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Who Cares?

Autopsy of the Dead?

By Shanon NormanPublished about a year ago Updated about a year ago 3 min read
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photograph of the worst hand in Poker

If we say "I don't care" - someone will think we are horrible. I know because while I was "homeless" and heard the phrase "I don't care" I did think those people were horrible.

There are some people who like to cut up dead bodies and investigate the insides of the corpse. Some of these "scientists" cut up brains for after-death psychological analysis. I find that gross and boring. It's like a bad make-up job done on a corpse at a funeral. Yuck. It's bad enough we have to go to a ceremony and look at a corpse to prove that death happened, but then you want to try to make the corpse look as good as the person who died? An exercise in futility in my opinion.

Sometimes I say "I don't care" and I've tried to explain why because I believe I spent a lot of my time and life on trying to be passionate, righteous, and caring. So when I get to the point of saying "I don't care" it means that I do not feel passionate, or righteous, or caring. How can I go to such extremes? If you know the answer I feel sorry for you. If you don't know the answer it is quite simple: The passionate, the righteous, and the caring attract the opposite which drains them to the point of finally stating with pensive conviction, "I don't care."

They may recover after some time alone or in the company of those who still care, but after you've reached that point, you take that phrase a lot less seriously. For me, instead of getting stuck saying "I don't care" (which believe me is sometimes the nicest thing I can say) I try very, very hard to search my puny brain to find a better phrase or word like maybe "I don't like that" or "Who cares?"

When you're down on your luck, in a bad place in life or home or work and you're looking for some comfort or advice, the last phrase you want to hear is "I don't care" but sometimes we bark up the wrong tree because whoever we thought might "care" is exhausted from caring and doesn't have any left to share. At that point, it's best not to take it personally, and instead search for someone who still "cares" and might be able to listen better or help more. Someone has to push me very far before I give them a sincere "I don't care" statement. I'm guilty of having done it to many of the people who loved me the most. Because when I was at my worst and lowest spots in life, I didn't even know how to take their help. I was so lost and depressed I didn't even see that I was biting the hand that was feeding me. Sad, but true it is that so many times we hurt and get hurt by the very ones that we love the most. That's what some poets and singers meant when they sang "Love Hurts."

Oh sure, you'll get the defenders of love proclaiming that Love isn't supposed to hurt and of course they are not wrong to some degree. When love is working the way it should be, it doesn't hurt. But I'm talking about passionate love. Love that has loyalty and passion is going to end up hurting, and if you don't know that, then all I can say is that the love you've known has only been lukewarm.

I've known great passionate and loyal love. I"ve been burned for it. I've suffered for it. I probably did it to myself. I healed also. That's what they mean by healing takes time. "What becomes of a broken heart?" another singer sang. Not much. The person probably survived and became a bit wiser, a bit stronger. The broken hearted don't always commit suicide like Romeo and Juliet. Many of us just patch up that old used heart and carry on. To me, that's caring, and that's the best you can do, once you've experienced the best romantic love that is available.

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Shanon Norman

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  • Jay Kantor12 months ago

    Shannon - A pleasure to 'bounce' around all of your topics: "Love Hurts," Indeed: As spun around in my head, all of my life, the Everly Brothers tune made a big dent in my love life. I like the way you just 'talk' to your readers; a lovely delivery and presentation technique. I, too write a lot about Heartsy Love Lost & Found. And, like you I'm a pet-tail-tale person: Recently my silly (3) minute story 'Rescue' written on behalf of - Pet Haven Minnesota - received a lot of Pet Adoptions; Shannon, that makes me smile! As you would probably say; power of the pen! I've subscribed to you: I look forward to your next 'Relatable-Adventure' And, as Rick Nelson once sang 'Garden Party'..."You can't please everyone so may as well please yourself!" Jay Kantor, Chatsworth, Cal 'Senior' Vocal Author

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