Too Late for Love

Sometimes love doesn’t come when we think it should. The knight in shining armor isn’t going to save us when we need him the most. Sometimes he doesn’t come at all. Sometimes when he shows up we don’t recognize him, and then we lose the opportunity of a lifetime. Sometimes life and living just gets in the way. And sometimes… it is death that brings us together.

I was recently contacted by a friend about activity that has been a cause of some concern for her and her husband. Abby sent me a text message asking for some advice about what to do. I could tell she was pretty upset and asked if she wanted to come over to talk that evening after work. She offered to bring cake—how could I say no to that?!

When Abby got to my house, I could tell I was in for an interesting evening. She reported that her husband, Brian, saw a light in the bedroom two days prior.

“What kind of light?” I asked.

“Like the light from a passing car, only we don’t get that kind of light in our room,” she reported.

Ok, that seems out of the ordinary, but nothing scary. “So what else is going on?”

Abby then told me about a presence in the room right after Brian saw the light. She said it leaned on the bed by her foot. She thought it was a cat, but when she looked, nothing was there.

This house has always had activity in it, ever since Abby and Brian moved in at the passing of her aunt. Her aunt seems to hang around, making sure people are behaving. She causes a bit of chaos with lights going on and off when Abby becomes negative about her mother (her aunt was always close to her mother). She also makes herself known in the bathroom, which Abby says is a bit disturbing. We agreed it may be residual haunting as the shower is now located where her aunt’s vanity used to be. A residual haunting is one where the spirit doesn’t interact, just goes through the same motions as they did when living… such as the aunt waking up and going to the sink every morning.

Another Medium

Abby, I realized as we talked, is a medium and an empath. When she was a young child, staying with her grandparents in their home full of antiques (they run an antique store), she distinctly remembers one night when they had brought a table from the house of a woman who had just passed tragically in an accident. That night Abby was awoken by the cries of that same woman in her room! She threw the covers over her head, trying to pretend it wasn’t real. But then she heard the cries again. She bolted out of the room, down the hall, and slept on the floor of her grandparent’s bedroom. Her grandfather ended up stepping on her in the morning. Abby refused to stay with them for many years because she had been frightened so badly.

Abby now works for her grandparents. She deals with objects coming in with energy on them all the time. She often works with the spirits whom are attached to those items. Whether beds or jewelry, people become attached to items in their lives and often stay with them when they pass. Abby will often find herself sticking with these haunted items, helping those who are attached to let go and move on. She said often she will have long conversations, just letting them know they aren’t alone. I don’t know many mediums, but to hear another medium who cares for the spirits as much as I do was really uplifting. Helping those who are struggling, alive or dead, is very important to me.

Abby was pretty taken aback when I called her a psychic, not feeling she ever had abilities out of the ordinary. But she is special. She is also a very strong empath. She can feel when her sister is upset, even when they aren’t in the same room. She doesn’t like physical touch unless she knows the people well. She hugged my children and me when she visited, but she explained not wanting to touch people whom she thought of as “dirty” such as homeless, drug users, drunks, etc.

“You must think I am a terrible person,” she said.

I shook my head. “No, see, those people carry so much pain around—it isn’t that they are gross, it is that you can feel them and those emotions and you physically hurt yourself because of their suffering.”

Activity in the Home

Abby reported waking up every morning between 1 and 2 AM over the last two months. “Did you bring something home from work?” I asked.

“Brian is working on a vehicle at the house we ended up with,” she says.

Must have a spirit attached, I think.

“I made peace with that guy,” she says. Now I am intrigued. Apparently, a man had committed suicide in that car. But she had gotten him to cross, or so she thought. “But, this isn’t why I am here, not really…”

I studied Abby closely. She obviously can handle these things, even if she claims to not understand completely—all mediums are learning all the time—the universe is full of wonders at every turn. Abby, though, seemed really upset. “What’s going on, Abby? How can I help you?” Abby proceeded to tell me a story that has made me hurt on levels I didn’t know I was capable of feeling:

"I met Brian’s cousin, Hunter, briefly one night right before Thanksgiving not last year but the year before. We were at Denny’s and he came up and introduced himself. I had heard about him and his struggles with drugs and I really didn’t want to touch him, but I was polite and shook his hand. I didn’t think anything else about him. Met Hunter’s mom, Brian’s aunt, at Thanksgiving. She reminded me so much of my own mom… we got along great. She was the person I wish my own mother was—my mom struggled with parenting and drugs and just wasn’t there for my sisters and I.

