Dating Rut? From Single to The Partner of Your Dreams

by Brandon Guarascio 6 months ago in advice

The How to, What to, and When to!

Dating Rut? From Single to The Partner of Your Dreams

The moment you wake up, tossing about, flipping your pillow over so many times, you reach out and all of a sudden there is nothing but a cold pillow on the other side of your bed waiting to greet you! Other than the 3 seconds of pure pleasure from feeling that cold pillow touch your rosy cheeks, fades just as easily back to the disdain you're feeling for the reality that you are, indeed, single!! Say it again, and again, louder for those in the back... I am SINGLEEEE... and I hate it, but I don't know how to get out of it!

There are just so many options, so many ways, and yet I can't seemingly find a single soul that wants even an inkling of the collective things that I do!! What is wrong with me!?

Well, nothing is wrong with you, you are human and desire love, affection, and the connection with another, which is a basic need in this thing we call life. The good news for you is that you are reading this and I have some answers for you!! The idea of how to effectively go from single to the partner of your dreams in 6 months sounds daunting but in reality, it is quite simple; it comes down to one key thing... let this love find you!

Now, there is one thing, and that is most likely the only thing you are doing improperly at this moment, the approach! Read on to find out exactly how to tackle this thing called love in this modern world where everyone is seemingly unavailable.

10 step plan from single to the partner of your dreams...


Let go! For the life of you stop texting your inner circle and using every lunch date opportunity to talk about how you are single and dreading every moment! Your friends and colleagues know this already, you look desperate and it isn't helping you find anyone. So just let it go, stop attaching, stop swiping, and first let it all go!


Work that hobby life! Finding another person to share your life with; you will have interests and they will have interests... it is good to be able to do these separately or sometimes together to show individualism, ability to maintain commitment, etc. So, get out there and put yourself out there it will be the best thing you have ever done! some ideas include sports you were good at in high school/college, painting night, connoisseur groups, travel meetups, virtually anything you find interesting that provides a commitment and something for you to do collectively.


Put yourself out there to the masses, and no, I don't mean an app or anything of the sort, yet! That is a whole other ball game, but for now, try a speed dating group or professionals mixer event. This will allow you to get a confidence boost by being social and possibly even striking up a flirtatious conversation or two in the meantime. Use this as a low-pressure opportunity to have fun and just be YOU!


Talk, smile, laugh be overall just you and let your positivity shine through. After all, you have decluttered your life through the first 3 steps, and at this point... probably feeling quite well with your situation. Let your light shine to all who come in contact with you.


You will, by this point, have a date, two, three, maybe more lined up and ready for you to enjoy... Don't worry this is fun and none of these people are "The One!"

They are waiting for the moment you least expect it to swoop in and sweep you from your feet. Have fun with this and just do it!


Ok, you have most likely made it through months 1 and 2. You have found yourself through simplifying your life, activities you enjoy, socializing without pressure, and healthy no pressure dates. This has given you perspective and confidence about your position and what you have to offer. Now, you have the foundation to be able to 'refine' your search and that perfect mate finds you in the process. Take a breath, and enjoy your space!


Download your favorite most effective dating app that you have a firm basic understanding of the functions and the operations. This is important because you don't want to just go on here and begin swiping, clicking, accepting, and chatting yourself into a dead-end! Understand how to 'funnel' your suitors to grab the attention of your highest values.


You have chatted with and met some great people at this point, you are going to events that are specific to your interests and you even find yourself stepping out of your comfort zone and enjoying new activities that bring you on some interesting journeys, and new places! You certainly have a renewed spirit and aren't spending evenings feeling bad for yourself or willing away social opportunities!


The day happens, you least expected it, you are out and about at your favorite neighborhood dining spot, a show, sporting event, concert, or whatever of the multitude options this modern world provides and you meet the ONE!! You have no idea in that blissful moment that this individual is the one, and then it just happens you begin talking and you set up a time to hang more, from there you may hang for longer and longer and you before you know, it could be three days ( my case anyway) hehe :) Don't worry about scaring this person off they want exactly what you do be fun but direct and very telling of your intentions. This is very important!


Blissful, adventurous, amazing, and like you never expected this person couldn't be any more perfect until they aren't! That is ok, no one is there is nothing as such but there is that perfect person for you! Even when that imperfection rears its head, maintain your communication, transparency, and intimacy and you will make it through anything! Enjoy your new-found freedom from "Why can't I?" to "I did!"

Brandon Guarascio
Brandon Guarascio
Read next: 'Chocolate Kisses'
Brandon Guarascio
See all posts by Brandon Guarascio