Literally, shut up and listen!

People, people, people. I'm shaking my head at this moment as I start this because it seems that every time I get an epiphany, I start to be more aware of it and then see many examples of it. In this case, it is that most people or terrible, horrible listeners. I mean, they don't even get out of their own head before they roll out of bed (I made a rhyme!). Communication is always 2 ways, no matter what anyone tells you. Verbal or nonverbal, someone is doing the "talking" and the other is doing the "listening" in any scenario. Seriously, think about it. It's not communication if there is nobody or nothing around to perceive your signals. Have you been in a conversation where it just feels like the other party cuts you off, talks over you, and no matter how many attempts you make to clarify your point, you end up feeling unheard? Well, you aren't crazy! You're just living in the society of instant gratification that is available on an individual level to every since person who owns a phone or computer with access to, pretty much anything they want.

You! Yeah, you there! The one with cotton in your ears! Do you have any idea how much you miss when you don't listen to someone and I mean truly listen to the words, tones, body language and emotions coming out of the other person? There is so much more to interpret when you actually pay attention and try to understand. Anyone who has learned to make a sentence can spew one out of their mouth, but it takes an observant, non-egocentric, and attentive person to be able to interpret all the communication that comes along with those words to get the full message. A lot of times, all it takes is for you to simply SHUT. YOUR. MASTICATOR. By convention and basic manners, when someone talks, your ears and eyes should be open while your mouth is shut. Seriously, it is a lot of work to keep the three of them running at all times. This is how we control dumping our verbal garbage on someone and improve our image by not coming across as ignorant and self-serving. Speaking before getting all the facts or trying to get a better grip of where the other person is coming from. Would you let a giraffe out into the same exhibit as a lion or would you give each their fair turn outside? It could end in a blood bath and it usually does, we just don't see the damage we've done when we regard someone else's thought as not worthy of our attention.

This is not just with personal conversations, either. It is way easier to be attentive to people we care about as opposed to a stranger, but it's all the same and could yield the same benefits to all involved in the conversation. That retail worker who is trying to explain to you why there was a delay in your order is trying to help you understand the issue so they can better assist you, it is not a blow to your ego or personal insult. Your inconvenience is not the fault of the individual who only wants to help. I know I feel more motivated to help an understanding person even more urgently than someone who can't let me finish explaining the issue as well as solution.

It will take some practice because, good grief, we haven't been without emails, texts, voicemails, and other forms of delayed conversations in decades. This will be a tough habit to break, but the path to redemption is just as simple as taking your turn in conversation in tandem with someone else. No two mouths should be open at the same time making words.