Thank you Melissa, for Sharing your love for Talia Joy Castellano

A favorite piece by my friend , Melissa Hevenor

https://vocal.media/psyche/remembering-talia-joy-castellano-aka-taliajoy18

Her love for Talia, was so touching to me that I felt a pull to watch her videos ...to get to know her.

I vaguely remember watching the episode of Long Island Medium about her , (A few years prior to connecting to Melissa online and becoming friends💜- I now affectionately call her Sissy💜)

I remember watching the LIM show featuring Talia, being in tears. Thought was at the time , 'I'm glad I don't like make-up too much. Else I could have watched Talia's videos- I'd feel attached to her- then be saddened and angered by her passing. Nah, good thing I'm not...'

However, I came to care for Melissa (Supporting her- GFM, about the time we connected on FB, to help ease financial stress of her illness, leukemia making working to cover her rent a struggle),just wanted to relieve some stress SO SHE COULD FOCUS ON HEALING & maintaining the strongest sense of happiness & peace she was bestowed.

My grandmother died of leukemia - After a few decades long battle. I have always had a fear of living beyond age 40 ( I'll be 41 years old the August ).

Something always lurking in the back of my mind. Cancer. No! Scary...I don't want to suffer & die with this like both my grandmothers. My mom's mother was only just shy of age 45 when she passed: About a year and a half before I was born. So the fear-driven plan -from my early 20's ... still surfaces regularly. YEARNING, pressing, race again time, thought: 'Hurry, Get to your purpose. Get done. Get out of here! { Let life be over BEFORE you're 40...Maybe you can escape this same tragic fate?' }

**Share my b-day with Whitney Houston BTW: August 9th... And Talia's b-day happens to be August 18th- Our birthdays are 9 days apart. Cool link!**

I'm still here! I connected to Talia anyways... I'm blessed for it! I saw her radiant smile, elegant grace, contagious supper high positive energy. Always choosing to live and have the most fun-Silly, upbeat and a genuine being... heart of love; pure golden bright light. She radiated enough light to transmute the darkness of illness ravaging her own body AND be a beacon of light inspiring hope & courage for so many kids & adults world wide! I was never wild about make-up. Of course when I got some as a holiday gift as a 14 year old, I was proud to have some( That was something normalizing, something teenagers did). So, I could feel like a regular teenager - Not just someone in a wheelchair who never did activities like go to; nor have any friend from school over, for a sleepover or birthday parties.*Except for maybe 3 occasions in elementary school* Didn't meet a girlfriend at the mall , the movies or the library to study. Most of the time we had no car to get anywhere & my momma couldn't lift me or carry me to the car after I was over the age of 6 yrs old anyway! Money tight too. So, I went to school ( missed a lot of days); had kids in my mainstreamed class- some nice, some mean, most said hi, but ignored me. In a way I didn't mind. Didn't have time to play around or socialize. Took all my attention to 'try' to keep up with the pace of the lessons in class!

I also would've much rather hung out with my teachers & been friends with them: who were kind to me and I had great respect for them. Sometimes, my sister's friends would sleepover. They'd show me some kindness & attention. We'd spend a lot of time with our cousins. They'd eventually all run off & play with my sister though. Leaving me behind to enjoy the company of my friends ever constant, readily available- Music! Majickal ,beautiful happiness and comfort. My friends and chosen family sang to me over the radio waves. Come to hang out, serving as pleasant companions as voices through my speakers!

Feeling like an outgoing, adventurous teenager... It was sort of a mystery how to be one! Then, as I said, Melissa ... I knew she adored and supported Talia. One day watching one of Melissa's videos, she spoke of her love of Talia & her way of honoring her by supporting Talia's Legacy Children's Cancer Foundation... Asking us to please help honor her---BUY SOME MERCH---Support the kids (She was wearing one of the many shirts she purchased). Ok, Melissa if I can make you happy... I'll think about it But, I think I should at least watch a video to get to know Talia first before I buy some merch or donate...

