The Gifting of The ID

ID- According to Freud, the id is the source of all psychic energy, making it the primary component of personality

Before I begin, I would like to mention that I am no expert of all things. It is simply impossible to be all knowing, we only know what we've been exposed to. But that doesn't mean we don't deserve to be heard. Receiving a perspective or an experience is a blessing, it carries knowledge. It just shouldn't be your only source of information.

I only know, what I know.

We've entered a new year together. I am not sure if it is just me but it has been an extremely eventful last year. I have learned so much about myself mentally and spiritually, but life was moving at faster pace than I was functioning at.

At some point it became difficult to accomplish mundane task around my apartment, for myself and my loved ones. It is still kinda is right now but .

Eventually it became sort of comical. I began to narrator my life. Literally every step I took, every move I made, I said it to myself in my head. I was Present. I was there in that specific moment living out every action. It was as if I was in a movie. Pure presence.

Since every saying wants to say "life is a rollercoaster", I started to decline. Being in the present moment made me less anxious and tense. I was feeling ever stressor in my body bubble and harden. Aching every morning and night as if I was chopping wood all day. I was tired. Still am

Pushing myself back up the rollercoaster, the New Year is here. I am here. We've collectively have made it through one of the hardest years in our life. I would need at least two hundred thousand pages to describe whatever it was that we encountered last year.

It only showed the resilience us BIPOC carry constantly everyday. To all the beautiful lives taken last year, I pray that the universe has shined its light on you and you are resting in peace.

A beautiful image of art plastered on the street, food being given out by the bag and the community relying on each other. The doors of churches have lines stretched to the street of people so grateful for the groceries. We provide that for each other. We as a community organized and created spaces for families and individuals to be able to survive another year. What a beautiful image. My Queer community making such an impact, standing in the front lines, fighting the same old fight. What a beautiful image.

I am grateful to see our greatness, my greatness unfold this year. We are powerful on our and together. I am proud of who I am about to be.

Who I am now.

A Black, Muslim, Gender-nonconforming, Non-Binary Celestial being.