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Losing Your Temper During An Argument Is Never Worth It

Here's how to stay calm instead...

By Robert Who WritesPublished 4 months ago 4 min read
Losing your temper is never worth it

It's easy to lose your temper during an argument when you feel like you're being attacked or wronged. But letting your emotions take over is never the right move.

In fact, it often makes the situation worse. Make an effort to stay calm and collected during an argument.

The following seven tips can help you stay calm so you can resolve the issue without resorting to name-calling or other forms of verbal abuse.

1. Take A Step Back And Breathe

This is probably the most important tip on this list. When you're frustrated or angry, it's easy to get caught up in the moment and say things you'll regret later.

So, take a step back (literally) and take a few deep breaths. This will help clear your head and allow you to think more clearly about how you want to handle the situation.

2. The Other Person Is Just As Upset As You Are

Recognize that the other person is probably just as upset as you are. When we're in the heat of an argument, it's easy to forget that the other person is human too.

They might feel just as frustrated and angry as you are, so try to empathize with their position.

Listen to what they are saying. It can be tempting to tune out when someone is yelling at you, but it's critical to try and listen to what they say to understand what is bothering them.

After you understand the other person's viewpoints, it will be simpler to discover a solution that benefits both of you.

Use "I" statements during an argument

3. Use "I" Statements During An Argument

When arguing, try to use "I" statements instead of "you" statements. For example, instead of saying, "You always forget to take the trash out," you could say, "I feel disappointed when I come home and see that the trash hasn't been taken out."

This small change can significantly affect how your argument is received. When you use "I" statements, you are taking responsibility for your feelings and experiences, and you are less likely to place blame on the other person.

As a result, the other person is more likely to be open to hearing your side of the story. So next time you find yourself in an argument, remember to use "I" statements. It could make a significant difference in the outcome.

4. Address The Issue At Hand, Not The Person

One of the essential skills in any relationship is the ability to handle conflict constructively.

When an argument arises, it is vital to stay focused on the issue at hand and avoid getting caught up in personal attacks.

This can be difficult, especially when tempers are flared, but it is essential to maintain a respectful dialogue.

By keeping the conversation focused on the problem, you can work together to reach a solution.

5. Don't Take Things Personally

Sometimes people say things in the heat of the moment that they don't mean. If you take things personally, your anger will only grow.

Make an effort to see things from the point of view of the other person and understand that they might not be mad at you specifically; they might be infuriated in general.

Keep your cool during an argument

6. Keep Your Cool

Keep your cool, and don't stoop to their level by yelling back or name-calling. This will only escalate the situation and make it harder to resolve.

If they're yelling, keep your voice calm and collected—this will throw them off and can potentially diffuse the problem altogether.

7. Avoid Using Ultimatums Or Threats

Ultimatums and threats may seem like an effective way to get what you want during an argument, but in reality, they are likely to do more harm than good.

For one thing, ultimatums and threats tend to escalate the conflict, making it harder to reach a resolution.

Furthermore, ultimatums can create resentment and mistrust, damaging the relationship long after the argument is over.

So whenever you are in a heated argument, remember to avoid ultimatums and threats. Instead, try to stay calm and focused on finding a solution that will satisfy both parties.


Arguments are never fun, but they are a part of life. The next time you have an argument, try using these tips to stay calm instead of losing your temper.

Remember, losing your temper will only worsen things—so breathe deeply, listen carefully, and keep calm no matter what!


About the Creator

Robert Who Writes

I like to share advice on relationships & self-improvement. My interests include reading, psychology, personal development, learning foreign languages.

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