I've never given much thought to astrology or zodiac signs. I am who I am and I don't care who I am most compatible with or what moon is in my house. I didn't care what my daily horoscope said. I woke up in the morning, put on my pants one leg at a time, and started my day.
That all changed on July 31, 2011. I felt like I had hit rock bottom. In my career, love life, everything. I needed a change.
According to the LA TIMES, my horoscope read "you are likely to misjudge your own capabilities, underestimating your strength and stamina. When you feel depleted, push through. You'll get a second wind."
Now what does THAT mean? On the evening of July 31, 2011, my 4-year daughter and I were in a wrenching car accident. My car flipped over and spun, we landed on the roof and the worst feeling was knowing that I had to save myself before I could help my daughter. Miraculously, she was not injured, but I sustained a back injury and a number of herniated dics in my back and my neck.
But a nurse pulled me from the car. She said, "Take my hand. I'm a nurse."
That line was life changing. This was in 2011. I started taking classes to become a nurse in 2012 and I graduated with my BSN in May 2015. So many times I wanted to quit. So many times I thought that I couldn't do this or handle that. So many times my chronic pain threatened to weigh me down and force me to change my career path. But I pushed through. I met my husband in nursing school and he acted as my second wind. He helped me to finish school.
I married my husband in 2016. We welcomed our son in 2020 and the four of us live happily together.
What does this have to do with zodiac signs? Well, I am a Cancer. I was born on June 27. Cancers are emotional, moody, homebodies, loyal and fierce in relationships, protective, and vindictive.
I am all of these things. For me to study to become a nurse required me to leave my house, try new things, and grow a tough outer shell. I needed to really check my emotions at the door and stay focused. I needed to examine who I am. I will combine the first three traits: emotional, moody and homebodies.
I can go from over-the-moon happy to shut-down-don’t-talk-to-me, literally in the same sentence. This also goes hand-in-hand with being emotional. For example, I can be having the time of my life, but one person can say something negative and my mood will be ruined. I cannot just smile and nod. I will brood on it for days. It seeps into my very existence. The negativity becomes a part of who I am and I cannot turn it off. On the same note, I can be very happy and energetic. My smile and laugh is infectious and I can light up a room as long as that room is in my house. I’m generally an introvert who loves to be at home. I do not like to go out. I do not like to travel. I am most happy burrowing in my bed or on my couch. If I do make plans to go out, I usually cancel them or dread attending whatever it is I agreed to the entire day. It’s not that I don’t like to see friends or get out of the house once in a while it’s just in my nature as a crab to want to stay home.
The next trait that I can identify with is that Cancers are loyal and fierce. Any time I was in a relationship, I was extremely loyal and faithful. I would not even look at another man or flirt with anyone. If I did, I felt instant guilt and had to confess how I was feeling to my partner. For example, I dreamt of a coworker in a certain way and upon waking, I felt sick to my stomach. I dreaded telling my husband all day about my dream, but felt I needed to in order to remain open and honest. I would never, in my conscious life, do anything to hurt him. I am over generous to my family and friends with gifts, money and time. I am there for anyone that needs me. I can listen, give advice and go to bat. I am yours for life and I expect the same in return. If anyone is to cross me or my family, the crab claws come out.
I am extremely overprotective of anyone I am close with, especially my husband and my children. Anyone who dares to hurt feelings must deal with me. It’s to the point where I try to protect them from other family members as well. My husband works night shift. If someone, family included, dares to call him on his cell and it wakes him up, I immediately start chewing out the offending party. If it is not a family member, but a junk call, I’ll chew my husband out for leaving his phone on sound. Do I sound crazy? Of course, but I am only trying to protect his sleep so he can be awake for his shift.
My husband means the world to me, but my children are my universe. My identity comes from being their mother. I have a 13 year old daughter and a 6 month old son. My daughter is from a previous relationship. I am extremely overprotective of her. I feel like if she is not with me, then she is not okay. No one else can care for her as I do. Is that just a mother’s worry? Yes, but I even try to protect her from her father. Anyone who ever tries to bring down the spirit of my daughter will feel the pinch of my claws. I am much worse than a mama bear, I am a mama crab.
This brings me to the last trait of the crab: vindictiveness. If you look in the dictionary under vindictive, there I am. This goes hand in hand with my need to protect my loved ones. Hurt them and my claws come out. I will make your life miserable. For example, my daughter’s father said some choice words to me one day during drop off. In summary he said I was a terrible mom and that my daughter has nothing at my house. Excuse me, but she has her school, her friends, her dog, HER OWN ROOM, food on the table, clothes on her back and all the art supplies a girl could ever want. But most importantly, she has me, her mother. He said these things to me in front of my daughter. We were both crying. I was angry crying, but once the crying stopped, game over. I contacted a lawyer the next day and he paid the price. He was not paying child support; he was not even paying me for half of her activities or doctor’s appointments. I did not ask for much from him, so to call me out and tell lies about me in front of my daughter was my breaking point. Not only am I going to do everything I can to protect my daughter, but now I am going to get even. Didn’t want to pay child support? Guess what, now he is mandated. Didn’t want to be responsible for any transportation for your child? Guess what, now he is mandated. Want to play games with me, but then attack? I’ll attack back, fiercer and stronger.
After, examining my life and my personality traits, I am 100% a cancer crab. I am moody, emotional, loyal, fierce, protective and definitely vindictive. My emotional status depends on the people around me. Are they happy? I am too! Are they upset? So am I! My emotions are a roller coaster. It is also partly because I am a woman, but even worse being a woman crab. My feelings are magnified ten-fold. My emotional status changes quickly, but not my feelings for my family. They are mine. I will love them, hold love, and protect them. Mess with them, you mess with the crab. And this crab is most happy, at home, curled up with her husband and children.