Are You Compatible with your Partner?
Or How to Determine Compatibility if you are Single...
One of the most important things to consider when selecting a partner is compatibility. The definition of compatibility is “capable of existing together in harmony”. Well duh. That sounds like a no brainer. Of course you would want to exist in harmony with your partner. Otherwise, what's the point???
But how does someone determine if two people will be able to exist together in unity? Well, there are many ways to do this. I want to start by reminding you that the success of any relationship begins with both parties having a willingness to make it work at all costs. It takes a tremendous amount of communication and compromise. It requires patience and loving kindness. I could go on but let's stick to today's topic. Just keep in mind the success of any relationship is not based on just compatibiltiy.
First, astrology can shed some light on this subject. This involves more than just googling "Is Gemini compatible with Aries?" It’s an intricate process revolving around your time and place of birth and that of your partners. Have a reputable Astrologer do your charts and break down what everything means. Trust me, a Leo on the cusp is a very different person than one not born on the cusp. (I'm not an astrologer, just trust me on this.)
While having a compatibility astrology reading can be eye opening, there is no real guarantee that the two of you will live happily ever after. But what if you don’t have a reputable astrologer on speed dial or you don't want to shell out the funds for such nonsense? (But there's something to astrology, don't completely dismiss it). You can decide this for yourself by looking at these factors:
1. Mutual Friends
You’ve heard the saying: “your vibe attracts your tribe”. Your current vibration is what draws other people to you that have similar vibrations. So, if you have mutual friends, that could mean that you are both on the same energetic wavelength and quite possibly are compatible.
There's also a greater chance of you meeting your soulmate if you happen to run in the same circles. And let's not discount that since you have mutual friends, you probably also have similar lifestlyes.
This is by far the greatest indication of compatabitblity. The best guys I've dated have been set ups. Hey...I think you two would really get along and, they were right!
2. Similar Interests
While it’s not healthy to spend every waking moment with your partner, you should have at least a few similar interests. Choose a partner that enjoys some of the same things you enjoy. If you love to travel but your spouse doesn’t, you’ll most likely be going alone or not at all. If your spouse loves the outdoors but you hate it, well, that's not a good sign. If camping is not your favorite thing but you're down for it occasionally, now we're getting somewhere! Imagine getting married and then always being alone and not with your partner. Divorce, anyone? Save yourself the grief and don't marry them in the first place.
I think it's safe to say that if you have no similiar interests then you're definitely not compatible...
3. Congruent Values
You and your mate should have values that compliment one another. In order to build a life together you must agree on things such as religion, money, and how to raise children.
If you value honesty and loyalty, then you will look for that in a partner. If eating healthy and exercising is a priority for you, then why would you date an unhealthy dude in the first place? For validation? So you won't be single?? Girl, just becasue you're single doesn't mean anything is wrong with you! It means that you respect and love yourself and are waiting for the right man to come along. (Um-hello- I'm single! I'll be posting my birth chart down below for any friends that want to set me up. Jk)
Stay true to your values and decide before you start dating what things you can compromise on. Because you know you won't be dating your clone, right? This person is not the same as you and doesn't have to be (Thank God for that!) Similar values yes, exact values (and political views for that matter), NO. We are all unique and he should embrace your uniquness as you will his!
Compatible people balance each other out. While one may be an introvert, the other is an extrovert. Your strengths are your partners’ weaknesses and vice versa. Let's say you love to talk and your partner is more on the quiet side. Imagine two people in a relationship that both want to dominate the conversation? Oy. (Don't laugh- I know a couple like that).
One caveat about this quality though is that if you are both too far on opposite spectrums then it could be a problem down the road. For example let’s say you are very social and your significant other is not. You may have to attend social events without them or they may have to be more social to accommodate you.
5. Understand Your Partner’s Love Language
This one is huge. Your love language is how you express your love. There are 5 disticnt love langages. There are:
- words of affirmation
- gifts to show appreciation
- quality time with their partner
- acts of service
- physical touch
If you're curious to know more about this, I highly recommend the book The Five Love Languages by Gary Chapman.
While the two of you do not have to speak the same love language, you should at the very least know what your partners love language is and be able to understand it.
6. Respect Each Other’s Differences
While compatibility is crucial to the success of a relationship, there are no two humans that are exactly the same. We are all here for a different purpose and are all on our own path. The best, most loving relationships are were both parties respect each others differences!
But I dare say, just taking that leap of faith, asking the person out, and having some heart to heart conversations IRL is truly the only way to know if you're compatible. You can stalk their social media and read their horoscope all day long but you can never really know someone unless you put in the effort. Life is soooo short and you don't want to look back with regrets and thinking what if...SO WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR?
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