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All humans hold a super power to shape their lives exactly how they want it.

The power of CHOICE and how powerful it truly is.

By Nicole ConradPublished 4 years ago 7 min read
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I begin this path of creating a voice for my readers. To stir up the soul we so many times quiet. And, I find this amazing because when we speak of our experiences and CHOICES. We seem to say, the heart and mind don't ever match up. Therefore, we question our decisions. We seem to silence the part that has engrained knowledge. The term "Old Soul", that truly, is in all of us. As, though there is knowledge of something within before our brain catches up. So, why are we choosing to ignore this? Why are we choosing anything without realizing, we have total control of OUR choices. Wow, isn't that so powerful? The only thing we can control as humans, is OUR choices. We cannot control other humans, but, can completely shape and form our life exactly how we want it, based on our choices. This is not a, "How To" or easy tips to hone in on this powerful gift. It is just your wake up call.

What I personally find so powerful about "Choice" is that, this began when we were children. We may not even remember till usually after 3 years old, that is when the brain seems to start to cement images. We become a bit, less abstract. So, we begin with simple choices. I want juice, not milk. I want mac 'n' cheese, not broccoli. Then, as we got older the choice become more difficult and we seem to get divided. At, some point choice was very black and white and then became more abstract as we age. So, there is a reversal. We are more concrete in memory and more abstract with choice. This is because we have been exposed to more experiences and options.

As, I begin to talk about the experiences and options making "Choices" seem more difficult. Now, we usually use choices to describe relationships. This is the biggest topic. Most the memes we see are relationship based. You meet a guy and all of a sudden choice is all you are walking on. This is a very thin wire. The reason is because we are programming ourselves now to think for more than just one. And, the mind and body have to learn this behavior. And, we have to understand we don't have control on them and their behavior only ourselves. So, we usually go into any relationship with toe in the water. Because we can choose and usually we do. To let that person control how we feel. But, still, at the end of the day. We can choose to smile and not let the breakup or hurt feelings effect us and our state of mind. We still have control over our own mind, body and soul.

The "Old Soul" we refer to seems to crave and understand human interactions. This invisible figure inside all of us gives us those feelings, and desires. As though we have been doing this our entire life. But, we may only be 15 and this is our first love. So, how can that be? That is your heart and soul. Then we have the mind. Now, this is not a scientific journal. Because those in science would say, that it is a chemical reaction that stimulates a certain part of the brain and releasing serotonin, comparing it to addiction such as drugs. Totally valid. But, we still seem to ignore gut which I think is more mental related, and then what the heart wants. We see the red flags or we think they are too nice, to good for you etc... this is how we choose. And, we definitely choose based on how we have been raised/ our environment. But, we always know the answer. We always say, "I knew it was too good to be true." " I knew he was the one and I messed up." " I should have just gone with my gut instinct." And, that is why I say the gut is actually your mind telling you what the red flags were or the choices you made were not correct or they were. Keep reading because choice is so important to understand. And, our children need to understand the super power they hold.

I call it a super power because it is!!!! This is the one thing that literally shapes and forms your life that you live. Yes, our past and our upbringing have everything to do with choices made. But, again, we have control to choose how we make choices, and recite over and over, "I will not let my past dictate my future." So, let's begin with something simple. Are you single? yes this actually is a choice. You may say, "No, it isn't because you can't just find love overnight." You are correct. BUT, are you actively trying to seek love? Again, choice. If I want to find a mate, how are we choosing to find this mate? Are we hoping he just shows up one day on a white horse? Are we on dating sites? Are we ignoring the cute guy eyeing us at the bar because you are to intimidated. Or, at the store and you just continue to walk even though everything in our body and mind says, "GO FOR IT!!" Are we choosing not to live boldly and take chances? creature of comfort create stillness and no growth. Because, I can personally say, that, I have missed many opportunities because I was intimidated, or just scared. Yet, I have also, made choices out of my comfort zone and decided to grab life by the balls and have made extraordinary connections due to that, therefore, it has shaped my life for both good and bad.

The BIGGY, "I cant leave my relationship because of the kids." This is such a loaded statement. One, you can leave. Two, science and experts state that staying in an unhealthy relationship is actually worse for the child in the long run. And, that children know, and can sense when a relationship is unstable, therefore, effecting their sense of security and stability both physically and mentally. This also, ties in to how we make decisions based on our upbringing and environment. So, you are, A. choosing to stay, B. Making excuses by using your children as the scape goat, C. Choosing to be unhappy. And, D. the hardest pill to swallow. Ready for it?? Your children will having a higher chance of being unhappy because you model behavior for your children to learn from. You modeled, that it was, okay, to live unhappy, not leave and that maybe even, being mean to their significant other is the only way to be. YOU. YES YOU, demonstrated that behavior!! You made the choice to not do what was best for you and your children. And, you knew, staying was not the answer. So, we have experienced this ourselves, we have all know someone to do this. And, we always tell ourselves and our friends to go and be happy. I used this example for an entire paragraph because this example is the best way to have you relate to this article and truly understand that yes, we really do have the choices to live the exact life we want to live.

I write this because as a mother and adult. I have made a lot of bad choices. And, at the end of the day. I only have myself to blame. I have formed my life based around my decisions. My mom always buying fast food as a kid for me all the time, that made me overweight as a child. I had the choice to not eat it, but, I did. I had the choice to eat healthier options as an adult. So, when I was overweight as an adult and I am blaming my mom for creating these patterns. I was still choosing excuses over actions. The truth is, I buy my own groceries now. So, less chips and more kale. And, I made the choice to lose 170 pounds on my own. I chose to ignore the red flags in relationships leading to 2 divorces. I CHOSE! So, lets' really start looking into this super power we hold. Let's show are children how to create and mold their life exactly they way they want. Because, they can. And, at any point in your life where you want to grow, move or change. YOU CAN! Even at 75 you can change your life. Do you kick off your dancing shoes, or do you grab life and make it your dancing partner. That is your, CHOICE!!

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