A Frozen State

You wake to a siren. Something small that passes by. You turn to your side to reach for your phone. Your alarm rings and it’s still early. Early enough to roll over and steal some time for rest. Your mind races as your thoughts begin to manifest. Morning thoughts and memory cloud the brain. Reminders of what is today and what is happening. Work, school or just another day to venture off an exploration.

You smell the cool breeze of fresh air coming from outside. The news providing good things for the weather. You move around to wake the body and you mentally prepare for a routine that has been off for a while. In hopes for a success you scatter around as if to prepare for a video call but really you are just excited for what might be a highlight of the day.

Time passes & what starts the day is what is always left. You, yourself are the only one thats there. You wake up to yourself, comforters and all. Sheets of black fades into isolation as you move on throughout the day. Head held high or a mind down low, A day repeats itself with routines & lifestyles. Surrounded by things that remains the same. Like a time loop that doesn’t change or only alters to revert back to its circle that it once came from.

Staring at a cup of water, stirring the straw. Admiring the beauty of water and how pure it is. The innocence thats easily polluted by others. Something so healthy, to be manipulated & taken advantage of by others. Neglected of its decency, It only becomes a fragment of what it once was. Water only being needed in last resort moments. Like water you start out so pure and innocent, only to be molded by the waves of society & sheltered by morals. To be conformed to be thicker than water & be more like liquid metal or blood. To be able to handle the weight of the world on your shoulders while pursuing your own ventures.

Existing for self gratification and knowledge, You take refuge in something mundane only to build foundation for years to come. While most break their mold, you find comfort on whats laid out in front of you. Melding the bonds that hold you down. Building structures to where you forget your purpose, you’re reason for existing. You become complacent and start to think you exist for others. To find gratitude & peace within others. Thus, abandoning what led you here in the first place. Unable to move forward due to the amount people that you have affected and has cemented your place here.

You go through periods of change and experiences that makes you better. But you realize it will soon be time to move on. Time will come where you leave a sweet goodbye to those whom you’ve effected greatly. The seasons where you all grew together and bonds were made. People came in and out of your life, for the good and the bad. You grown out of your shell and broke down boundaries that you have made for your own protection.

The shelter that you have made for yourself has been opened to people that you have confided in. Those you have deemed worthy of your trust. They have been given a key to the world of you that no one has access to. Your fears and anxieties has been honored and put to bed with techniques you could only learn and comprehend through mastery of the arts. What holds you back becomes not just yourself but the ties that will break when you do venture on the world outside the frozen state that you have come to cultivate.