The one way to fix corrupted motivation

I'm no psychologist or a researcher but I found a lot of my friends and colleagues (and frankly, myself) in these situations many times.

How come that some motivation works and some don't? Why the same people who did pursue some of their end goals, some goals didn't hit?

No need to wait till the end of this article, I'll tell you what I found.

If you don't love the process (of getting to your end goal), you won't reach it. Unless you are this unbelievable human being who is able to suck up everything unpleasant and just keep pushing.

Take sport. Probably all of us want to look fit and slim. We are able to clearly picture ourselves with this "perfect" body. Our motivation is strong. But here are still way too many companies that are thriving on selling fat-burning pills that clearly don't work. I tried to go to the gym, going for daily jogging to a park, swim, play tennis. Which of these do you think that actually stuck with me till today?

Well if you know me, you would know that it's swimming and tennis actually did. Why? Because I love it. I love to swim in the pool. I love the water surrounding my body. I love the sensation when I'm pushing through. I love the smell of chlorine. I love every minute of it. Ok, maybe except the one moment when you're getting to the cold water at first.

Same with tennis. I genuinely love to play. I'm excited for every minute while I'm playing. I'm not booking courts with the idea of "doing a sport in order to get fit and skinny" but actually to play. What keeps me playing three times a week is the actual moment on the court. I actually just love the process.

On the contrary, I hate jogging. I don't get you, people who love to run. I tried, many times. At times, I stick with it for months. But I hated it. The only satisfaction I got out of it was the moment when I finished and felt the sweet feeling of accomplishment. But then I also realized that that's too small of a reward to continue. I hated putting on the running shoes, I hated my jogging Spotify list, I hated the beginning of the run, as well as I, hated every minute of the jog. And I also hated every day when I didn't go jogging because I felt the guilt of being lazy.

If you see yourself in this, just find the sport you love doing. No matter what your end goal is. Forget any end goal. There is none! Simon (Sinek) says that's the infinite game. There is no end. And if you find any, there is again another milestone you will want to achieve. It's a neverending thing. So if you don't love the process, don't-do-it. Find something else that keeps you happy while you are in the process of doing it.

Alright, we covered sport. Let's stay move to nutrition. How many times have you failed a diet? Why? Same thing! If your motivation was to lose weight (even if you had a specific number of pounds/kgs to lose), how was the experience for you? Counting calories, eating untasty food, plain salads, feeling hungry after a protein shake.

We are back on the infinite game. There is no end. It's a neverending process. It's all about creating a sustainable lifestyle. And you must love it while you are doing it. Otherwise, it's not sustainable. Do you hate plain salads? Well, learn how to make tasty salads (like I love to put avocado and tortilla chips into my salads, bosh!). Do you feel like a cake? Eat the freakin' cake! Do you feel like having a slice of pizza for breakfast, eat the pizza for breakfast. Well, not the whole one but you get my point, right.

Alright, now. Business. A career.

I used to hate the question 'Where do you see yourself in 10 years?". I felt like I need to share my career end goal. "I want to be a manager." Because c'mon, I need to be perceived as an ambitious individual with a drive, right? Who wants to hire a person who says "I don't know. I kind of like what I'm doing." But now as I'm looking at it, that's a great mindset. Yes, it's great to have some kind of milestones and goals which I want to achieve. It would help me to lead action steps throughout the time in order to grow. To achieve my goal. I have to love the process. I have to love the job itself.

What if I get stuck in a hated job for years just to become a manager? And once I do become a manager, then what. How long would I be happy? Till the end of times? Hardly.

Summary

In whatever you do. In whatever you want, make sure that you love the process. That your main goal, your main motivation is to be doing that thing. And if you forget the end goal for a minute, would you be still doing what you're doing? Because if not, your motivation is corrupted by a goal that is perishable. It will be much harder to achieve it. And even if you do, it'll pass.

Do keep your goals. Cherish them. Plan them. But spend time planning the most enjoyable way to achieve them. So in case your goal changes or vanishes, you still have the process you love.