It's better to learn to release the fear of rejection to connect with others

To authentically connect with others, try to take off the armor. Stop allowing the disguises of fear to disturb the human connections. Try to be less concerned about impressing others or worrying that we may say something wrong, and just be who we truly are. Those who accept the persons with flaws and all are real friends. They are the ones that will continue to care about you despite the mistakes you will make as time goes on. Love is accepting another if it is authentic.

Connections become rare nowadays so, it is obvious for a person to get afraid from the rejection and loss of relations. The loving closeness with our spouses, the comfort, and support from a close friend, but to have these real connections, vulnerability should be shown. Being vulnerable is how we connect by sharing the good parts and the parts we don’t like to talk about. We have to learn to be brave to truly share our thoughts and feelings with others.

Fear of being judged harshly by sharing intimate thoughts and feelings is itself a fear. That fear includes being blamed, attacked, or shamed by those we care about and our negative side with pushing others away, instead of drawing them closer. We determine that since we feel bad and are ashamed of how we feel or what we did, others will to and therefore no longer love us.

Fear of rejection is the biggest impediment we face to choosing ourselves. This rejection fear dominates so much the personalities that it tries to compel us to stay away from the people but it is important to connect with people as well. Despite the fear of judgment, we have a more profound need to bond with others. Science has shown that our brains are wired for these personal connections. We don’t need a lot of them, but these special bonds are required so that we don’t feel all alone in the world. These special relationships provide a sense of comfort and protection that we desire in our lives.

Guarding our Self-Esteem

So, to be authentic, try to show who we are. But, we have experiences where doing so caused our feeling to be hurt. There were times when we were humiliated when we dared to share our thoughts and feelings. Or, we were teased for not being smart enough in a certain situation. These interactions from our past made us feel unworthy and therefore, we are now guarded when we meet new people.

Consequently, we try to alter ourselves into a person who is more acceptable to others. We conform to what society thinks is normal. We try to earn acceptance, respect, and love for being something we aren’t. Essentially, we are lying to ourselves and others. And if we are accepted, we still feel ashamed because we know we are being dishonest with others and ourselves.

Despite how we have been treated in the past, we are good enough. We are worthy of love and acceptance just as we are. You were born a unique individual. No one else on this planet is like you, so you really can’t compare yourself to anyone.

Protecting our Feelings

Revealing the hearts and emotions can be frightening. The past has shown us that sharing our feelings can cause rejection. So, we appease others by providing societal accepted responses instead of sharing our true frame of mind. By doing so, we don’t get closer to others; we end up more isolated.

Sometimes ego is considered a real danger in your feeling of getting hurt, and that is not necessarily true. Yes, being wounded by others’ words can affect you. It may lessen your self-worth, but it is not truly dangerous, like a tiger attacking you. The ego is meant to alert you to danger that is life-threatening, not hurt feelings.

Isolation and mindset can be altered, as we all can heal and forgive others. Forgiveness allows us to release the past so that we can move forward. This then leads to self-care, the process in which we nurture ourselves and for us to alter how we face the world. Changing our mindset allows us to see that everyone is different and therefore not everyone will respond like another. When we choose to treat everyone the same, we are connecting ourselves from authentic connections.

Releasing the Fear of Rejection

Suffering, underneath are the desperate efforts to be accepted, and it is our true self; the exposed, innocent, and unguarded authentic self. It takes mindfulness and self-care to encourage ourselves to be just as we were created to be and release the fear of rejection the ego holds on to.

We cannot abandon the egoistic mind, as it is an integral part of our being human. What we can do is to evaluate if the danger the ego reveals is genuine. Being embarrassed is not life-threatening. Neither is being rejected. Therefore, when these feelings come up, we can appraise them and determine that they aren’t life-threatening. From this assessment process, we're able to determine how to move forward.

So, the fear of rejection is worse than rejection itself.

Courage to Connect with Others

Reaching out to connect with others from an authentic place is an act of courage. It doesn’t negate the anxiousness that you may feel as you show your true thoughts and feelings. Being aware of the emotions and choosing to be authentic anyway allows these sensations to settle. As we continue to do this over time we become truly confident and these emotional states diminish.

Keep in mind for you to connect with another you have to be able to respect and honor their truth, just as you want them to do. You have to appreciate their viewpoint and offer compassion and understanding. Both parties need to be open and kind, sharing themselves with bravery and genuineness.

So, don't get afraid of rejection from others. Try to make connections without any fear because your connections to all the surrounding things define who you are.