Why my best friend is the only (Marvel) heroine I need in my life

My marvelous and geeky love letter to my best friend.

Why my best friend is the only (Marvel) heroine I need in my life

Write about “Women who inspire”!?

Yeah, sure, easy! No problem!

That’s what I thought before my brain went totally blank and I stared at my screen for a looong time. Too long. I’m guessing my brain went into some kind of shock.

Because I thought to myself: How can I NOT think of any women in my life that inspires me? Or any another famous woman who inspires me? … Well, of course, there are Wonder Woman and Captain Marvel, two fictional and great super heroines. But what about real-life? What about real women?

Who the fuck inspires you, Jule?! Come on!

I couldn’t stop thinking about it and I kinda felt ashamed that there wasn’t a woman in my life who I feel inspired by. I know a lot of other women would initially pick their mother or grandmother … an aunt. But with me it isn’t that simple. It’s not that I love the women in my family but I’ve never had a real close connection. And even though they’re all remarkable women in their own way I rarely felt inspired by them.

Which seems hard to say but it’s my truth.

I was about to give up on that topic until it hit me really hard and kinda late (because: Duh, Jule!). Of course, there are women in my life who inspire me. One of them is my marvelous best friend.

When my best friend got really sick during the COVID-19 outbreak and let her dark sense of humour shine …

I know what you’re thinking: Omg, is this a hidden corona virus story?

No! Goddamn it, it’s not. It got triggered by it, yes. But it’s about:

My nerdy best friend who is tough as nails and the most optimistic person I know!

So, yes. She got really sick and because we’re living in these times now, there were worries and fears. That’s normal. And I’m sure I was more worried than her and even though we never really officially declared that I was a little terrified, I’m sure she knew.

(Well, now you know! Oops …)

But my best friend wouldn’t be my best friend, if she wouln’t make fun about it. So she sent me a gif with Spiderman from Inifity War. Yes, THAT gif! The one when he stumbles to Ironman and says: “I don’t feel so good!”. Right before he “dies”. #spoilers

Because that’s an appropriate way to tell me … and honestly, I laughed. My heart ached a little bit but I thought it was hilarious.

And that’s one thing I admire and deeply love about her. She never loses her sense of humour. Well, yes, it’s a dark and sometimes cynical sense of humour but she’s still joking and making me laugh. And I’m a sucker for cynicism and sarcasm, so that was right up my lane.

Here’s another example of what she sent me a few days later when we joked around because she still felt really sick:

And don’t worry. Of course, she’s fine now and probably off to some sheniagans.

When my best friend and me drove to a German Comic Con during an apocalyptic snow day …

And if you haven’t noticed yet. We are two HUGE Marvel Geeks. When endgame came out, I traveled back home to Germany so we can watch it together four times in two days.

Yes, we’re that committed. #nerdsassemble

With her great sense of humour also comes her great nerdiness and commitment to all that nerdy stuff. She’s a proud nerd and will tell everyone so. Even though, when we grew up in the 90s, nerds weren’t popular at all and I know she had a tough time then.

You couldn’t really say you were a nerd back then without being bullied or maybe hunted down. Yes, for all you youngsters out there, it was a thing most of us kept quiet about. Especially as a woman.

Tough times for nerds …

But that never stopped her from reading comics, books and watching all those great tv shows. She did it anyway. Because she’s stubborn as hell and she’s badass.

And so when finally the day came and we had our first big Comic Con in Dortmund, Germany! OMG! Of course, we needed to go!

So we drove right from work in Munich to Dortmund which is about 6 hours by car. That was also the day when we had an apocalyptic snow day! Because daaaamn, I’ve never experienced something like that before. Especially “trapped” in a little car on the Autobahn (German highway).

It was snowing so strongly and suddenly that big trucks were stuck on the Autobahn and just stood there quietly as weird obstacles to drive around. We also didn’t see super far but my best friend kept driving around the big trucks.

It felt like we were in one if these survival movies and all alone. I was just waiting for White Walkers to appear and smash our car …

But no matter how bad and scary it seemed she stayed cool and joked around. We both did. Because NOTHING would stop us to go to this Comic Con!

Fuck you, snow! You can’t stop us!

That‘s also something I truly admire about her. She’s like an unstoppable force in every situation and especially when it comes to nerdy things like comic cons, theater plays and traveling all the way to New York to watch “Dear Evan Hansen” on Broadway.

