You may be wondering if men find it attractive when women initiate contact. It can be challenging since a woman sometimes just want to be in command. She enjoys making the first move for the kiss and asking for the phone number since she enjoys the adorable surprise and excitement on her man's face.
Making the move can be a strategy for some women to assert power or control over the circumstance, while for others, it's just a means of getting from point A to point B.
Regardless of why she does it, the question here is: do guys like it when girls make the first move?
You’re really asking whether or not a guy likes the idea of a girl who lets him off the figurative hook of always having to ask her out first? Come on! The dating world is a frustrating neighborhood, and your neighbors can be identified easily: mind games, playing hot and cold, and push and pull.
What type of a man wouldn't like being occasionally let off the hook and having the woman solve the problem?
Of course, there are obvious reasons why many men would find it awkward when a woman expresses her desires openly, especially if those guys tend to be the more traditional sorts.
However, the quick answer is a resounding YES.
Many men adore it. In fact, they might even support the behavior within the uneasy women's club. For once, they want to relieve themselves of some of the burden by not having to bother about setting up the initial call, text, hangout, or date.
Why do guys like it when girls make the first move?
If you’re a woman who’s wondering if making the first move would earn you brownie points, here are some of the top reasons.
1. Low-pressure lady
One of the main reasons men like it is that it takes the pressure off. Anyone who’s ever had a crush knows the painstaking effort it can take to reveal your true feelings when you don’t know if they’re reciprocated.
Men like not having to worry about the responsibility of making the first move, plus the worry and awkwardness that comes along with it. So if you’re looking to make the first move, why not just go for it?
2. Shy boys favor outspoken women
The idea of a girl making all the moves and starting all the activity may be exactly what the doctor ordered for some men who are incredibly bashful.
These men will enjoy being around a strong woman in authority and will be content to watch you make all the decisions.
3. Being confident is hot.
You taking the lead with your initial movements will tease him and make him curious about what your subsequent sex actions will be like. Men adore ladies with self-assurance. Nothing is more attractive to them than a woman who isn't scared to go after what she wants because she understands what she wants.
A self-assured girl is seen by men as a self-sufficient, non-clingy decision-maker. She is wonderful, fearless, and brave.
Nevertheless, there may still be guys who don't like the overall take-charge approach, despite these significant arguments.
4. It’s flattering
When someone asks you out, it’s a huge compliment, isn’t it? It means they think you’re attractive and like your personality. And who doesn’t like to be flattered like this? Of course, women do!
But men are human too, and he likes being complimented and having a woman indirectly tell him “you’re awesome” by asking him out. So do guys like girls who make the first move? While some guys may be taken aback pleasantly, they’ll still be VERY flattered!
5. It boosts his ego
If a guy is used to asking girls out, but she gets to him first, it can really boost his ego. He suddenly feels a lot better about himself – even if he did already.
Now, depending on the guy, this may be good or bad. He could hurt you if he's a player, in which case. However, if he's simply a regular person, it's fantastic to bolster his ego.
6. He enjoys being pursued.
In the conventional definition of the word, men typically pursue women. It's just sort of biologically based. But while engaging in all the chasing can be exciting and difficult, it can also be draining.
He won't have to pursue you when you ask him out. If you give him a respite, he may relax and appreciate being chased in the same way that women have for so many years.
7. He need not experience rejection
You know, guys have sensitive egos too. They find it difficult to put their egos on the line and approach a girl. They could be turned down at any time. And the majority of people dislike being rejected, right?
Therefore, it's a huge comfort to them that they won't have to deal with the potential blow to his self-esteem if they decline his invitation.
8. He thinks the woman is humble and real
When a woman is flirting and teasing a guy in order to have him ask her out, sometimes it can come across as fake. It’s almost like she’s playing a role and not being genuine just so she can score a date with him.
But if you are direct and honest when you ask him out, he will perceive you as humble and real. This makes you much more attractive to him.
9. He doesn’t have to wonder if you’re attracted to him
Even when guys ask girls out and a girl says yes, he is still not sure if she’s actually attracted to him or not. A lot of women are just really nice, and they don’t want to hurt a guy’s feelings by turning him down for a date.
So, if a girl asks a guy out and makes a move on him, he knows she finds him attractive. This is also a relief because he doesn’t have to wonder whether he should kiss her or make another move at the end of the night.
