What You "Do" Is Not Who You Are

How many times have you walked into a party or event and been introduced to new people who almost immediately ask you what you do? As if your answer to that question is going to direct and define that whole conversation. I've always hated that question for so many reasons. Everyone is always quick to say their job and what they do for a living but are we not much more than that? Why would you put all of your self-worth into what you do for a living? To be frank, I think it's bullshit. If I'm an accountant do I just tell people I'm an accountant and that's that? Why would I limit myself to that? In my mind, that didn't answer the question. Sure, accounting is what you do for a living but what about all of that stuff you do that you actually enjoy and that you consider in one way or another to be apart of you? The stuff that you don't consider to be work.

If you answered someone in this way they usually look at you funny and then ask, "I meant what do you do for a living?" Really? You want to know what I do for a living? You want to define me by the thing that I show up every day to do to earn money? Sure, it might set your world on fire and accounting might honestly fire you up! I'm not trying to discredit anyone who defines themself by their profession. Not in the slightest. I would define myself by my profession too if I had just one! But I'm trying to get you to dig deeper than what you do for money. We live in a society that is so obsessed with money and possessions. It's all about what you have versus what you've done or who you've helped. Genuinely helping people with no agenda generally doesn't pay well. But, to me, it's worth more than anything I could do that would pay me a dime.

Forget what you do for a paying job for a second and dip deeper. Search within yourself for what you really like. Is it art? Great! Is it hiking and exploring? More power to you! Is it being a parent to your kids? Then who should stop you from telling people that that is who you are and what you do? Someone asking you what you do shouldn't be a quick easy answer. It shouldn't be, "I'm an accountant for such and such bank." It should be something more like, "Well I work as an accountant for such and such but I'm also a parent with two little kids who likes to read historical biographies in my free time and also go hiking and exploring on the weekends and when I have absolute free time from my kids I like to draw pictures and create cartoons." Which one of these paints a better picture of who you are?

Bingo.

The moral of the story is don't let your job define who you are. And even if you do love your job and what you do there's usually more to the story than that. For example, "I'm a CrossFit Coach." Okay, well let's dig more into that and discover why you love it and why you love to help people and make people healthier and improve human movement, etc. Also, even if you 100% love what you do there's almost always more to you than meets the eye. Don't sell yourself short and put yourself into these little boxes and categories that people like to use to define you. Express yourself and what you enjoy doing freely and let your passions and desires define who you are. Not what you simply do to make a living.

There's so much more to you than that and people deserve to hear about who you truly are. Next time someone asks you what you do throw a curveball back at them and tell them all of the things you really like to do and save what you do for money last. Who knows, you may just unlock something inside of them that allows them to express who they are as well. And I can guarantee that that awkward party conversation will be better as a result! You'll connect with people on a much deeper level and you'll be laughing and having a more meaningful conversation in no time. Who knows, you might even make a friend or two.

Get After It.