A Beautiful Encouragement: We May Be Ugly, But We Are Here

Two years ago, I was 30 years old and my life took a sudden shift. I broke up with my boyfriend of 6 years (it was a clean breakup, by the way), just because I suddenly had this thought in my mind that I wasn’t ready for the next step—which was to settle down. A year after that, I quit my job of 7 years to venture into business. I don’t know where I got the courage, but I did step out of my comfort zone.

To be honest, I don’t know if this was the path I was supposed to take, but when I look back I don’t feel any regrets but just confused as to what should I be doing with my life. I know that God pushes us out of our comfort zones, but how should I know that this is the path I’m supposed to take? If I made the right decision, why do I feel lost and confused? Shouldn’t I feel ecstatic or at least feel little contentment?

A lot of people today are probably in the same situation as I am. The pandemic did give a lot of us realizations and a shift in perspective. As I was scrolling through social media, where I usually find motivational quotes to remind us that we’re not alone in this and that it’s okay to feel this, I then came across the phrase “Pito nou led, nou la” which is a Haitian saying that means “we may be ugly, but we are here”. I got curious and so I searched for the meaning behind it.

A Haitian-American author named Edwidge Dandicot explains that “This saying makes a deeper claim for poor Haitian women than maintaining beauty, be it skin deep or otherwise. For most of us, what is worth celebrating is the fact that we are here, that we against all the odds exist.”

Despite the hardships that were faced by the Haitian people, that they may not have the best living conditions, they still are alive and grateful for that—and that is more important.

PITO NOU LED, NOU LA

We may be ugly, but we are here.

A beautiful saying isn’t it? Makes you wonder how one can have that kind of perseverance. No matter how ugly our life becomes, we should be thankful that we are still here. And that against all odds, we still exist. I think that is what everybody needs and I believe that’s what I needed, that kind of strength and hope for a better life. After reading more about its meaning, I realized that I also needed more patience. Patience and hope to wait for that positive shift in my life. There is a reason why I made those decisions two years ago, and there is a reason why God kept me waiting. I just need to have faith in Him.

I also realized that worrying more if I’m making the right decisions or taking the right path, doesn’t let me enjoy life which is what we’re supposed to be doing. Life is there to be enjoyed, to live in the moment and not worry about the future or regret the past. And most importantly, to be grateful that we’re still able to enjoy life. I hope that as I find grace through this Haitian saying, you'll find it too.

“Nothing is perfect. Bad things happen. Dreams don’t always come true. Once you accept life for the broken mess that it is, you’ll learn to give yourself some grace. The world is a scary place but your mind doesn’t have to be.”

– Holly Chester