What's In a Name...?

A person's name could very well be their single most important identifying trait.

It's the identifier that we use when introducing ourselves around. (Albeit, that I am beginning to have a problem remembering to place a name with a face; and others are prone to butchering my first name without my even hearing the mishap [Ken, Brent, Curt, Brett, Kenneth, etc.]).

I am trying far better to remember other peoples' names (or at least honestly ASK THEM to repeat themselves and OWN the mistake); and I'm starting to pick up on mispronunciations of my own name and beginning to actually correct people.

Anyway, I'm Kent Brindley.

I am NOT "Clark Kent, Kent Cigarettes, Clark Kent County..." (I've never been all that impressed with Superman while I favored the likes of He-Man, Spider-Man, Batman, or Green Lantern. The consistent INTENTIONAL "Clark Kent" cracks are NOT improving my opinion of "The Man of Steel.")

My NAME is simply KENT (It was the family surname of some of earliest ancestors on record). If "CLARK Kent" is a simply memory trick for you, it's understandable, and I'll allow it a couple of times; you just don't have to say it out loud to my face every time you see me.

A person's name is sacred. It's how they know that you're calling them. It lets them know that they've been positively identified.

Albeit, sometimes, that comes in the form of a nickname and private joke...

*****************************

I need to take this back to my Grand Valley days; I think it was still my first semester, so it would have been late 2005.

I wasn't feeling that well that day (and, honestly, should have stayed home that night) but Campus Ministry was off to here a speaker and I wasn't always wise about picking between hanging out with Campus Ministry or taking care of myself back then.

Anyway, along comes one of my friends and, out of the clear blue, THIS is the conversation starter...

"From here on out, your nickname is 'K$'. It sounds cool!"

...How am I supposed to argue that logic with a guy who insists on being called "D'Mo?" Instead, I was honestly kind of sick the night that I was introduced to this question and felt pretty cranky. I fought the new misnomer tooth-and-nail (and, when it's clear that a friend has touched a nerve, some people KEEP jabbing at the same nerve).

It took maybe a month (and, of course, by then, the nickname was making the rounds around GVSU's Campus Ministry circuit). What was the use of fighting it anymore? It did kind of sound cool (Besides, on the low odds I'd meet another Kent [obviously a cool guy with an even better name], there would be only ONE K$! This does go back to my point of a person's name being their identifier when they're being spoken to).

...Pretty soon, I was doing one worse than getting a new nickname: I was using "K$" in the third person. I mumbled "MONEY!" out of consternation to scold myself when I made a social error (that WASN'T a 21-22-23 year old addressing himself in the third person). When I bombed out with pledging my heart to yet another girl, "K$" had made the mistake; I was just LIVING with it. And to this day, when I'm in my "Super Sports Fan" persona upon RETURNING to campus for football or basketball games, anytime I start behaving in an "unsportsmanlike" manner for a spectator, it's "K$'s" doing.

The new name was expanding, not going away, and it just became one more memory of my GV days 0f lore to look back on and miss...

***************************

Okay, I relented on "K$" in the nick of time and it began to grow on me. That was NOT to say for "CLARK Kent!" (Seriously; just no. I was NEVER a Superman fan and neither of my greatest ancestors who carried the surname of "...Kent" were named Clark). The greatest offender of the "Clark Kent" mantra (to the point of introducing me as such to people whom had never met me and, therefore, confusing the poor souls) was soon EQUALLY renamed "Captain Kirk." An understanding was eventually reached that when "Clark Kent" went away, so would "Captain Kirk;" an understanding that I stuck to...

************************************

There is a difference between a nickname or misnomer that is obviously not your own. It is something else to be greeted with...

"...You're the one who I always want to call Dan."

Negative. My name is not now, and never was, "Dan." KENT will do.

***************************************

A person's name (or at least their preferred name) is a sacred identifier to them. I'm trying to do better about remembering OTHER'S names, and at least asking permission MOST OF THE TIME before I use a shorthand/nickname/misnomer. (By the way, there was also a time when I let sincere accidental misnomers slide; "Kent" is kind of uncommon [in North America] and can be hard to remember if you don't see me all of the time. I AM reaching the point of feeling enough pride in myself and my name to correct people as kindly as...well, as kindly as a person who has allowed the wrong name to slip for a bit too long).

It can be a challenge to HONESTLY remember every name of every person you've ever met once or twice in your life. When in doubt, it never hurts to be honest enough to ASK again. Let's all try to do better; I'll start with correcting myself...