Please check here if interested >>> https://www.taliaslegacy.org/. Thank You!

Watched video of Talia....her fun personality was so over-the-top. The fact that she was battling cancer was almost completely cast in the background! I just watch her....DAMN SHE'S COOL! Her make-up looks just brought enhanced attention to her inner-spirit.

I shed some tears for her pain. She never let it steal her light ,creativity or passion. Never let it rob her of her compassion to help other kids like her suffering through cancer *the younger ones especially*... She wanted them to feel beautiful and feel like the had a friend, inspire playfulness with glitter and rainbow colors in make-up to help them smile!

I can say, She DID THIS FOR ME (Though I was 19 years old before she was born) She made my laugh & smile Surprisingly I felt more Joy watching her than I thought, I thought I'd cry for the beautiful, bright being who was no longer with us ( I did some) . Instead I smile , laugh ENJOY her presence forever captured in videos.

I think of Talia as being my representative stand-in for the teenage experience/friend. I call on her on behalf of my friend Melissa to give her light , love & healing. I call on her to re-direct my fear of cancer thoughts, I call on her to give love & comfort to kids I have since come to know on FB with cancer - I have come to care about- I'm almost sure SHE brought them to my orbit - So I could check in on and buy them toys & things to help them smile!

I thought Talia was such a beautiful being full of love that ...

I ASKED HER A VERY SPECIAL FAVOR - two years ago today!

June 3, 2019 ~ My Kitty I had untill his 15th birthday passed away.

I was so distraught... I wanted so much to heal him & keep him with me. I COUDN'T LET HIM GO! I held on so tight, that I didn't want to believe he was gone! Through his life I WAS NOT always good to him. I was full of anger . Fear, in control freak rage, that I often took out on him! HE DIDN'T DESERVE this... I sadly didn't make huge efforts to change my behavior- UNTILL the last few months of his life. So WANTED to do better by him. Give him the love & proper respect he so deserved...Too blinded by fear-induced rage to give him this---EVEN in the end; I TRIED but failed!

So, The only thing I could think of that I could do to make amends: I CALLED ON TALIA! Didn't even know if she liked cats. She loves her Bella. I call her, Bella puppy! I cried to Talia...Thinking IF ANYONE COULD SHOW my cat love, play with him, give him happiness & loads of comfort & cuddles , it would be Talia! Because goodness! I could think of no other soul so perfectly suited, so full of love, that could give him all the love he deserves! So, I asked her to come for him & take him home. Comfort him ,spoil him... Asking her to (along side my Mattie pie *His elected daddy*) please care for him - BE HIS GUARDIAN- love him untill I can come home to be with him AND the rest of you! ****And to please look after little Charley girl. Play with her : be little mermaids swimming, give her love & pretzel pieces. Playing dress-up perfume & make-up fun, Hats & shades!****

I dedicate this piece to Melissa & Talia who teach me about love & true strength that springs from it. Thank you! Love you XOXO

Live in joy! But, when I can't find it in my own life- Try to bring it to others, help them smile & play. Help them to forget their burdens- NO ONE SHOULD CARRY BURDENS...They should ONLY KNOW DANCE FOR JOY!

PS: I know I have called on Talia for support...

But once a few yeas ago ... I invited her to come hang out with me & my sister. My sister & I have been to see Theresa Caputo-AKA 'The Long Island Medium'-live 3 times. *This latest trip has been rescheduled three times due to pandemic* Knowing of the show-Talia & her family's episode...

Getting ready for that night , I said , "Hey TALIA , You wanna come hang out with Theresa with us?" Was enjoying the show wondering if Talia would come hang out. When we come to the end of the SHOW! Theresa referencing stories from her book, brings up Talia! My heart skipped & I burst into tears! My interpretation, Yay! Talia DID COME HANG OUT!

Hoping she knows she's always welcome to hang out whenever we have fun at T, Time . Fun TIME! Me and my 3 T's