Game Shows, Gumption, and Grace.
What Happens When the Platter Never Appears.
As children, we usually have dreams of what our life will look like. We have big dreams and goals, and feel good about the possibility of those dreams coming true. Then as we grow up and gain responsibilities of life, such as, college, bills, finding our own place to live, relationships outside of our immediate family, that’s when things can seem to get tricky, right?
All of a sudden, we realize the work it takes just to get through our daily life. Things happen and before you know it, you may be having fun and may be happy, but you also may begin to realize that those big dreams and goals you had as a child aren’t happening. And you seem to be living in the movie Groundhog Day, where you are living the same day over and over again, but don’t have the time, money, or resources now to make those dreams your reality. Now there may be a spouse, children, a home, or other things that now play into all your decision making, and complicate just being able to jump into something new or chase after those dreams.
This happened to me. I had a vision and big dreams, and for a while I was making those happen. Then I let life kind of get in the way. I listened to the outside voices of how I should be living my life, and all of a sudden my dreams got tucked away into a drawer. I started living for others and following the societal rules that say you grow up, get married, have kids, etc….
So I got married, had kids, and became a suburban housewife and mom. Something I never thought would happen to this independent girl with big dreams of taking on the world and being a free spirit. Now there is nothing wrong with that, other than it wasn’t what I had seen for myself. And many people can do those things and still live out their dreams, but once I had children, I was the type of mother who wanted to stay home with her kids. So I became an entrepreneur, and did anything I could to make money from home so I could be there 24/7 for my kids.
Having kids was the greatest gift I have ever had. It changed my life and me, in ways that I could not imagine my life without. But over time, as my kids grew up and started to become independent and have lives of their own, which is what I wanted for them, of course, I became lost. They needed me less and less, and I was left with that girl who had all those big dreams, but was now so much older and didn’t quite know what my new vision was, or how to incorporate my dreams into my current life.
I was tired, lost, and depressed. How was I going to find the way to move from the life I had been living now for so long, to one that I dreamed about and wanted for myself. I found myself starting to feel sorry for myself, and sad for the loss of the young girl I used to be. Next thing you know, I found myself laying on the sofa, day in and day out, while the kids were at school. Sure, I won a ton of prizes and cars from my sofa, as I played along with the contestants on The Price is Right, and fantasized about the life I could have while watching soap operas until the kids came home. But what I really was doing was just waiting for someone to show up and hand me my dream life on a silver platter. Waiting to be rescued. Something had gone terribly awry and I was ready to be picked up and placed in a different life. One where I was excited to wake up every day, not just for the joy my kids brought me, but for my own soul to be fulfilled too.
Days, months, years went by until I finally got clear on how this was all going to go down. I realized I had to decide that things were going to change. I had to create the steps and take action on how I wanted my life to be and then make it happen. There was no one else holding the silver platter with my dream life on it. It was me. I was holding the platter, and I could put it down and walk away, or I could work hard and make decisions to keep that platter balanced, steady, and hold all that I wanted in my life. I needed to gather up my gumption and get to work, because I was choosing the latter. My only question now was how big of a platter could I find, because this girl had big dreams and big ideas.
As I started to come alive again, I had to remind myself that it was going to take time. It was a balancing act of holding onto the parts of my life I treasured, and adding in the new things that lit me up and created excitement and joy for me. I had to give myself grace, that this was not going to be easy, it was going to take a lot of hard work, but it would be so worth it.
So today I am asking you to create a vision for yourself and what you want your life to look like. Stop being stuck in the busy, the demands of day to day life, and start making the time for your own magic. Stop feeling sorry for yourself, stop waiting for someone else to hand you that platter, stop waiting, period. You have everything you need inside of yourself to create the life where you wake up every day exhilarated, full of life, making a difference, and building a legacy. The time is now to begin. Just begin with the vision and then take one step each day to move closer to it. It will happen and remember the joy is in the journey. So you are never too old and it’s never too late, because each step you take moving forward, realizing you have the power within to change your life, well, my friends, that is the real gift.