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Break up immediately after the start of a new relationship to heal, okay?

Romance

By Dylan M ParkinPublished 2 years ago 3 min read

A study says that the longer the last relationship, the higher the degree of mutual trust, the faster the breakup will start a new relationship; people who are broken up are often more likely to start a new relationship; in love is anxious type of people "window period" will be shorter. The reason for entering into this psychological "rebound relationship" in a short period of time is generally: to relieve the pain brought by their predecessors.

When a friend breaks up, it's painful, and we usually advise: there's no grass at the end of the earth, find another one! It always seems to be with the expectation that "the next one will be better". Soon after the "window period", in addition to making others feel that they are not serious about the previous relationship, there will be a new relationship "just for fun" suspicion. So many people refuse to fall in love with someone who has just broken up. So for people who are actively entering a new relationship quickly, this "rebound relationship" can really help him?

A "rebound relationship" can have a positive effect

1. to divert attention and relieve negative emotions.

When you get in touch with a new partner, all you see at first is his merits, and the joy of being with him fills your loneliness, so this pattern can dilute the anger towards your ex and the resentment towards the past. Of course, if the current one is really suitable, it is possible to completely forget about the hurt of the ex over time and experience happiness from the current environment.

2. Improve self-esteem and self-confidence

Especially for anxious lovers, that is, people who want to cling to each other all the time in a relationship and need to feel loved by each other's response, their self-evaluation is based on the feedback from their lovers. If they break up, their self-assessment will hit a low point and deny their self-worth. At this time, if someone is willing to love him, he will regain his self-confidence, feel his charm and not fall into depression.

3. The attitude towards relationships gets progressed

If the last relationship for a long time but finally broke up, such people will do a lot of summary of the last relationship, and try to avoid similar problems again, especially will take the initiative to improve the attitude towards relationships, such as from the original extra obsession into a relatively independent, previously like to stick to the partner, now may be more awareness of their own value, more appreciation of themselves in love.

But "rebound relationships" can also form a vicious circle, depending on the motivation for starting the relationship: 1.

1. because of the overwhelming feeling of loneliness

Some people are used to having someone to love, someone to love; or used to having a person in their heart every day, to talk, shop, travel with him, after the breakup will be particularly uncomfortable. After failing to get in touch with your ex, you will shift your goal and want to feel the feeling of having a "soulmate" with you again, without making future plans, without reflecting on the gains and losses of the last relationship, just to fill the loneliness and start the next relationship. This choice is blind, likely to meet one after another unsuitable people, until finally do not believe in love.

2. To get back at your ex or yourself

Some people are obsessed with their predecessors' relentless revelation of their shortcomings, because they care too much, it is likely that in order to revenge on their predecessors, and then find one to gas him, to prove the value of their own charm; may also feel worthless because of their predecessors' injuries, so they trampled on themselves, casually looking for someone to make up, to do something crazy and reckless.

3. lose expectations of love, began to settle for

Some people may have seriously had a few relationships, and after successive failures, they lost expectations of love. So only love as a tool, snicker, like the usual hanging ornaments became optional. So each romance became a plaything.

To start a new relationship quickly or not, first ask yourself carefully within.

Have you learned from your failure? Are you ready to face the next relationship with a new and positive heart? Are you interested in the current one? Is the current one right for you? If you were in another person's shoes, would you still choose to be in a relationship with him?

How can you tell if your partner is in a "rebound relationship" transition?

He doesn't have a lot of mental communication with you, doesn't take what you say seriously, and is hot and cold to you.

You can always hear him talking ahead of time when you're dating him, even if he says "you're better than her".

You move in together quickly and have sex frequently, much faster than the relationship develops.

advice

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    DMPWritten by Dylan M Parkin

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