"Caught in the labyrinth of the mind."
I often question myself why things aren't working out as they should be. I examine my actions and try to articulate my thoughts to gain clarity. However, after some time, I realized that the reason for the problem was not me. It was my partner's habit of giving me the silent treatment, which was a manipulative game he enjoyed playing.
This game was both demeaning and hurtful, causing me emotional distress and anguish time and time again. until I decided to put a stop to it. Let me elaborate.
I am a caring partner who always prioritizes my significant other's happiness. My partner expected me to fulfill his every desire without questioning him, and I complied. In the bedroom, he positioned me to suit his needs and didn't want me to speak, and I silently complied with his wishes, fearing his anger. He was the one who paid the bills and took care of me, so I didn't want to upset him.
He compelled me to close down my business by insisting that women should stay at home. He expected me to cook, clean, and manage the household while he worked and paid the bills. It seemed like a way for him to control my every move.
Despite the bad times, we had there were good moments too. We shared laughs and made each other smile. But he could also be cruel, causing me to feel sad and cry. Once, he expressed his hatred for weak women.
He constantly perceived me as weak and incapable of effective communication. Whenever he made a mistake, he would blame me and I would try to fix it myself. Even though I didn't do anything wrong, he made me feel like I did.
Whenever I tried to talk to him, he would remain silent for hours as he did not like discussing his emotions. He would also ignore my phone calls and messages, thinking he had gained control over my speech. He even complimented me on my appearance when I refrained from speaking.
Mason disliked when I defended myself, as he would say things that I disagreed with, and I would refuse to bow down. I grew frustrated as he attempted to teach me how to speak correctly with his ostentatious voice, but I knew he was a narcissist.
Because of how much he enjoyed doing this, I decided not to speak as much as I desired. Other times, he would begin speaking, and I would wait for him to finish. I was only permitted to talk when spoken to. He treated me as though I were a child who should be seen and not heard.
When asked why I stayed with him, I tell them that I loved him, but I knew he was manipulating me. He mentally and emotionally abused me, although I believed he cared.
Mason was capable of controlling everything that happened in our lives, even what I ate and drank. He would order for me when we went out, as though I were incapable of doing so on my own. I paid him no mind and remained silent.
He would often alter his voice in response to what he did not approve of, and I would comply with him. He also knew how to manipulate me without touching me.
Some may say I was vulnerable or insecure about remaining with him, but he was incredibly skilled at getting into my heart and mind. The sex was great, but he became unpredictable one day and grew more aggressive, causing the sex to become brutal. I learned to mentally remove myself from the room while my body remained.
Mason would build me up, only to tear me down repeatedly. He never felt guilty for hurting me and would make me question my self-worth.
Although he had not committed to me or made me his wife, he still wanted me and did not want any other man to have me. He would use his status to make me feel as though he was saving me like I was a charity, and he was giving back to the community.
I began to change my appearance and attend the gym to improve myself, hoping it would make him happy, but mentally and physically, it took a toll on my body. He would threaten me that if I ever left him It would be wrong for me. He liked being in control.
After leaving him, I decided to seek therapy. My therapist warned me about Mason's toxic behavior and suggested that I stay away from him. Despite months passing without any contact, he unexpectedly arrived at my doorstep with a card and package. Now I'm wondering whether I should open it.
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About the Creator
Writing has been my passion for as long as I can remember. I bring a fresh perspective to the table, and my unique voice is worth exploring. Readers can expect to witness growth and development in my writing.
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