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The 10 Curious Steps of Being Smitten With Someone

by Mathilde Clemence Personne 2 years ago in list · updated 3 months ago

Having a crush on someone makes you feel amazingly good, but that's not it...

Not only being smitten with someone makes you feel happy, but it also makes you feel powerful. Alas no, none of you is going to turn into any Marvel hero, but many of you still feel empowered. The truth is, even if you all think and behave differently in general, you all show similar attitudes when it comes time to interacting with that someone that you like. Lets check this out:

1. Attraction

You feel a kind of attraction to that someone, and you may not be able to explain the reason. The attraction that happens in a few seconds after having bumped into that someone for the first time, and this happens even if they don't match with your "type" in the first place. You don’t know anything about that someone, you don’t even know the sound of their voice, but you like something about their attitude.

2. Gazing

You keep looking at that someone—out of the corner of your eye, so you don’t look like a creep—and you can’t help it. You think you are being discreet when actually that someone notices you, because of your perseverance to watch them. That's when they start looking at you back if there is any mutual attraction.

3. Attention

Each time that someone stands in front of you, something about them catches your attention, something exciting. As a result, you start observing them. You don’t need to follow that someone with your eyes anymore, it sounds like a radar has been set up in your brain. You know where that someone is most of the time.

4. Hesitation

You wish you could muster the courage to approach that someone and say a word, a sentence, a greeting... anything as long as you say something. But this "anything" idea stops you from acting on it, just because of the fear of being judged and seen as a weirdo. You seem to be shy all of a sudden, even if that trait is not a part of your personality. You can finally hear that someone’s voice and the way they communicate with the others, the way they articulate their thoughts and ideas, and it’s enough for you to get a deeper crush on them.

5. Daydreaming

You start daydreaming about the different interactions you could have with that someone, and what the two of you could say to each other. You even think you're getting crazy by doing that, but your instinct tells you it would be a great match—while your mind is playing with your imagination.

6. Talking

You end up talking with that someone—f.i.n.a.l.l.y—which creates some confusion in your mind. You feel excited to engage in conversation with them, but you can't ignore the negative feeling that lets you think you are not interesting enough to keep them attracted. You want to impress that someone with your words, your thoughts, your ideas, and your status. Even if you have a natural self-confidence, it feels like you are losing it in front of them. You find that someone interesting because you realize you can broach any topics with them. You obviously don’t mind listening to what they may tell you, and without them knowing it, they are successful in keeping you entertained.

7. Terms

It becomes natural to call that someone by using pet names or nicknames. You are (always) nice to them, you never argue, you laugh with them, you love teasing them, you listen to their words, you give them advice, you support them, you become their shoulder to cry on—and you are there for them. That’s when your relationship with that someone sounds unique on your mind, and you feel like you have never had that feeling before.

8. Emotions

You want to be able to keep in touch with that someone sometimes, every time, any time, all the time. That's when you ask for their number, and find them on social medias. You take the plunge; you send the first text to that someone, then you start exchanging messages a bit, a bit more, a lot, a lot more, till you reach the "every single day" level. You can’t help smiling when you see that someone’s number on your screen. You can’t help feeling energized when you cross their paths. You can’t help feeling excited when you meet them, and deep down, you wish you could be closer to that someone to create a strong connection with them. You can feel it, it’s no longer just a matter of physical attraction. You surely want to get to know them better, but something is holding you back: the fear of not being on the same page with that someone.

9. Closeness

You don't mind having physical contact with that someone, even if you are not a touchy-feely person in the first place. You especially love their hugs, and you can’t help touching them when you talk to them, or walk next to them. You learn how to feel comfortable with that someone being around you, but you do know the bashfulness feeling that remains between the two of you is a deep mark of respect. Don't worry about it though, it will vanish at some point; the bashfulness, not the respect... at least, I hope that for you!

10. Addiction

You wish you could see that someone several times a day and spend hours talking, laughing, and sharing moments with them. You begin to think about that someone a bit, a bit more, a lot, a lot more, till you reach the "all the time" level. You can feel the intensity of different emotions when that someone stands in front of you, and you eventually realize they have a magic touch on you and your mood: they brighten your day each time, every time, any time, all the time you see them.

Bref, you have a crush on that someone who has a name and you know it very well—otherwise, why would you be here? And yes, I'm pretty sure you have been thinking of them all along that list. But here's a sneaky truth; if you nodded at the points you read just above, your crush may no longer be just a simple crush—and you know you should do something about it. Was it a trick? Yes, no, maybe so. The bright side is, you have a better idea of what you really think and feel about that someone, and if I were you, I surely won’t let go of them. In addition, if your gut tells you to give it a try, that's all you need to do. Try not to overthink or be afraid, because everything is going to be okay and remember this–no matter what.

Until next time,



Mathilde Clemence Personne

French Collector, Creator and Writer based in New York City —


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