Body Battles

Why am I so pale? Why do I have to be fat? Oh, don't forget the dimples. Do I always have a double chin? Is that what everyone else sees?

One of the biggest insecurities I have faced as a female is my body. I have never felt like I looked good enough to wear a bikini, spaghetti straps, or even shorts. While some days I feel like I look good enough in a certain light and mirror, I will occasionally wear some of these things. Or sometimes after watching Trisha Paytas mukbang videos, I feel her positivity and confidence shine through to me. Unfortunately, rarely do I ever like what I am or what I see.

If I am being honest with myself, I am quite average with a side of thickness. What I mean by that is I can shop for clothes easily (that doesn't mean I like how I look in everything I try on) but sometimes find myself heading to the plus size section of the store if I saw a shirt that "came in a large, but would probably look better if I had an XL."

On the other hand, I would like to recognize the people who might feel low about themselves for their bodies, but bodies that they think are "too skinny" or "not curvy enough." I realize that over the past few years, the body positivity movement has been in full swing, and what this movement is trying to tell everyone is: No matter what color, shape, age, gender, or size you are—you are NORMAL and WORTHY OF LOVE AND HAPPINESS.

I know it's easier said than done, but I've come up with some key points I have lived by to gain happiness and break free from the chains society has tried to lock me up in.

Now to the point... here are nine things that everyone should try to do and keep in mind in order to learn how to accept your body and love yourself.

#1 Love others for who they are!

If you are here reading this because you struggle to love yourself, start small by loving others. By this, I mean love everyone who you know for their personalities, NOT by their gym routine, naturally "perfect" figures, or other choices they make with their bodies (such as tattoos, piercings, who they decide to share a love life with, or their clothes). I'm not telling you to love someone who treats you poorly or you simply do not get along with, but to love your friends, co-workers, classmates, acquaintances, and even someone you just met for who they are. This might sound like "treat others the way you would want to be treated" and you would be right to think that. Although that's an age-old saying, it is all to true and real. You wouldn't want someone to like you for your physical appearance only, so don't think that way about others.

#2 Watch/follow body positive accounts & videos.

Whether it be Ashley Graham, Bodyposipanda, TED Talks, or Trisha Paytas as mentioned before, it could be anyone! Obviously, I included this point because no matter how tough or strong you are, everyone could use some support and strong words of encouragement to help you block the bad and radiate the good.

#3 Consider your health.

Actually think about if and why your health is at risk. (Not a doctor) but if your weight is causing you to have heart problems or joint problems, make that a priority to work on. If you are thinking about how you never did as good in gym class as the other girls in high school, that's another thing. One of my best friends was "teeny tiny" and was not good at anything athletic. There is a difference between being skinny or bigger and being athletic. Some of us were not made to be good at sports and that's A-Okay! I've tried every sport in the book and never found that I enjoyed any of them the way I should have if I had really wanted to play.

#4 Take care of yourself.

Duh, right? Work out, eat healthy. Nope. Actually, it’s more than that and doesn't even have to be that. This point is related to #3 and here is why. Personally, I like to try to hit the gym a few times a week, and emphasis of the "few." I love pasta, and I love Dr. Pepper, but I actually enjoy trying to come up with meals that are not just empty calories. I believe that I feel much better after eating a meal with protein and fiber but, I still balance satisfaction with health. So, have Taco Bell for lunch, and chicken salad for dinner, or vice versa. In short, it doesn't matter how you mix it up, or if you mix it up, just be vigilant and give your body the calories, fiber, proteins, and even carbs that it needs.

#5 Don't kill yourself trying to be something that you aren't.

I have tried it all, anorexia, bulimia, going way too hard at the gym, and nothing makes you feel worse about yourself than being so mean to your body. Please, please, PLEASE remember that destroying your body is destroying your brain. You WON’T feel any better after throwing up your meal and running on a treadmill until you almost pass out (I would know). I cannot stress enough what I mentioned before: mix it up, workout to feel better and/or stronger, but do it for the right reasons. Hint: the right reason is not that you don't look good enough.

#6 Don't talk bad about your appearance.

We all need to talk about our feelings sometimes, whether it be with a friend, a loved one, or a therapist. We are human and are bound to have our ups and downs. When you start to have a moment of weakness because you're insecure about your body, talk sensibly to someone (or yourself) about what you are feeling and work to find a solution or way to accept it.

For Example: Do not say "I hate my thighs, they're so lumpy and big. Gross."

Instead say "My thighs are bothering me. I'm going to focus on that this week at the gym."

See the difference?

#7 Have more confidence than they think you should.

I literally tell myself this every single day I walk outside. Part of fighting your insecurities is fighting off your fear of what others might think about you. NEWS FLASH! No one, and I mean NOBODY is judging you as hard as you are judging you (And if they are, they have their own insecurities to worry about). Seriously, be confident in your skin and no one will question you. And side note, people love confident, yet humble and kind people. Be good, be true, and be you.

#8 Live!

Stop worrying about how you look when you go out. You left the house today with a goal in mind. Whether it was to go on a date, or buy groceries. Strive and enjoy everything you set out to do.

#9 Be a key!

A key? what? Warning: Major Cliché. Yeah, remember what I said before? "...gain happiness and break free from the chains society has tried to lock me up in." You must be mentally strong to break your chains and be who you were meant to be. Some needs a boost, and if you can help just one person by unlocking their chains, you just made the world a better place.

If you read all this, thank you. If you skimmed, I still want to thank you. I hope this did something for someone. Have a great day.

Alanna Spriggs