Ethan ♡. Siris (V)

by L.N. Amethyst 15 days ago in lgbtq

Don't Tell Him What He Doesn't Know

Ethan ♡. Siris (V)

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---L.N. Amethyst


Ethan ♡. Siris (V)

The next day, school time arrived. Morning approached and everyone in Lincoln Valley High got ready for a new day. Ethan got into his morning advisory, tired, depressed, and alone as usual. And Mr. Hank, the advisory teacher, was reading a list of names on the attendance sheet.

"Cafey Lanette, Tiffany Armond, Mileena Swayveel, Arnis Lexel," the teacher called out.

All of the class peers said here and finally went to Ethan's name.

"Ethan Jackson," the teacher exclaimed.

"Here," Ethan replied.

The teacher sighed, "he's late again... Has anyone seen-"

Out of nowhere, Siris comes into the room.

"I'm here Mr. I'm not late."

"Siris, you're lucky. I was going to write down absent. Maybe I'll do it more early next time."

"Wooooow," Siris replied fictitiously.

Everyone in the class chuckled but only a few minded their own business.

Siris was going to sit where he usually does but decided to flump a few seats away next to a girl who was always alone in the corner. Of course, he didn't say anything but made it quite obvious.

Everyone just looked at each other with sided eyes and the teacher just rolled his eyes and sat at his desk, happy that he can get a quick break before another inexplicable day at the facility.

Ethan sat at his desk and put down his head until the bell rung. His thick hair covered his cheeks for warmth and closure. He couldn't help but feel this disconnection. Like there was this empty void in him. Something was missing... But he felt like this every single day of his life, still, a tormented emotion came across his mental well-being.

Ethan fashioned the decision to raise up his head and scattered his sight around the classroom he sat in. He looked at the football player his advisory was communicating with and immediately, his head began to hurt, relentlessly. It was as if some sort of reckoning force tramble into his mind and fiddled with his emotions, trying to perfect the imperfect reality of some sort of reflective memory.

Ethan raised his right hand and called upon his advisor, "Mr..." he delicately spoke under his breath. The advisor knew Ethan's voice was softer than the rest of the guys, but he never undermined that fact and respected his students' individualities. Instead, he trained himself to understand him clearly as of every other teacher there.

Instantly, the teacher replied, "yes, Ethan? Is there something wrong? You look lost."

Siris forced his head to look at Ethan and gradually stopped the conversation he had with Mr. Hank. He looked down at his desk and re-done his backpack supplies. Strangely enough, he noticed his notebooks and textbooks appeared similar to yesterday's supplies from his other classrooms. Miraculously, Siris made the notion to not dwell on the phenomenon too much and forgotten about the scenario.

On the other hand, it was a miracle Ethan's headache simmered down. He was going to ask to go to the nurse's office but swiftly rejected his own request.

Mr. Hank decided to talk to Siris once again before the school day began.

"So, I heard your team one last football game against Rockwood. They are a hard team to defeat. Especially this year."

"They train, but we train harder Mr," Siris said. His Latino accent dispersing from his tongue.

Ethan went into his backpack and noticed a sheet of paper that wasn't placed there yesterday. Lowly eager to fasten his attention to it because of his distaste of mornings, he adjudged to read the words on the paper. He discovered it was a letter to... himself.

He recited the words in his mind and gasped under his breath connected with the following sigh.

"Hopefully, my team will train more. They've been lazy lately, but our coach is strong and a little mean, though."

"Yes, that coach of ours... He's a little tough. But he's a good coach. You'll win again next time for sure," Mr. Hank did his job and advised Siris.

The bell finally rang and the class got up. Ethan was still in shock about this sporadic letter he found in his book bag. His chocolate eyes were staring into the distance but he did not sight chairs or desks, logos and reminders posted up on the classroom's walls that noted "Eat.Right.Now" or the simple pencil sharpeners embroidered next to the entrance nobody used, not even the teachers. No, it was the conclusion of lovely "mirages" of him being with... Siris?

