11 Signs Your Emotionally Unavailable Partner Is Playing You

Your instinct is telling you something is wrong. Your partner hasn't been calling you as much lately, your texts go unanswered for days on end, and when you both do speak, you're given excuses as to why you both can't hang out. Everything was going well until you found yourself noticing weird behavior. And now you're questioning what you could've said, or done, to be held at arm's length.

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Here are signs to consider in order to determine if you're being played:

1. Avoids the Topic of Commitment

So you think the time has come for a serious step to be taken, but your partner clearly doesn't want to discuss such. Whether their eyes roll or their manner is dismissive, there is an intolerance in response to your suggestion to make the relationship official. If your partner tells you upfront that the relationship won't progress, then you'll know where such stands.

The ball will be in your court to either stay or bid a farewell. And if you think the situation will change, think again.

2. Isn't Concerned About Your Well-Being

Your feelings should be important. Whether you're angry or elated, if your partner doesn't show an interest, you're viewed as irrelevant. There is simply no empathy for you. How your day sufficed, whether positive or negative, means absolutely nothing. Honestly, you're better off not asking about a lack of initiative.

3. Mentions Desired Qualities in a Partner

One indication that you aren't viewed as long-term: Your partner passively mentions the desires of someone to spend the rest of their life with.

You're supposed to be the apple of their eye, but there are no qualms about disregarding you. You aren't one-of-a-kind nor are you worth chasing. Most likely, you're simply a placeholder until your partner crosses paths with someone who is considered ideal in their eyes.

4. Won't Bring You Around Close Friends

Not only do they not know your name, they also don't know you exist. Your partner hangs around them often yet you still haven't been introduced. You aren't important enough to be included in the circle. And most likely, the reason isn't because there is a fear one of the friends will try to get involved with you, but more so because your partner isn't comfortable having you tag along.

5. Doesn't Acknowledge You on Social Media

You're nowhere to be found in any photo albums nor is there any interaction. Not even occasionally. The relationship status isn't displayed at all which bares mystery. Whether your partner does or doesn't have someone is left to be determined by those who are on the outside looking in.

Not to imply the relationship should be blasted from the mountain tops, but your partner could at least make it known you're in their life. Privacy is one thing, but to not mention you at all is shady on their part.

6. Has a Wandering Eye

You should be the only focus of attraction and it should be exclusively for you. Why should your partner be interested in anyone other than you? Because you lack the appeal (according to their view) which would keep the attention fixated on you.

7. Doesn't Mention You in Future Plans

So you listen to your partner voice a desire to be on a higher level at a certain point in their life. But in no way, shape, or form do you hear an inclusion of you in plans which are made. There is definitely an interest in sharing their accomplishments and achievements with someone, but that someone isn't you.

8. Doesn't Defend You When Necessary

Although your partner doesn't have to be a superhero, nor save the day by fighting off the evil, a form of protection in your honor would be nice. To leave you to fend for yourself would be inconsiderate. To fan off any disrespect should speak volumes to you in terms of their unwillingness to go into defense mode.

Your partner would rather you risk the unwarranted offenses of others than to muster up the strength to stand up for you.

9. Takes a Long time to Respond to Your Calls

By 'sweet time' I mean you don't receive a callback until one week later for example. Or perhaps longer. That is absolutely absurd and unless your partner is held hostage, without their phone, regularly (which is highly unlikely), or vacations in outer space (ultimately unlikely), then there isn't a rational reason.

10. Displays Affection Only When Wanting to Have Sex

Suddenly, there is a gleam in your partner's eye when speaking to you. Their manner is sensual and seductive. The tone of their voice is soft-spoken and silky. Yet any other time simply engaging in a casual conversation with you is a tedious chore which is done to keep you quiet. Plainly, you matter only when your partner is aroused and wants to use you as an outlet.

11. Barely Initiates Contact

50/50 would be great, but your partner clearly doesn't know the meaning and isn't invested in communicating with you. Otherwise, you would be contacted as often as you initiate contact.

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If your partner does eventually settle down, you won't be the one. And if you're wondering why you can't be the one to change their stance, such isn't for you to understand nor solve. So cut the cord and move on now. You could make room for someone who will cherish you; rather than waste your time while knowing you would left behind in a heartbeat.