Humans logo

3 Situations When You Have to Ignore Other People

Buddhist Examples

By Keith CliffordPublished 2 years ago 3 min read
Like
3 Situations When You Have to Ignore Other People
Photo by Jan Kopřiva on Unsplash

Relationships with other people bring us happiness and satisfaction, but they are often a source of pain and disappointment.

For this reason, to find the key to happiness, you must learn to ignore certain words, attitudes, and behaviors of other people.

Moreover, there are times when ignorance is a mental health issue because our attitude toward what is happening prevents us from moving forward and reaching our true potential.

Realizing that we sometimes harbor toxic relationships, becoming the main victim, is the first step toward freeing ourselves from the trap into which we fall.

Ignorance is an art

According to legend, a man once approached the Buddha and, without saying a word, spat in his face. The Buddha's disciples were upset.

Ananda - one of the most devoted disciples addressed the Buddha:

"Let me do what I deserve."

Buddha calmly wiped his face and Ananda replied:

No, I'll talk to him.

Respectfully straightening his hands, he said to the man:

"Thanks. With your gesture, you let me make sure that my anger has left me. I am infinitely grateful to you. Your gesture showed that Ananda and the other students are still upset. We are thankful. "

The man could not believe what he heard, he was moved and repented of his deed.

This story is a good example of what it means to ignore. Indeed, our vocabulary often has a negative meaning and we feel guilty for ignoring someone.

Ignoring means not letting other people's words, attitudes, and behavior upset our inner balance. You must not resort to cruelty or aggression, but create a protective cocoon around you.

This means ignoring certain people at certain times, but not necessarily avoiding them. Ignoring is not a form of revenge and is not a way to cause complexes in someone, but a way to protect yourself.

3 situations in which you have to learn to ignore

1. Destructive criticism

If the criticism doesn't help you get better, it just disappoints you and humiliates you, you have to ignore it. Don't let others judge you if they haven't put you in their place. Don't let their criticism hurt you.

2. Negative actions

If a person does bad things to you, do not allow his behavior to change your psychological balance, because he will make sure that he has achieved his goal.

Remember that you can only offend someone who allows you to do this. If you notice inappropriate behavior, check your expectations of the person and move on.

3. Manipulation

Some people try to control us through emotional manipulation. Observe them promptly and try to avoid comments that may increase your feelings of guilt and responsibility for what you did not do. By learning to ignore their words, you can truly take any step in your life.

Create a protective shield

We are accustomed to reacting angrily to aggressive behavior or being upset when we are criticized. Such a reaction is normal and not all of us can behave like a Buddha in a parable.

The problem arises when such a reaction takes longer than necessary and causes us suffering.

To learn to ignore, we need careful preparation and a profound change in our attitude. Although this may seem contradictory, ignoring it does not mean shutting yourself off from others, but on the contrary, you need to be completely open to the world.

In psychology, there is a powerful technique called "radical acceptance."

This means full acceptance without judging all the details. In practice, much of what others tell us hurts because it doesn't live up to our expectations.

We refuse to accept the words or behavior of others. Such denial generates disappointment, resentment, hatred, and sadness.

When you use "radical acceptance", you simply accept what happened without trying to assess the events. Such a psychological distance creates a protective shield around you and develops the ability to respond to a situation without destroying you emotionally.

advice
Like

About the Creator

Reader insights

Be the first to share your insights about this piece.

How does it work?

Add your insights

Comments

There are no comments for this story

Be the first to respond and start the conversation.

Sign in to comment

    Find us on social media

    Miscellaneous links

    • Explore
    • Contact
    • Privacy Policy
    • Terms of Use
    • Support

    © 2024 Creatd, Inc. All Rights Reserved.