The Truth About Healing From Betrayal
Time helps, but owning your reality is where it starts
There’s no easy answer that will bring comfort to this question. Betrayal is the worst action you can do against a loved one or one you “say” you love. I’m still a firm believer if you cheat, you never love your partner. I got so sick of hearing that I was “the one, her home, the love of her life” it began to make me feel nauseous.
I was, was her “one,” and if I felt like “home” to her in our hugs, then why cheat? The simple answer is she is disordered in some ways. It wasn’t just the cheating. It was her flat-out delusional life she lived, that and the excessive gaslighting.
For me, I chased and chased. I wanted to believe every lie she told me, so much so, I ignored my gut and intuition. It is so difficult when a relationship develops on lies. It can be heartbreaking when someone does this.
I had an “ah-ha” moment the other day while talking to a friend. Think about it. Most likely, they cheat on everyone they date. Of course, she does; she will even date her own family. She doesn’t care who she dates as long as she doesn’t have to sit alone. If that means stringing along 3–4 guys, so be it, no sweat, she does it. She has no morals, so everyone is fair game.
I’d say the majority that is cheated on are decent people. I read about it too often, it’s so easy these days, and that’s unfortunate. I know no one is perfect, but I never intentionally set out to hurt her, at least initially.
I sometimes said things to see if I could get a “reaction” out of her. I wanted to know if she cared a little, but it always backfired on me because when you date a cold-hearted asshole, there is nothing you can say or do to force them to care or at least show it. They will use and abuse anyone in their path.
But the minute someone else or something comes along of more interest to them, and they will treat you in the most horrible of ways. They will show it when they “need” something. Then, when you react to their abuse, they will use it against you.
So, what you do is you go out on your porch, balcony, park, or wherever. Take a blanket, some tea, a book, maybe some music. Enjoy yourself, breathe the air and look around and think of your possibilities.
THEN! Just think, that poor sucker that just landed your asshole ex thinks he hit the jackpot! Because they are being fed the same bullshit lines about “soul mates and twin flames” and the “feeling of home” as they did to you! They are living the rose-colored glasses life. Remember, leopards don’t change their spots, and your ex the leopard.
Let karma run its course, and it will happen, trust me even if you aren’t witnessing it. It will happen.
While they relationship hop chasing and cheating, you will find a person meant for you, not some manipulative, lying cheating asshole. No matter what they tell you. Once you do your inner work and accept the cheating had nothing to do with you and everything to do with them, progress can begin.
And trust me. That asshole knows they messed up when they keep cycling through weirdo after weirdo, and you were their “kind of weirdo.”
Cheaters cycle from person to person, leaving a trail of destruction chasing what they already had. They pursue relationships, booze, and titles while portraying a life of purity to the outsiders looking in. But it is never enough for them. They will never fill that empty pit of horror they have in their life. No one knows the true them unless you are one of the unfortunate ones to get pulled into their web of deceit.
They will end up regretting it, not you. You still have a chance; they don’t. They are the cheater; you aren’t.