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Be popular

by Alexander Miller 2 months ago in advice
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Be popular

Be popular
Photo by Phinehas Adams on Unsplash

1. Let people remember who you are. Talking when you first meet is very important. If you are disadvantaged in the conversation at the beginning, to restore this disadvantage, you must spend a lot of effort, and it is not necessarily useful. Therefore, when meeting with others, as a "self-introduction" at the beginning, it must not be sloppy. So how should you "introduce yourself"? First, put a smile on your face. A smile will make the other person feel warm. There is no way to create harmony and harmony without a smile on your face. When you meet, look at each other and smile at each other; the next step is to introduce yourself with "My name is ×××." The point of this introduction is to make it clear. If the other party calls you wrong because they don't know your name, they will definitely feel embarrassed, and it is easy to cause unpleasant scenes. Therefore, when introducing yourself, in addition to making it clear, it is best to include a sentence such as "The king is the king of the king." This will not only prevent the other party from a misunderstanding but also deepen the impression. Another very important point is to introduce yourself, of course, to make the other person remember your name, but at the same time, you must also remember the other person's name. If you don't remember clearly, it will not only disappoint the other party but also be very rude. Is there any effective way to make yourself remember each other's names? The best way is to find opportunities to say the other person's name, which can help memory. Furthermore, if you often mention the other party's name in your speech, the other party will definitely feel that you value him very much and feel happy, so it can promote communication. This is a common method in British and American social interaction, and it is worth learning from.

2. The best way to sell yourself is to let others accept it easily and without knowing it: praise the other party and secretly promote yourself. When it comes to promoting yourself, if you are too explicit, you will not be liked by others; besides, it is very laborious to talk about yourself! Just like hearing about other people's love affairs, there will not be much joy. However, as long as it is a human being, there is still the problem of showing off. When talking about your own personal things, you still want to talk about bragging, so it is necessary to know the way of bragging. So, how to say it? There are two best ways. One is, don't brag about yourself all the time, but rap each other's ass, for example, when you want to brag about your fur coat: "This is a fox fur coat, it's very warm! Do you like it? But, The deerskin-like fabric on your body is also good! Especially the dark green, which is very beautiful! I appreciate how you wear it at any time." That's enough. Another way, maybe to brighten someone's face! After all, some things cannot be accomplished alone but must rely on the strength of others. For example, if you have the qualifications of a dance teacher, if you want to boast a little, don't forget to add this sentence: "Because my mother is also a teacher, I have been forced to study since I was a child. It is also caused by my mother! Actually, think about it. You can't do much by your own strength alone. Moreover, your personal talents are limited, and you always have things beyond your power, right? So, if you want to say something bragging to others, you have to think carefully about it. , Be sure to have facts to boast about. In this way, people will not hate their boasting words.

3. Honorifics are a sign of a person's self-cultivation. In social situations, it can be very embarrassing to use the wrong honorifics. For example, when asking someone to serve you, add the word "please" or "Mr. Especially in conversations, people who address each other should say "uncle, aunt," or "your father, your mother" directly, of course, but they lack elegant temperament, and a person with status and education should not ignore these things. The same sentence will give people completely different feelings because of different ways of speaking. For example, if someone in front of you is blocking your way, you certainly don't have to ask him to get out of the way. At this time, if you say: "Get out of the way! Get out of the way! I want to go over!" you may only get a dismissive glance. If you can use honorifics, say politely: "Sir, I'm sorry, could you make way for me?" Moreover, honorifics should also be used appropriately. Otherwise, the opposite effect may be obtained. This habit should be cultivated well in ordinary times. For example, on a crowded bus, you accidentally step on someone else's foot. If you don't make a habit of it, you will be very angry. If you apologize to the other party naturally and gracefully, say: "I'm sorry. No matter how painful it is, the other party just smiles bitterly and says, "It's okay!" In fact, as long as you develop a habit and always have respect for others, the respect will come out naturally, and you don't need to use too much. 's honorifics. For example, if the boss of the company has something to call you, you don't need to use honorifics; just nod your head with a smile and ask, "What's the matter?" Then your respect will come out naturally.

4. Don't take business cards lightly. When you meet someone for the first time, you exchange names after saying hello, and then hand over business cards to each other. Such a small act of submitting a business card should also attract attention, and it is better to use a decent method. 1) The business card should be placed in the business card holder, not in other ticket holders, and should not be arbitrarily clipped in a small book, and it should be rummaged all over the place. 2) The business card holder should be placed in the inner pocket of the suit and should not be taken out of the trouser pocket. 3) Each clip should be used for a long time, so try to buy a good quality one. 4) If the other party stretches out his left hand to hand in the business card, he should extend his right hand to pick it up, and at the same time, he should also hand in the business card with his left hand so that they can be exchanged. 5) When accepting a business card, use your right hand to pick up the other party's business card and your left hand to take your own business card holder. 6) If the name on each film of the other party is difficult to read, please ask politely. 7) If the other party has more than two people, they should arrange their business cards and talk to them separately according to the order of the business cards. 8) If a person sits on a chair, they should carefully put away the other person's business card and then say goodbye to the other person. The method of submitting business cards is also explained below for reference. Requirements: Take the lower end of the business card to make it easy for the other party to pick it up; place it on the other side's chest; when only unilaterally picking up the other party's business card, extend both the left hand and the right hand at the same time.

