The Biggest One Ever

Concentration. Are you ready? If so, let's go. Starting with names of . . . I have no idea why I opened with this. It's a game we played when we were kids.

My Week

Again again again. I am trying to shift my perspective. You have to know that I genuinely am. And when it comes to one single verbal attack by a lonely old anti-Semite, I can handle that.

As I sit and write this, dark clouds are drifting in from the east.

But now that I have returned to work, the balance has shifted, and I have a lot rolling towards me. It feels like I'm playing Donkey Kong from the bottom of my career.

I am also fully aware that if I remained with my previous profession, then I would currently be unemployed AND uninsured. And the multitude of reasons I left, I allowed to happen to me. I'm not claiming fault here, just a simple dose of reality,

Since returning to work this past week, I have run very little, and I have eaten badly. I am allowing THAT all to happen, because I believe it is time to let certain things go, short term. And I know that I can do a lot worse for myself than Gardein vegan chicken nuggets and Amy's frozen burritos, but they are not really a health food.

Okay, Now We (Re)Begin

I believe I will be on this road to recovery for the rest of my life, if I'm lucky.

Remember Michael Moore's 1997 documentary "The Big One?" I remember having seen it, and being thankful that I was working for a dead communist who believed all of the works of William Shakespeare should be free and accessible to everyone. I had spent the previous seven years working in television, especially for news agencies, which had a major white(male) infestation. It was kind of gross.

Well, imagine me being pulled onto the dance floor, by the director of Bring In Da Noise, Bring In Da Funk, at the Belvedere Castle during an opening night party. I knew that I was surrounded by my people, and let the TV profession go.

In Big One, Michael Moore displays the lives of people who work on the ground floor of huge corporations. The disparity between them and their CEOs is disgusting. He predicts that at some point in the near future, we're all going to be working for the same company, hence the title. And here I am, twenty three years after storming the Castle with my dirty dance moves, and I am now working on the ground floor of the Biggest One Ever. I am not sure how that happened. There may have been some codependency going on, but I allowed it to happen.

And at this moment, the value of my mental health is in question.

Huh? Me? Am I not worth something to The Biggest One Ever? Apparently I am, but there is indeed a limit. Shame on me for committing a lifetime to the arts. I say that facetiously, sort of. My health wasn't worth anything to my previous employer. And then it was. But then they cut my hours, blamed the black president, and then claimed I wasn't working enough for them to care about my health.

So then it became the state of New York's responsibility to care about 100% of me. I was born here, educated here, got two college degrees here. And New York delivered.

But because I wasn't working enough hours to earn a living with my previous employer, I had to take on a second job to pay for my basic necessities. And between my two gigs, I was earning too much money to qualify for free healthcare. And the plans considered affordable with my income, were way too expensive.

When you read and hear about certain topics which don't directly apply to you, it becomes difficult to view basic human needs. My name is Karen Lichtman. I am 52 years old, and quite fit and healthy. I thankfully have very few health issues, however, I live with PTSD. While committing my life to the arts, I lost my boyfriend, mom, home and roommate during his successful suicide attempt, all within 18 months. I like to laugh, sing, blow bubbles, run, and explore every vegan opportunity this planet has to offer. My heart is open. I have been an actively voting citizen since 1986. I am the granddaughter of immigrants. My parents were born and raised in The Bronx. I recently lost a cousin, a dear actor friend, a theater acquaintance, and a childhood friend's father to COVID-19.

Now you have my face and my name.