This Is Why the Habit of Neurotypical Couples Hanging Out with Other Couples Is So Weird
They think it’s normal
Neurotypical people often think autistic people are weird. Well, autistic people feel the same way about neurotypical people.
I think neurotypical couples often have strange lifestyles. I felt reluctant to start a serious relationship with a neurotypical person. One of the reasons was that I worried that they might force me to participate in the weird neurotypical relationship patterns.
Luckily I’m now married to a fellow Aspie. So, I won’t have to worry about getting involved in the weird habits of neurotypical couples.
This is why the habit of neurotypical couples hanging out with other couples is so weird.
Neurotypical couples form intense foursome relationships with other couples
Many neurotypical couples form intense foursome relationships with other couples. They do that even if they’re not polygamous or members of a swinger’s club. I’ve always found this neurotypical habit so weird.
You even see this strange habit in TV commercials. In commercials, the neurotypical foursomes play video games and guessing games. I suppose that’s what they do in real life too. These commercials are supposed to be funny and relatable. I find them weird and alienating.
If the couples consist of two straight couples, the women are typically besties. And the guys are too. Then, they all four hang out together. And they seem to do that all the time. They have game nights, sleepovers, and vacations. It looks like the foursomes spend more time together than the couples have one-on-one time.
Some people don’t even hang out with only one couple. A group of people called seekers actively seek new friend couples.
Even the idea of spending time with one couple seems exhausting to me. But some people have multiple couple friends!
Neurotypical people have a need to “combine” their relationships
Neurotypical people have this weird need to “combine” all their relationships. Maybe spending one-on-one time with their partner is not enough. Or perhaps they can’t spend any time away from their partner. So, they have to drag their significant other to meet their friends. And then, they create these foursome relationships.
I wonder if this habit has something to do with neurotypical people wanting to compare themselves to others. Maybe they need to “mirror” their relationship to other people’s relationships.
I’m only guessing here. I have no idea why neurotypical couples love hanging out with other pairs so much.
I don’t mean that you shouldn’t meet your partner’s family and friends. I think it’s normal to invite your partner to family gatherings or your friend’s wedding.
The weirdness begins when a couple starts hanging out with another couple. It’s no longer about meeting your partner’s friends. It’s like your partner’s friends must become your friends too. I don’t understand why. Even if you’re in a relationship, I think you can still have your individual friends.
Some neurotypical people seem to find double dating weird too
Even some neurotypical people seem to find the habit of hanging out with other couples weird.
I found this article called “Why Only Hanging Out With Other Couples When You’re In A Relationship Is Toxic”.
The article warns about the downsides of double dating. According to the blog post, double dating can cause competition. You might also lose your sense of self and forget about your single friends.
It seems double dating is not so harmless, after all.
I’m not saying hanging out with other couples is “wrong”. As long as you don’t harm anyone, all kinds of lifestyles are fine by me.
But to me, many habits that are considered ”normal” seem weird. Double dating is one of the habits of neurotypical people that I find hard to understand. I don’t see what’s enjoyable about it.
Even weirder than the habit itself is the fact that it’s a norm. You can tell the double dating habit is a norm because it’s presented as a norm. We see couples hanging out with other pairs on TV shows and commercials.
As an autistic person, I see these TV friend couples as another reminder that I am different from the norm.
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About the author
Kirsty Kendall
MA in literature. Writer, unicorn lover, snail mom. I write about autism, business, life… Buy me a coffee: https://ko-fi.com/kkendall
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