change your feelings
When You're Feeling Alone and Unloved
Are you feeling alone and unloved? It's the pits, right?
The bad news is that feeling this way often means that you are alone and unloved or unappreciated by the people around you.
The good news is that there are several things you can do to change your feelings, so read on to learn how!
1) Acknowledge That You Feel Bad
It can be challenging to talk about being lonely, but being honest about your feelings is an essential first step in understanding how to help yourself feel better. If you ignore how you feel, you'll feel worse.
Try to avoid any bad habits or negative behaviors that could make things worse, such as drinking or shopping excessively.
Once you've been honest about how you feel, turn your attention outward – there are plenty of people who care about you and want to help if they know what's going on.
2) Reach Out To Friends and Family
If you're feeling unhappy or down, chances are someone in your life can relate. Connecting with people who understand what you're going through (or have been there themselves) can be incredibly validating.
Talking about what's going on with a loved one will make you feel better by giving you a chance to vent your frustrations and bounce ideas off each other.
If it's easier, consider reaching out to them via text message—you might be surprised at how quickly they respond!
They might also suggest some great strategies that will help pull you out of your rut, such as hanging out with friends more often or working on an upcoming project together.
3) permit Yourself to Not Be Strong
If you're feeling alone, it's okay to feel that way.
Sometimes it can be difficult to deal with all of life's ups and downs, but instead of trying to power through it all on your own, sometimes allowing yourself to fall apart can help you put things back together again.
It may be scary, but permitting yourself not to be strong or not to have things under control will give you space and time (and permission) to accept that you are having a bad day or a hard time.
Inevitably, these feelings pass.
If they don't seem like they will, seek out therapy or talk with someone who makes you feel loved and safe to start healthily working through things.
4) Reassure Yourself
It can be easy to feel lost, alone, or even unloved.
It's also natural to want validation when you feel like these things are happening.
But it's important not to give in to that temptation.
The best thing you can do is reassure yourself that these feelings will pass if you give them time.
Don't feed into negative thoughts – they only perpetuate those feelings of loneliness and unworthiness!
Instead, think about your strong qualities and how they make you a great person worthy of love!
If possible, reach out to someone who will provide a listening ear (friends are good!) or distract yourself by doing something fun, so these negative feelings don't get under your skin.
5) Try Something New
Instead of spending time by yourself wishing you had a partner, try to be more social.
Take up a new hobby, start going to new restaurants or try something different in your free time that will allow you to interact with other people.
Not only will being around other people help distract you from missing your partner, but it might also put you in contact with someone who shares similar interests as you.
Try meeting up with friends or attending events where there are likely to be several single people; even if nothing comes of it, at least you'll have fun.
And don't forget to get out into nature too!
Fresh air and greenery can do wonders for our moods.
6) Stay Positive About the Future
If you stay positive about your future, you can feel better.
Each day, take some time to write down what makes you proud of yourself and think about why those characteristics are important.
It could be a character like compassion, perseverance, or hard work, but it doesn't matter what trait it is as long as it positively defines you.
Then, when you're feeling alone and unloved, remember that there's something valuable inside of you—and don't ever forget to recognize it.
There will always be times when you're struggling with loneliness, but remembering that you have value within yourself will help make things easier.
Placing your worth will make life more fulfilling.
7) Allow Yourself to Mourn
If you have lost a loved one, have a broken relationship, or feel lonely due to some other reason, your feelings are entirely normal.
However, letting yourself grieve is often seen as a weakness or taboo in today's society; we are supposed to just get over it or buck up when things get tough.
Instead of pushing your grief aside, give yourself time to deal with what has happened. Write out how you feel in detail.
Cry if you need to—and make sure that it is okay to cry!
Allow yourself moments each day when you can be alone with your thoughts and memories; embrace these moments fully.
Before long, you will be able to look back on these times as precious gifts rather than painful experiences.
8) Know How Long to Give It
Sometimes it takes a little time to find love, but there's no reason to spend your whole life waiting.
Consider an online dating service if you're looking for a quick fix.
While that doesn't sound very romantic, some of them have great features that make them easy and fun to use, so you may find that you enjoy using an online service.
But even if you don't meet your soul mate right away, the chances are good that meeting new people will bring more joy into your life than sitting at home alone or being with someone who makes you feel worse about yourself.
If nothing else, it will get your mind off of things—and sometimes, simply distracting yourself can be enough to turn around a rough patch in life.
There's also no shame in going out and doing something yourself.
No one likes to be lonely, but feeling lonely isn't a good enough reason to remain single forever.
The trick is knowing when you need help and just need a distraction. Don't sit at home all day feeling sorry for yourself; do something!
Whether calling up friends or joining an interest group, finding new activities will give you something productive to do instead of obsessing over why Mr. Right hasn't walked through your door yet.
And remember: A little time on your own is not necessarily bad; after all, taking care of yourself means that when someone does come along, he'll see how amazing you are—which might give him second thoughts about leaving!