A mother's word

💜A mother's word

A letter to the Parents of a Suicide victim.

I believe losing a child is the hardest loss there is and to any parents reading this who have lost a child, I wish I could hug you and take the pain away but unfortunately, no-one can. I want to tell you that the pain goes away, that time heals, that one day you wake up, and the ache is gone, the piece of your soul that was ripped out fills in, but I would be lying.

I can imagine the hell you are living through, I can imagine what you are feeling. I can imagine what your nights are like, as you don't sleep or walk into a bedroom that will forever be empty. I can imagine the conversation with your other children, trying to explain something you can't understand. I know what you are living through right now and I wish there was something I could do or say to make this better.

I'm sure there was a time you were living in denial of all that has occurred. Possibly you blame yourself. As a parent, your prime purpose is to protect your children from harm. But what happens when you can't protect your children from themselves? What happens when you suspect that something is wrong but every time you asked, they said, "I'm fine".

What happens when they leave the house and you aren't watching them and they're in a world you fear because you know what's out there?. As a parent the hardest thing is to watch your child hurt. The hardest thing is seeing them sad, or home alone on a Saturday night. The hardest thing is to know they are being bullied and there's nothing you can do about it. You tell them they're wonderful and beautiful in every way. Yet they come across people who tell them differently.

Then like so many cases it takes people by surprise. Your child was everyone's best friend. He or she was the one that excelled in academics or athletics with a future so bright. Sadly the saddest people often appear to be the happiest, always trying to make others feel better because they know what it is like to live in a dark world, consumed only by their own haunting thoughts.

Then they feel the only solution is to end their lives. Little did our children know suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem. They couldn't see past tomorrow even when we could. They couldn't see their bright future even when we did. And while these thoughts rush through your head of things they will never experience and things we will never see. You will still look back at everything and point a finger at yourself.

This is the greatest loss you will ever endure as a parent but I hope you find the strength you need to get through this. I hope you are surrounded by a community who love and support you. I hope this situation has brought your family closer together. The void of losing a child is one that will always stay with you, but our children did not die in vain.

Someone, somewhere will hear their story as long as you continue to tell it and they will be inspired to keep going. Tell their story and not just one that ended, but tell them everything they lived for. Use this situation as a way to raise awareness and a suicide prevention. Suicides has taken the lives of so many across the country. It can be stopped if we work together. By doing so another parent doesn't have to lose their child, another sibling doesn't need to lose their role model. Someone who once thought there was no hope for the future could hear your son or daughter's story and be motivated not to end their lives.

Our loved one's stay with us forever living within our hearts. One day our paths will cross again and you will realise despite their absence they have been with you all along.

💜