Gaslighting: What it Is.

Gaslighting is rewriting reality to suit the needs of the person doing the gaslighting, because gaslighting is one pretty, nasty, little lie, and I have been gaslit by my family since I was born. One book I have called The Gaslight Effect, is incredibly useful to me since I put it on my iPhone, since one exercise recommended is about living 24 hours with only your own opinion in your head, and it is lovely that the book refers to gaslighting as the gaslighting tango since it takes two to tango with that. The term "gaslight," comes from an old movie from the 1940s, called Gaslight, which came out in 1944 and is about a woman whose crooked husband wants to steal her jewelry while he changes the lights around in order to make her feel crazy, when she isn't. The husband then isolates the wife from the outside world. Gaslighting is about making someone think something. It is about lying to them while coming up with your own version of what happened.

Abusers love pulling this with their victims. They want their victims to think one thing even if they think the other, knowing fully what really happened. Gaslighting is insidious and evil. Relationships do not require to do the dance. I want to work on not accepting my families' gaslighting if only because it is self-destructive of them. Gaslighting can happen over really, incredibly stupid things on top of that. The gaslight tango is epic, ruling friendships, partners, or even relationships such as the student-teacher one. Gaslighting is all about making someone feel bad. It works because the innocent victim is gullible, thinking, oh my gaslighter doesn't mean any harm by it, when actually the gaslighter does. Gaslighting is just plain insidious. It does people immense harm by rewriting your history for goodness sake. It means that people are going to go out of their way to rewrite history for their victims, in any relationship that an innocent has going for themselves. A person has a moment where the gaslighting takes place, that makes them gullible, thinking, oh they didn't really mean it! I'm fine. But this is their weakness. The weakness of giving the bully the benefit of the doubt all because the bully wants you to think they are not hurting you.

Bullies are deliberate in everything they do, from depriving their kid of medication to easily manipulate them into drinking, bullies are what bullies do. The bully is someone who cannot let go of things. Bad people make good people feel uncomfortable because a bad person does the gaslighting on someone all while looking like the innocent good person. This is why it is hard to make habitual gaslighters squirm, and in fact you have to corner them. Making people squirm is my specialty as one of my many talents. I have many skills, you see. This is one of them. But anyway, the thing is, that gaslighters will do things deliberately to rewrite your reality in your head as you perceive it. Gaslighters live for doing this and they love it. Gaslighting is some people's way of life, or bread and butter. It is something they do regularly, without feeling guilty. You normal person who knows how to dump toxic influences, do not have to take gaslighting. Gaslighting is a form of insidious, not to mention harsh, abuse.

Gaslighting is all about rewriting history, and is an immense violation of emotional safety. It speaks "no, you didn't realize how it happened my way." Gaslighting is wholly evil. It means whomever does it to an innocent person is going straight to hell. Gaslighting is something that means a lot to people who do it, because they want you to believe their lie. I speak from personal experience since every day in my youth I was gaslit. Now I can spot it easily, and throw it back in my relative's face if they do it. I mean, gaslighting can confuse the victim, which is the point of this action. Gaslighting is rude, unnatural, and as bad as other forms of abuse.

Works Cited

Stern Dr. Robin. The Gaslight Effect: How to Spot and Survive the Hidden Manipulation Others Use To Control Your Life