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The Drive To Pursue Your Dreams

The Drive To Pursue Your Dreams

By Pike.Stuartud Published 3 years ago 4 min read
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The Drive To Pursue Your Dreams
Photo by Johannes Plenio on Unsplash

 In 1997, I was in a situation I never expected to find myself in - begging alone in New York City. I was 16 years old, homeless, and had been out of school for years, desperate to find a high school that I could attend.

  

  By then, my father had been estranged from us for some time, and although I knew he was at a nearby men's shelter, he would not help me at all. My mother had died shortly after that time, when a complicated illness caused by AIDS took her life. I have been homeless since my mother's death, sometimes sleeping at a friend's house, sometimes under the stairs of a building in the Bronx.

  

  I vividly remember lying on the marble floor at night, using my duffel bag as a pillow and my tattered shirt as a blanket, half asleep in the dim light. Sometimes I could hear the sounds from the house upstairs - children calling for their parents, cartoons on the TV and pots and pans clinking - all the sounds that turned an otherwise lifeless house into a warm home. To cope with the loneliness, I often thought about it.

  

  To cope with the loneliness, I often think about random thoughts. When I close my eyes, I imagine that my family is all together, that my mother is still alive, and that there are always some fine wrinkles around her eyes when she laughs. Me, my father, my mother, and Lisa's sister, all living peacefully under one roof. However, it was my future that was most vivid in my daydreams. I imagined myself sitting in school, diligently taking notes; I imagined myself walking through a college campus with autumn leaves rustling around me, but with my mind free of distractions, walking briskly toward class. In my fantasies, I found a sense of security and belonging, and soon fell asleep.

  

  My life today is nothing like it was then. Not only did I finish high school, but I graduated from Harvard University. I'm no longer in rags or sleeping in the hallway. Every night, I sleep peacefully in my own house. For the past 11 years, I've traveled the world helping people improve their lives. Simply put, you would never have seen me today from the person I used to be.

  

  Strangely enough, even with all the pain I've been through - perhaps that's why I believe that a modicum of scarcity is good for people. In fact, the phrase "the freedom of rabbit scarcity" has never been my goal. In fact, scarcity has been a motivator, not a hindrance, to the pursuit of my dreams.

  

  When I was a little girl trying to end my homelessness, I struggled to go to every school in Manhattan just to get one that would take me in. Always carrying a cracked CD player in my pocket, I used to walk around with two songs on loop to motivate me, one was "Me" by Paula Kerr and the other was "Far Away" by Keck. I saw my future and walked boldly toward it. Despite losing my home and having only a few clothes, a few song discs and a picture of my mother on me, I still imagined the future, I still wanted to act and get into Harvard. Like a captain steering his ship toward the shining stars, I knew where I wanted to go, and my goals guided my daily actions.

  

  While other schools said "No" to me, one high school said "Yes" to me. At the same time, a nonprofit organization called The Door provided me with counseling, medical care, and food so that I could do my homework in a train station or in a lighted hallway without fear. Looking back, I always met people who were willing to help me on my way to success.

  

  After two years of slogging through school in a homeless state, the New York Times picked up my story. In the weeks that followed, dozens of strangers came from all over the United States to meet with me. In high school, I began receiving handwritten letters that inspired me to study hard. Strangers brought me pastries, clothes and books, and they hugged me. One woman even hand-knitted a blanket for me while I was at Harvard, and the text message that came with it said, "It's going to be cold in those dorms, so I hope this blanket will warm you up and let you know that people care."

  

  Some of these kind people didn't even leave their names. But the people who helped me have changed me forever. Now that I'm on the board of directors of The Door, our team has started a middle school for homeless teens. I want to work hard to pave the way for others.

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