She never seems to be scared by anything or anyone. She just does what she needs to do.

Also, I wouldn’t have trusted anyone else to bring us safely through this snow storm to a Comic Con.

When my best friend has an obsession and needs to tell me all about it …

Every once in a while my best friend has a new obsession. For a while it was Doctor Strange. I mean, she still loves him but there was a time she did nothing else than reading all his comics and absorb every bit of information about him. Then there was the Mandalorian and other topics that fascinated her so much that she needed to know ALL about it.

Her endless curiosity and need for answers (she loves to ask questions) are some traits that really inspire me. She always finds something that she’s curious about and she doesn’t hesitate to do research.

And don’t get me started about how passionate she is during that obsession times. She‘s always super eager to tell me everything about it and I love to listen because her voice is so enthusiastic. I can hear the passion and pure joy in it and it makes me happy. Because she’s happy. Even though she sends me a 50 minutes voice message about a theatre play.

Don’t worry! I got you. And your obsession.

But honestly, I think this childlike curiosity and need for knowledge is something really rare. I only know few people who still have that in them. But no one can compare to her.

It’s kinda like when Tony Stark meets Natasha Romanoff the first time and instantly decides that he needs her in his life. Same thing with my best friend and a new obsession that enters her precious life!

When my best friend tells me that “I’m a Dramaqueen” in Sherlock-Style …

A good friendship is when you can tell each other the truth. No matter what. And yeah … my best friend also tells me once in a while that I’m acting like a dramaqueen or that I might exaggerate.

THAT’S SO NOT TRUE!!!! … point proven, I guess. #ohthedrama

But she mostly tells me that in a very cute and nerdy way by sending me this gif:

I actually think that we mostly communicate with gifs or voice messages … which is kinda weird. But that’s how we roll, nerds.

It’s good to have one who calls you out, when you’re a drama queen or when you exaggerate things or overthink. But there are also times when you need to go with the flow and just get into drama mode as well.

I love how she always knows what I need in the exact moment. She knows when she needs to tell me “Jule, calm down. That’s not worth it” or “Tell me where he/she lives and I’m gonna punsh them in their stupid faces!”. It’s a fine line but she masters it.

She just knows because she knows me. But that’s why she’s my Watson.

With her ability to listen closely and giving me the truth if needed, she is also someone who knows exactly her boundaries with others. Some people might think that it makes her arrogant or “cold” but I admire her for that.

Because I’m someone who struggles with keeping up boundaries for myself. I would give all my energy and life for other people, if she wouldn’t be there to remind me that I’m not responsible for every single person.

When my best friend saves screenshots from our chats to remind me how awesome I am …

She only told me that a couple of days ago and it really made me tear up a little. She has been saving screenshots from our chats when I was talking about my dreams, successes and when I told her about my proud moments. Kind of everything that would remind me how awesome I am.

I mean … how AWESOME is she?! Gosh, so many feelings right now …

When she confessed it, she also told me that she does that because she wants to support me properly when I need it … THAT really makes me cry. Because I have had a couple of friends and of course I have my family but she’s just one in a kind and I’ve never felt such an unconditional support before.

And if you think now that this is super cheesy, then you haven’t read our chats yet ( and you never will! That’s private, man!). But the only thing we haven’t done yet is writing each other love poems about our dope-ass friendship. I swear, we both can be super cheesy and big cry-babies while we’re telling us how much we love each other.


So, my dear best friend, my Watson to my Sherlock, my Natasha to my Clint, my Doctor to my Cap, my Buzz to my Woody, my Doctor Strange to my Wong, this article is for YOU!

Because you’re such a badass, optimistic, witty and creative woman who always has all the questions I’d never ask, never loses her sense of humour even in the hardest of times and who inspires me to become not only a better woman but also better human.

I’m with you ‘til the end of the line, Sorceress Supreme!

Feeling supportive and all cheesy now? Then don’t hesitate and give me a little tip! I’d appreciate the support.

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Julia Valentina
Julia Valentina
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Julia Valentina

When I’m not hunting demons with Dean and Sam or looking for hidden treasures with Indiana Jones, I’m writing on stories and geeky, nerdy stuff and sometimes (ok, most of the time) I’m fangirling. But most of all I love to tell stories.

See all posts by Julia Valentina