Putting on the Hat

by Maria Ayala 10 months ago in advice

May I Remind You...

Putting on the Hat

I love Halloween. Halloween is all about the supernatural. I love all the colors. The colors of the leaves falling, and all the colors I can paint my nails with: Orange and black, mainly. I even remember the smell of the candy wrappers as a kid, trick or treating in La Mesa. I love how my intuition has gotten stronger over the years. I feel more connected to other's who have passed on during this time. I know when people are lying to me. I can read people's minds, when they walk past me. I can do this all the time, not just on Halloween.

I know when someone has evil intentions towards me. Evil likes to disguise itself. I will always weed it out. I won't tolerate those who want to make fun of me for being fat either. I know why they do it. They are insecure, and more often than not, they are cowards. They won't challenge me directly. They won't insult me directly either. They are much to covert for honesty. They will indirectly throw insults my way. Naturally, they insult my intelligence. That is what I hate the most. But, like I said before, I know why they do it. I pose a threat to them. They can't stand that. My spirit irritates their demons. Like true sociopaths, they seek to insult me, hurt me in some way. But I know what motivates them. My energy is real. They can't stand real. My energy is pure. Their energy is filled with an agenda that only serves them.

Halloween is about taking off the mask. As an empath, I take of the masks of my fakes out there. Their true colors, start to run through and the stain becomes obvious to everyone else. That is what I do. Fake people can't stand it. They will stop and nothing to humiliate me in front of as many people as possible. They enjoy making others suffer. It is more than just a hobby for them. Being cruel defines their whole personality.

More often than not, people bully me because they think that because I'm fat, I'm also a pushover. You can't tell me what to do. I won't leave the table just because you feel uncomfortable. If you don't like it, you can leave. I won't. There is a wonderful saying in Spanish, which explains this concept perfectly: No me cuesta sacar las unas. This roughly translates to: It doesn't take much effort on my part to show you my nails.

I don't do anything to anyone. But if you mess with me, you will regret it. Why be mean to me? You don't me as your enemy. Just be nice. If that is too much to ask, then you have failed at being human. Check yourself, before I do!! Don't think that just because I'm fat, I'm also a pushover. Don't underestimate me.

That is the biggest mistake you can make. Don’t think I will feel obligated to be nice to you, if you are always mean to me. Don’t think that I will forget all the mean things you say. Don’t think I will forget how you started rumors about me, and spread them, like a mujersuela spreads her legs. Don’t think that I care how you feel if you have been nothing but cruel to me. Don’t think that I will help you, if you cast me aside, when I was most in need. Don’t think that I will keep that information to myself. I will tell everyone I know how evil you are. I will let everyone know what your true colors are. Don’t think for one second that I think I deserve to be treated like a rag doll. Because I won’t. If you underestimate me, this will be your downfall!!

Maria Ayala
Maria Ayala
Read next: 'Chocolate Kisses'
Maria Ayala

I started writing poetry at age 12. I am from San Diego, California. My birthday is on May 30th. Please contribute to my blog. I also create videos for the Tom Ellis Fan Page on facebook. Looking forward to watching Lucifer on Netflix!!

See all posts by Maria Ayala