Dating After A Divorce

by Claire Raymond 2 years ago in divorce

Dating after divorce can be scary.

Dating After A Divorce

Being out of the dating game for a while can have a serious impact on your confidence, which can make it incredibly difficult for someone to start dating again after a divorce. Experts say that you should date as soon as possible to get yourself "dating fit," but this is not always as easy as it sounds. It can be an emotionally overwhelming experience to start dating again after a divorce and it is something that should be handled with care and attention.

Don't date on the rebound after a divorce.

If the person you are divorcing or divorced from has begun dating, it can be very easy to want to start dating yourself as a knee-jerk reaction. This is totally normal, but ill-advised. Dating on the rebound after divorce is asking for trouble. It can lead to hasty and poor decisions which will ultimately leave you feeling more unhappy than when you first started.

Wait until you are ready, and it doesn't matter how long it takes. The only thing that matters is that you are ready to date and that you feel comfortable opening yourself up to dating experiences after your divorce.

Do what you are comfortable with when dating.

This is very important. Don't let someone rush you or pressure you into something that you are not completely comfortable with. If you feel like someone you are dating is pressuring you, then you need to stop talking to them as they clearly do not know how to respect your boundaries.

Take your time, go at your own pace, and you will feel more comfortable on dates and be more likely to meet a nicer, more well- rounded person.

Take dating advice.

If you have never really dated much or you haven't dated for a long time, try seeking some advice from those that have been there recently. Even if you don't really know anyone, you can find lots of dating advice from seasoned experts online.

Take note of their advice. They have been there before and they know the potential pitfalls of dating after a divorce.

Be comfortable on your own before dating.

This is crucial before you start dating at any age. You need to be comfortable being by yourself before you pick someone to be with. If you aren't, then you run the risk of making a very bad decision, simply because you don't want to be on your own. Learn to love your own company by engaging in a hobby, making new friends, or simply pampering yourself and enjoying some peace and quiet.

Start small on websites.

If you are hesitant, take small steps, join a dating site, and create a profile, then do nothing until you are ready to take another step. If you are not ready for a full-on romantic evening, consider going for a coffee or lunch as a first date. This will give you a chance to get a feel for new company without having to commit yourself to potential romance.

Be honest when dating.

There is always a temptation to lie or stretch the truth a little bit on your dating profile, but this never works out well. Lies always get discovered and you will look foolish and you could potentially risk losing someone you do care about because you lied to them. You wouldn't like it if someone lied to you, so don't do it to them.

Be safe on a date.

This is the most important one. Always be safe when going on a date, let someone know where you are going, who you are going with, and if possible, show someone a picture of the person you will be with. Let someone know when you are there and when you get back. Go to a public and well-lit place with plenty of people around for your first couple of dates at least. Never invite someone to your home or go to their home for a first date, and even when you do go to their home, tell someone else where that is. It may sound over-cautious, but it is always better to be on the safe side.

Don't be nervous. It's just a date!

Dating after a divorce can feel very intimidating, but it is something that can be a great deal of fun and you could make new friends and meet some wonderful new people. Yes, sometimes people won't be great, but that is part of a life-building and enriching dating experience.

How does it work?
Read next: 'Chocolate Kisses'
Claire Raymond

I have been a writer for 14 years now, I'll figure it out one day.

See all posts by Claire Raymond