do you keep dwelling over a mistake you made in the past?

2. Do you keep thinking of people you lost in the past?

3. Do you keep thinking about your past decisions that led you to your present?

If you said yes to one of the above questions or a similar question, then there is a chance that you might be experiencing an existential crisis.

I think the above signs cover a lot of ground, but you might be thinking, "Okay! I know the signs and causes of an existential crisis but do you have any advice or tips on how to handle it?"

If you are thinking that, then kudos to you. Pat yourself on the back (This was not sarcasm rather a genuine appreciation of the fact that your mental faculties are working). This is the exact thing I am going to discuss further.

6 Ways to overcome an existential crisis

It won't be easy, but the following ways you can work through and overcome an existential crisis.

Way #1 - Change in Mindset / Adjustment of viewpoint

It is crucial that what is the mindset and the lens through which you are looking at this whole experience. Rather than thinking of this experience as a crisis, look at it as an opportunity to work towards making changes that will lead you to your happiness. 

I changed my mindset by looking at my university workload to be a matter of a couple of weeks. I made myself understand that the exams will be over in two weeks. Post exams, I can write as much as I can. I did. I finished the first draft of my book by writing more than 50,000 words in a little more than two months.

Way #2 - Maintain a gratitude journal

Start keeping a gratitude journal where you mention the things you are thankful for and add meaning to your life. By writing things that give you joy and purpose in life, you can figure out what you want to change. I started maintaining one, and it also consisted of things that provide me self-affirmation.

Way #3 - Connect with people

This sounds like an obvious one, but you face an existential crisis when you feel disconnected from the closed ones and the world. Reconnecting with your friends and family can bring stability to your thoughts. Reach out to people who might have had similar experiences. If these feelings last for an extended period, then seek professional help. 

I talked to a couple of my friends when I was experiencing an existential crisis. Until talking to them, I hadn't figured out the reason as to why I was feeling this way? One of them pointed out that it might be because I haven't written anything in a long time.

Way #4 - Practice mindfulness

The best ways to practice mindfulness are to meditate and spending time alone with your thoughts. Meditation will help you to acknowledge your thoughts in a healthy way rather than trying to force them out of your head. Spending time alone with your thoughts will make you recognize your innermost emotions and conflicts. 

I started meditation with a measly 10 minutes a day. I haven't missed a day since I started, and I now meditate for 30–45 minutes daily. Also, after dinner and wrapping up work, I take a walk with a pocket notebook and no phone. The notebook is there to capture my thoughts, and the phone is not there to avoid distractions.

Way #5 - Redirect your energy

As mentioned, an existential crisis can arise due to many reasons. Maybe you lost someone; you lost your job. A lot of it was going on during the pandemic. Meanwhile, you had to stay in isolation. Instead of focusing your energy on things you lost, try channeling your energy into your hobbies. It will work wonders, I promise you. (I am not saying forget about your lost loved ones but don't let that become an obstruction in your life)

I didn't need to overthink about this because the cause for my suffering was not writing. After the exams, I channeled all my energy into writing. Soon enough, I will be able to say I am a published writer.

Life moves on, so should you.

Way #6 - Don't dwell on the past

You can get severely depressed when you start looking at your past. My mantra is, "Mistakes are meant to be made but not to be repeated." Instead of taking regrets from your past, take lessons. Use these lessons to move forward in life.

In Summary

Recognizing the signs and causes of an existential crisis is crucial to determine where to look for help. Once identified, then only you can work your way towards a solution to come out of the mental prison.

To place everything altogether:

Causes of Existential crisis:

1. Death of a loved one

2. Sudden change in circumstances

3. Unfulfillment or dissatisfaction in life

Signs of Existential crisis:

1. Lack of motivation

2. Depression / Suicidal Thoughts

3. Questioning everything

4. Regret over past choices/decisions

Ways to overcome Existential crisis:

1. Change in Mindset / Adjustment of viewpoint

2. Maintain a gratitude journal

3. Connect with people

4. Practice mindfulness

5. Redirect your energy

6. Don't dwell on the past

Thank you for reading.