5. Don't talk about nicknames when you meet for the first time or on formal occasions. In some places, when some people introduce themselves, they often even say their nicknames, for example: "My name is the boss, I usually call me that, you can call it this way!" But In my country, the use of nicknames is limited to close friends. Between very good friends, it is harmless to say that they call each other by nicknames. However, if a third party is present, special attention must be paid. If you always use nicknames to call each other or other people who are not present, it will confuse the third party and cause alienation. If your friend took you to the house for the first time, you suddenly said to him: "Sanmao! I think your house is very good, I like it very much..." when you say this, it will definitely make you feel like A friend's family is disgusted that you are not dignified or polite, so you should call him by his name rather than a nickname. Also, don't use nicknames when addressing a wedding ceremony. Because, on such occasions, there are many people participating, especially the relatives on both sides. When they hear the nickname, they must have "a special taste in their hearts!" Having said that, for your own sake, you shouldn't be there. This kind of occasion abuses the nickname because among the young heterosexuals present, someone may become your first love, and when you hear your speech style, you may be deterred by it. In short, it is not that the nickname cannot be used, but the place and the environment are considered. Otherwise, it is inconvenient to destroy the atmosphere of the environment, and even one's own temperament will be lost.

6. Open the gap with harsh words. Let the silent man speak, preferably something he will have to refute. The object of the conversation is silent and may wish to throw a few harsh words. As long as he opens his mouth to refute, he will easily fall into your trap and finally speak his true thoughts. For example, employees who are not efficient at work in the company and do not follow the orders of their superiors can say something rudely: "You must not get along well with your wife." Even a person who is silent will feel that his self-esteem has been hurt and deny it angrily, "How can this happen." Trap, honestly express the dissatisfaction in my heart. Make him unable to refuse; turn the reason for the other person's rejection of you into the reason why you are looking for him. The editor of a magazine is a master at inviting writers to write manuscripts. He is not a person who can speak well. He only said to the writer, "I am too busy to write a manuscript...": "I know you are very busy, and it is because you are busy that I invite you to write a manuscript. , people who are too idle will not have good works." His practice of inviting busy people to write manuscripts has never happened before. Generally speaking, it is quite difficult for a person who has a strong reason to refuse to agree. Because this kind of person is fully prepared, pleadings like "Please help..." will make him annoyed. To deal with this type of person, according to the previous example, it may be effective to praise the other party's reasons and then ask for it. The handiest person to apply this method is a cosmetic salesman. When they meet users for the first time, most housewives will not buy. At this time, the salesman will say: "I know that you don't need cosmetics because of your delicate and tender skin." Few people are not moved by hearing this, and then the salesman adds: "But, summer, The scorching sun..." Saying this, the housewife would happily pay for it.

8. Open the topic of silence. Take the other person's subconscious actions as the topic of opening the silence. Two people who don't like to talk sitting side by side, the scene will be quite embarrassing. Especially for people meeting for the first time, is there a great way to make the conversation go smoothly? Yes, this is to take the other party's subconscious behavior as a topic. If the other party just smokes blindly, you find that he has a certain habit of turning off the match and immediately ask him: "Your action of turning off the match is very interesting, and it goes out with a flick." You can also ask, "I'm sorry, why do you have to put two and a half tablespoons of sugar..." Usually, in the face of this kind of question, the other party will have to speak, and maybe it will also evoke the other party's endless memories.

9. Use more "we" and less "me" when talking. This shows a kind of public psychology, that is, when faced with danger, if several people face it together, the danger will be weaker, and even a sense of security will be created. For example, in Japan, there is a notorious "selling spring sightseeing tour group." The male members of this tour group travel all over Southeast Asia, mainly to visit brothels. Those gentlemen who seem to be honest and kind in Japan, as soon as they join such a group, suddenly become abhorrent. This is also the "collective consciousness" at work; that is, the burden of one thing is diluted on everyone, and the burden on the individual is much lighter, so there is no more guilt. This dilution or risk method works for any occasion. When the unit encounters difficulties or times, if you emphasize everyone's awareness and use more "we" and less "I," it will not only help persuade the other party but also enhance confidence.

10. Don't belittle yourself. Your habitual humility can make you feel like you're a "groaning" person who doesn't want to make progress. Some people like to put themselves down very low, for example: "People like me are just poor salarymen!" Or: "You see, I just don't have it!" Although your starting point is For the sake of humility, if you don't want others to think you're a sullen person, then it's best not to talk about yourself in such a detrimental tone. Of course, it's okay to say this occasionally, but it will become a habitual statement over time. You only need to observe people who like to say this kind of thing; you can find that they often use it. As for the other party's reaction? Maybe I didn't pay much attention to it at first, but if I hear this tone every time I meet, I will gradually feel that it is not interesting to meet such a person. What's more, it creates the idea that it's not modesty; it's really not; this is what psychology's so-called "cumulative suggestion effect" does. If you often say "you really don't have," or "you are stupid," etc., even if it is very normal, over time, you will feel that you are really useless. Just like this, it is one of the characteristics of human nature to think that what is often heard is true. Therefore, devaluing your own statement is not only useless to yourself but also self-defeating, making others think that you are really who you say you are.


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Alexander Miller

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