10. He doesn't value conventional gender roles
The world has changed significantly since the 1950s. Men dominated the time period and took the initiative. Women took care of the newborns at home instead of working.
Therefore, if he rejects those conventional gender norms, he will understand that you do as well. And that suggests that you two might be a perfect match!
Why don't some guys like it when women initiate contact?
Despite how great it makes you feel to be in command, some guys might find it a little strange when a woman initiates contact. Although some ladies might think this is a touch too 1950s, these males have their own explanations.
1.It's not very ladylike, for one
Guys might not think it's ladylike for girls to initiate contact as their first objection. Men generally seem more at ease when women make the initial sexual move, but not when it comes to emotional decisions like who chooses the first restaurant or the first date.
If you make the initial physical move on your new boyfriend, you might feel confident, but he might be curious as to how many other males you've dated in the past to make you feel so eager and brazen.
In essence, as unjust as it may seem, by initiating physical contact, you do, unfortunately, run the danger of coming across as a little bit of a slut, especially to guys with wary and extremely limited minds.
2. Being intimidating and demeaning
This kind of woman might be scary and even emasculating to certain guys. He might be confused by your assertive choices if he was expecting him to make the first move and ask you out or initiate the first kiss.
Although it would seem like an issue that only a teenager would experience, grown men have been known to bolt and sulk in response to such behavior.
He believes that the fact that you stole his balls is a portent of good things to come in their relationship. And for a male, that's never a good indication!
3. He follows tradition
The traditional types of males are still the ones that offer to open your car door, still like asking you out, and still think that men should initiate relationships. Your new world of strong woman feminism may not be appealing to conventional men.
This is not to say that these men should be attacked for their opinions or that they oppose women's rights; it just means that they were raised in a more conventional way and are unsure of how to deal with your assertiveness.
Never forget that just because you like your role as the "leading lady," your boyfriend shouldn't be lazy about taking the initiative. You put in a lot of effort, thus you merit to be treated royally as well.
How to ask a guy out and still be desired and respected by him
Now that you know all the reasons guys would like girls to make the first move – and why they wouldn’t – you should decide if you’re going to go through with it or not. If you decide to go for it, then here are some ways you can ask him out.
1. Offer him a free ticket to something
This is always a great, casual, nonchalant way to ask someone out. Buy two tickets to something like a concert or a sporting event. Then, you can say to him, “I am going to this concert and my friend bailed on me, so I have an extra ticket. Would you like to go with me?”
This is very slick because he’s not necessarily sure if you are asking him on a date or just don’t want to waste the ticket. IF he likes you enough, he will jump at the chance.
2. Look for a shared interest
If you want to test the waters with this guy first and are unsure whether boys enjoy girls who initiate contact, speak with him and learn more about his interests.
Does he enjoy the same activities you do—running, hiking, happy hour, going to the movies, etc.? When you discover an activity that interests both of you, you might advise engaging in it together.
Have you ever gone hiking in the Hocking Hills? If he declines, you can respond, "Oh, you should definitely give it a try sometime. If you do, let me know so I can show you around.
3. Invite him to coffee.
A quiet activity to do with someone is getting coffee. You can do it while working or studying, and it can be brief and delicious. It isn't overly committing either.
You can therefore say something like, "I'm about to go grab some coffee across the street," when you see him. Want to accompany me? Even if he isn't exactly sure if it's a date, at least you will have some quality alone time.
Simply expressing your hunger and asking if he wants to go out to lunch with you are other options.
4. Plan a group outing.
If you have mutual acquaintances or coworkers, you can try the group date approach if you aren't ready to take him out on a date alone. He will still know you cared enough about him to invite him along, but you won't entirely expose yourself to rejection.
5. Have assurance
The most crucial thing to keep in mind is this. When you approach a guy, you need to come across as confident. He might not be as responsive if you come off as frightened or your voice sounds trembling. Guys appreciate girls who value themselves, and when that confidence shines through, they become even more alluring.
You now know if men prefer it when women initiate contact. What does it matter if your possible partner doesn't like you making the first move? Ignore him. In the end, you're a powerful woman who is determined to get what she wants, so if you want to make the first move, seize the day head-on and don't look back!
There are no comments for this story
Be the first to respond and start the conversation.