I need to grow up... Ethan thought to himself. But eventually, he felt one tear fall from his left eye. His recollections of a past relationship that possibly never existed... Was he going mad? Did something... Unspoken happened? Ethan felt an unnerved swept of pandemonium cross his flesh.

"No... Not now," he spoke under his tongue.

"Ethan?" Mr. Hank peacefully called out to the bewildered young man.

Ethan immediately got up from his seat and stood next to it. Tears materialized underneath his eyes. He tried his absolute best and strength to hide it, but these sudden amounts of emotions catered to the unknown and lead up to nothing but his self-conflicted non-values. Those same insecurities that haunted him in which he tried to break. The directed constant insecurity of his own physical surface and a repeated subconscious the school counselor tried to fraction but could never once mend.

"Are you alright, Ethan?" The teacher said.

Siris heard the conversation, always being the last to get out and behind the student, he sat near moments ago, he turned around and saw a tearful Ethan. Ethan only stared back in disbelief, in the end, both of them looked at each other in wonder.

"I see you crying man... I hope you're okay, bro and-," Siris was going to spree out more unconditional words but a teammate called out to him from the main hallway.

It was Hadaniel. Somehow, Siris may have forgotten about what Hadaniel has done to a young woman he had got pregnant and left to be forgotten. But unfortunately, Ethan could not recall who she exactly was.

Siris left out the front entrance to either go to his next class or irresponsibly skip it. Strangely enough, there was that same smirk Ethan recognized, but at that moment, he did not acknowledge the facial expression.

"What's wrong? Should I take you to the counselor, again?" Mr. Hank asked in consideration. Siris shook his head to and fro and downgraded his mood.

"No," Ethan simply replied.

"I have my way of dealing with this. These innocent little attacks. But I'm fine."

Ethan went into his bag and got out a bottle of kojic acid lotion. He immediately used it on his hands and face for obvious reasons. Next, he used olive oil to contain the unpleasant feeling it will give him. Controversial personal torture, a point-of-view could comprehend.

"Well, let me know if you need anything, okay? I'm here for you. You're not alone. People care about you. And I know you may feel like people are not like you but millions are and-"

"I'm fine," Ethan interrupted. "Have a good day, Mr. Hank." Ethan swiftly got up and left.

He could only think his feelings for Siris were nothing more than a fairytale. An imagination, if you will. But they were real, and despite the imaginative world that lurked within every corner of his vast mind, all he could do was write about it.

Don't tell him what he doesn't know, Ethan thought.


Author’s Note

I would like to personally thank you for reading the novelette story, "Ethan ♡. Siris." I hope I have inspired you, the reader, in some form and way about what gay individuals who are melanated go through, or at least for me in a sense. I've written Ethan ♡. Siris when I was about sixteen going on seventeen, and it was extremely different than what you've currently recited. Contrarily, I hope I've kept that same energy of Ethan's and Siris's upbringings and downfalls. Ultimately, I decided to give them the age of eight-teen relating to their new adulthood. In clarity, this symbolizes how many individuals perceive orientations as a phase, and how somewhat controversial and global topics such as orientation forcefully doesn't want to be addressed in elderly Uranians, mental stability in a society where it is only seen as lustful, and realistic virtues that may lead to stereotypes no one wants to acknowledge.

There will be an extended sequel to "Ethan ♡. Siris" which will explain in depth about the neglected and nefarious history within the community, displayed in Ethan's future life, resided in a mental institution. Let's just say he is going to be put into an uncanny predicament of unanswered questions about his mental state of mind and how the societal people around him may be a reflection of his inner and unspoken traits.

Stay tuned for the novella, "Uranian."

~~~L.N. Amethyst

L.N. Amethyst
L.N. Amethyst
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L.N. Amethyst

L.N. Amethyst is an author who has been writing ever since he was nine and often resides in the fantasy, science-fiction, and mystery realm. He hopes to one day inspire the world and give back to nature through his literacy works.

See all posts by L.N. Amethyst