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The Joy of Having Friends

For the first time in my life, I have more than one friend

By Tricia HPublished 3 years ago 3 min read
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I have three friends right now who are local, which means we get together and do things (of course COVID has messed with that). I have a couple other friends who don’t live near me, as well.

This may sound like a weird statement to make, but this is the first time in my life that I’ve had more than one friend at a time. There have been times when I didn’t have any “real” friends at all—I’ve had acquaintances who were a little more than that, but not the kind of person I’d ever call and say “you want to do something this weekend?” I’ve also had work friends that I never saw outside of the job. But not necessarily “friends” friends.

It’s a weird feeling, this having multiple friends. Good, but so unusual for me that I sometimes don’t know what to do or think. To be totally honest, I’ve had moments when we were all together and I looked around at them and wondered if the moment was real. Or if all of them really wanted me there.

On the flip side, I’ve also had moments where I looked at the three of them laughing and talking and having fun, and nearly cried with gratitude that I was there with them, that they were part of my life, and that I was laughing and talking, too.

Our dogs brought us together, and some of our activities involve the dogs in one way or another. But a good many of the things we do aren’t dog related.

As a group we’ve gone to champagne brunches at a local wine bar, we solved mystery boxes, we went to Game Theory and played games for hours, and we’ve had game nights at our house.

We’re hysterical. When the four of us are together we laugh so much it makes our stomach hurt sometimes. We’re loud. Conversations get going and we talk over each other, trying to make sure our version of the “truth” is put out there. Almost all of our conversations end in laughter. Most of our times together end in hugs.

To be honest, on occasion I get scared that it won’t last. That one or another of them will drift away and the dynamic will fall apart without her, or that the group without her just won’t survive. I’m especially concerned about this because of the COVID lockdown. Can our friendships survive?

I try not to think about it, and when I do, not to focus on the negative aspect, but it’s hard.

I wonder if my previous experience of not having a lot of friends would make it easier for me if I were to lose these friends. My real thought, though, is that having had friends, of being part of such a wonderful group of women, of finally “belonging” would make the loss of it—in almost any form—devastating.

So whenever I realize how long it’s been since I’ve seen someone, I try to think instead that we’ll have a lot to talk about when we get together again. We’ll be so happy to be hanging out again that the absence won’t even be an issue. We’ll have a drink (or two), play a game, pet the dogs, and laugh just like before.

That being said, we’re not totally away from each other. Three of us get together to walk the dogs at a local park every now and again (the other person works a lot and can’t go), which we can do without breaking COVID restrictions (the park’s paths are wide and we’re able to stay distant). It’s wonderful to see them, even if it isn’t all four of us, and even if it isn’t like it used to be.

Having friends is great. It’s wonderful. It’s fun. It’s good for me.

And it was worth the wait.

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About the Creator

Tricia H

Dog mom, Texan, amateur photographer,crafter, reader, writer.

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