Can You Promise Everything Will Be Fine?
"It will be fine".
Lately, I hear the sentence ‘It will be fine' a lot.
This sentence gave me the thought of whether everything can actually be fine? Will everything be fine? Or will just a part be fine? Why do we need to put each other at ease with 'it will be fine'? Do you feel better? Do I feel better?
Did you promise your child ‘everything will be fine’? I have said those words a lot in my life – and to my daughters. It is fine to say 'it will be fine', but it must be meant at the right moment, during the right occasion. When I organized the concerts for my oldest daughter her orchestra, I meant it to the children, that what they asked for, will be fine.
Have you those moments in your life and you say: ‘It will be fine’? I have those thoughts a lot, even when I know that it might not be fine, now or in the end. Even, I said it a million times to my daughters. Not always will things be just fine. Maybe after getting through the (little) goals, but still, I needed to give them the courage to do so. Often, I thought: 'Am I saying the right things to them by saying ‘it’ll be fine!’?
Will everything be fine? I am not sure, but what I know, is that everything has a turning point and you'll be satisfied with the results.
Did you have the thoughts at work: ‘I can do this and everything will be fine!’, but actually it was too difficult for you to do? Did you have a task to do and you started late, you thought: ‘it will be fine’, and you promised your boss to do the tasks?
Once I had. I was in my internship for the secretary education I never finished. They asked me to write a letter, a formal letter, I never had done that before. Eventually, I did, and I did with lots of mistakes in grammar. In the end, I learned from these grammar mistakes, so it went fine and it became fine in the end. I had to learn from the mistakes before it all went fine in the end.
I believe you had these moments in your life. Maybe multiple times a week?! Sometimes, I have these moments multiple times per month. I can plan, but keeping onto the planning is not really my thing. Something I need to learn. Because of not keeping onto my planning, I am doing my tasks too late or at the latest moments.
A few weeks ago, I thought about promising your children that everything will be fine. Can you promise your children everything will be fine? This is a difficult question to answer. When your child fell on the floor, sometimes it gets blood, pain and a wound. That wound will heal, and that wound will be fine someday. Thus, it will be fine eventually.
When your child had been bullied at school, can you promise that it will be fine? This is a wound on its soul. This wound will be carried every day of its life. Will it be fine? Maybe, this won’t be fine because your child is hurt, but eventually, your child can live with it. Your child can be triggered now and then. Your child needs time to heal, to give it space in its soul. One day your child can live with it somehow.
Will your child be fine then? It is always in its soul. It carries the events with every day. The traumas come back now and then. So, will it be fine?
What if your child doesn’t understand the math exercise correctly, can you promise that it will be fine? You can promise it will be fine because, with small steps, your child understands the maths exercise. This will be fine in the end.
When you have been through abuse, will this be fine? Well, in my case, it won’t be fine. I carry it with me every day. This is a huge trauma. Somehow, I can live with it, heal from it, but it always will be carrying this trauma in my soul. Let's take a look at what fine actually means.
Fine means – according to the Cambridge Dictionary: It is good or good enough, healthy and well, excellent, much better than average, very thin, very small pieces or drops, very exact and delicate, needing to be done, treated, considered very carefully, bad, not convenient, an amount of money that needs to be paid as a punishment for not obeying a rule of law, in a satisfactory way, very high quality.
Can you promise yourself that (all) things will be fine? When I was in therapy three years ago, I thought everything got worse; all my past opened the doors again. That hurts a lot! But every session I managed to open those doors again. My first therapist knew how to do that without forcing me in a certain direction. These kinds of therapists I love!
So, in my case, it'll be fine in a certain way I can live with this pain.
About the writer
Agnes Laurens is a writer. She writes for the local newspaper. Agnes lives in The Netherlands, with her husband and three daughters. You can find her on Vocal, Medium, Elephant Journal, HubPages, Music List. Writing is — aside from playing the violin — one of her passions since childhood. She is on Twitter and Instagram. You can subscribe to my mailing list, and you can subscribe to my Thoughts. Check out her books. She has an online web store, and she has a merchandise store. If you want to be informed about my online store and my merch, please follow this link.