"Hunter went missing a few months later. I became completely unglued. I tell you, Erin, I have never been so upset in my life. I was completely beside myself. I didn’t know what to do. And I really didn’t understand why I was having this reaction. I didn’t want to touch him before, now I didn’t know what I would do without him."

I started to have a suspicion at this point. I also started to see someone walking back and forth in front of my window.

Hunter's History

Hunter was a Navy SEAL. He came back from war a changed man. He and his wife had difficulties navigating the trauma and PTSD he was suffering and split. He didn’t get to see his young daughter as often as he wanted. He lived with his mother and fought a heroin addiction.

He was found a week after he had gone missing in a fashion that made the family skeptical about how he died but it was deemed an accidental suicide by overdose. Abby said she cried more than anyone at the funeral. "How ridiculous is that? Crying so much at the funeral of someone you hardly knew," she asked.

My suspicions grew stronger. And who is outside? I kept looking up. Abby saw me. “It’s probably Hunter. He hasn’t left my side since he died.”

Oh dear. I think I am right. I said, “Hunter, if you are outside, you are allowed to come in. Only Hunter.” Immediately I felt a presence enter my home. In general, I don’t let spirits in uninvited, but people who have crossed over usually don’t need permission. Hunter was very polite and waited to be asked to come in… or he isn’t crossed. I wasn’t sure.

Rumor came out of the jail recently that someone had slipped Hunter a dose that would kill him—on purpose. Hunter was able to confirm this through me. He said that it is ok. “It is ok. I know it isn’t easy. But I couldn’t make it in this world, not at this time. I was hurting just too badly. I am in a much better place now. I am with you and my girl often, and I feel much more effective in your life from where I am than I ever would have been able to in your world.”

This comment made me think that he is completely crossed… and caused me to think that yes, unfortunately, I may be right. I looked at Abby, gave her a reassuring smile—or at least tried to—and dropped the bomb. “I think you are soulmates.”

Abby broke down in tears. “That is what I was afraid of,” she says. “I love this man. I don’t know him, but I love him and can’t stand being without him. How do I reconcile this with my husband? What does it mean for the future?”

I am afraid I don’t have the answers for this. How terrible to find your soulmate and realize who he is after he has passed away. How can you stay married and be in love with someone else? The truth of the matter is that a soulmate relationship isn’t always a romantic one. Our soulmates can be friends, children, parents, siblings. They can be someone we never even get a chance to meet. I gave the best advice I could, “Ask him. Ask him before going to sleep tonight to talk to you about what this means for you and for him. Ask him what your relationship will become from now on out.”

What does the future hold?

The question of the strange activity in the house had not yet been completely addressed, and as we knew Hunter was hovering around Abby at my couch, our attention turned to the windows behind us in my living room where Abby saw movement, and I heard a voice. “That isn’t Hunter,” I said.

Abby was getting visibly uncomfortable. “I forgot to mention that Jessica (her daughter) saw a monster in her room the other night.” It was at this moment that the entity outside launched through the wall and into the room. The heaviness was palpable.

We both yelled out “The man in the truck!” and Abby sprinted for the front door.

I said, “Go on outside. I got this!”

This is my normal realm of work when it comes to mediumship. I needed to get this spirit to cross. He wasn’t following my rules—such as do not enter my home without asking permission. He was the one moving objects, touching the bed, and scaring little Jessica. He had to go. I did what I always do in this situation—I called my guides and angels, and even though it was a struggle, I got this spirit to cross over. As soon as I did, Abby must have sensed it because she came in right then stating it was ok to come inside now. “Yes, it is, “ I said to her.

This solved the problem of the unwanted activity in her home, but Abby has a long road ahead of her. How does she reconcile these emotions of being in love with a person who is crossed? How does she set it right in her mind about being married to someone that isn’t her soul mate? What does Abby and Hunter’s relationship look like now? My heart hurts for them.