Beat the "Confidence Gap"

You know the moment in the car right before a job interview and your foot starts tapping uncontrollably? Next thing you know your hands are disgustingly clammy. You’re imagining walking in and shaking the interviewer’s hand. But wait. Your hands are sweating. Now you’re freaking out about touching someone with your sweaty hands and your legs start shaking more and more. The vicious cycle repeats over and over until there you are standing at the door about to put yourself out there – whether or not you’re ready.

I don’t know about you, but this feeling consumes me before every big career moment in my life. Whether it be moments before a class presentation, taking a phone call for an internship opportunity or interviewing for that exciting dream job. Although these pressure-filled situations can be extremely overwhelming at that moment, they are also exciting chances to grow in our careers and make a positive impression.

Through the years, I’ve learned to lean into the uncomfortableness and fear of embarrassment. Let those hands sweat and legs shake because it means you care enough to take it seriously. Unfortunately (although not surprisingly), The Harvard Business Review recorded a statistic from an internal report at Hewlett Packard stating that men apply for jobs in which they are 60% qualified whereas women only apply if they are 100% qualified. Shocker! Women tend to be less risky in job searches.

In the year 2020, it’s hard to understand why women still don’t see themselves as worthy equals to their male colleagues. Maybe it’s because we still don’t get paid equally or maybe it’s the passive “are you planning on having kids” undertones that are casually implied in many big career moves. Okay, I take it back, maybe we do know why. These things happen regularly even in women-dominant careers such as my own, public relations. Global Women in PR ran a study finding that although women make up two-thirds of the PR industry, 28% of men reported that they believe they will reach the top of the career ladder whereas only 18% of women reported the same confidence. This statistic alone captures the essence of the “confidence gap” between men and women.

Although these roadblocks come up constantly for women as we strive to improve ourselves and move up in our careers, this is a subtle nudge to forget the status-quo and pursue your dreams. Be an outlier in the ugly statistics that scream “you can’t do it.”

One thing I have learned in the grueling internship application process is to take risks. I know its cheesy, but as my mom always told me, you never know unless you try. Sending in a job application for something a little above your experience level isn’t unheard of and it shouldn’t be something to fear. In fact, it’s an exciting opportunity to learn and grow. If you want it, apply for it. Many employers will see it as a sign of willingness to take on challenges, which obviously can never be a bad thing.

Lastly, don’t be afraid to be personable. In any stage of the job search, it’s important to be authentic and true to who you are. One extremely easy way to go about it is by sending a hand-written thank-you note after an interview. It takes minimal effort, shows interest in the position and allows you to express yourself.

Basically, my biggest takeaway is that no matter how overwhelming and intimidating searching for the right job/internship/grad-school can feel, it is always better to put yourself out there and give everything you got. If you really try, the possibilities are endless.