A Moment of Inspiration

As part of my plan of becoming a better version of myself and a better human being, I'm going to starting a new series called "My 30 Days of Gratitude." I've spent so many years fighting, arguing, and rebelling against life that I have lost myself in the process. I failed school, I hooked up with horrible guys, I partied all night every night, and I destroyed my relationship with my family. Continuing on this path, I would be so far down into a dark hole, I'm not sure I would be able to get back out. Before the new year approached, I had already planned on making some changes in my life. So many positive, life-changing things have already happened in 2018 that I'm going to be doing a complete lifestyle cleanse. Get rid of the old, bring in the new. And new me is taking a stand on my life. To kick off this lifestyle change, I will be writing about something I'm grateful for every day for the next 30 days.

A week ago I went to see a educational advisor at my university about where I wanted to take my college career. I've made some major jumps in majors and careers. My last decision I hated so much, that I stopped caring and purposefully self-sabotaged. So, I finally made the decision that I needed some professional help, and I went to see an advisor who could do just that. I went into the meeting thinking I wanted to be a high school English teacher, and I left the meeting still unsure of what career I wanted, but more confident in myself that I would be able to figure it out. This nice lady helped me map out the next two years of my college career, gave me a list of career choices to decide from, settled the troubling concerns of my parents, and gave me a level of confidence I didn't know that I needed. She told stories about her own struggles with finding her career path, how she walked into a math test, looked at the paper, turned it in blank, and went straight to the advising off to switch her major. Now, I can safely say that I have never turned in a blank test, but I have filled in random answers because I just didn't know. It helped me feel a lot better about the last three years of my college career. She helped me pick some new classes and mapped out several options I have for the future. It was a great meeting!

When I got home that day, I was explaining to my mother everything the advisor said. I sat at the kitchen island and was so enthusiastic; I saw all the love and proudness in her eyes. She's been through so much this year that it was so wonderful to see that kind of emotion from her. AND she was absolutely thrilled for me! She came up to me and gave me a hug and said that she had been praying to the Lord about me, asking other people to pray for me, constantly thinking about me, talked about me, and now I had FINALLY I had gotten it all together. This was my moment of inspiration. This was the exact moment I felt everything I needed to feel and know to be 100% sure of what I was doing, and to be motivated to actually do it. There were so many times I said I would start doing it and so many times I just sat around watching TV or going to a bar. Hearing her words of prayer and love are all the inspiration I needed.

I was/am so inspired to grow and build and become an adult. For just a brief moment, all my mom needed to say was that God had answered her prayers, this was all I needed to kickstart my life into full gear. This was my moment of inspiration. And let me tell you. It feels good. It feels so good I can't even begin to explain all the stress and weight that has been lifted off my shoulders.

I am forever grateful for my mother, but I'm even more grateful for this little moment of inspiration :)