Dating: Do's & Don'ts
Dating: Do's & Don'ts

How To Get Over A Breakup

by Jelly Moore 2 years ago in advice

Steps to moving on after a breakup.

How To Get Over A Breakup

Breakups sucks, don't they? If you have never experienced a breakup consider yourself lucky but for those who have, we know how painful it can be but the good news is we can get over it and move on.

Here are my how-to's for getting over and moving on after a breakup:

1.) Space:

The best thing to do right after a breakup is to give each other space. Hurtful things might have been said and emotions are still high, space after the breakup gives both time to reflect, realize what happened and to understand the reasoning behind the breakup.

2.) Express your feelings (privately):

Cry your eyes out, journal how you feel, scream if you have to. Getting out these emotions are good for you and releases the pain you're feeling. It's a good idea to first do these things in private; after a breakup there's sometimes a lot of confusion, while you're still grieving and accepting the breakup it's possible to overwhelm your ex, friends and others with the emotions of the pain you feel if you reach out to them right away.

3.) Make time for yourself:

Get back into things you enjoy, like hobbies you might of stopped during your relationship. Binge watch your favorite shows, zone out with your favorite tunes (check out the breakup song playlist below) read a new book or whatever you're into. Sometimes we forget that we had a life before we met the person we were in a relationship with.

4.) Spend time with your family and friends:

Spending time with family and friends allows you to remember there's other people in your life that care and love you. This could be a good time to take a family vacation or trip with your friends.

5.) Build your confidence:

This one is fun! Breakups can affect self-esteem, leaving us feeling unwanted or not good enough, especially if we were the one dumped. Get out there and show the world what you got! Get a new hair cut or hair style, buy some new clothes and strut your stuff.

6.) Set new goals:

Putting your focus on other things helps with moving on. It'll shift your focus off the breakup to new exciting things to look forward to. Now could be the time to focus on that job promotion, career change, fitness goal, education goal, whatever you desire.

7.) Get closure:

Closure can come by reaching out to your ex and having a farewell conversation and accepting the breakup mutually or it could come by accepting the breakup alone.

How to get closure without talking to an ex: It's possible to get closure without talking to an ex; talk to a trusted friend or family member about your breakup instead and get closure from the support and advice they offer. Write a letter to you ex without actually sending it. Include the reasons why the breakup was best. Another way is by simply letting time past by: time heals all. By putting your focus and energy towards other things that make you happy, you'll be able to accept things the way they are and move on.

8.) Join a group or organization:

Being a part of something is a good feeling. Groups and organizations give a purpose, you'll share similar interest with other people. Not only will this put you in good spirits after a breakup, it could also be an opportunity for you to meet new people that you can potentially date. Meetup is a online website were you can find things to do with locals who have similar interest. Book clubs, dance, sports, and more, you can find it on Meetup.

advice
Jelly Moore
Jelly Moore
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Jelly Moore

Midwestern native, I live, work and play in NYC.  

See all posts by Jelly Moore