My Experience Making Adult Content
I never imagined myself making adult related content, especially on the internet, but there's a first for everything.
If you were to tell my past self that I would be showing off my body for the internet, I would've laughed and thought it was a joke because I never would've thought of doing such a thing; yet here we are. I have only been at this for some months now and it has taken quite a toll on me a few times to the point where I question what my worth is. Receiving unsolicited pictures, messages, comments, and demands on a daily basis tends to change how you view people in general. At first, I did it for the attention and never expected anything major would happen because, well, I'm a male, and not many people particularly want to see a man's privates, but I was genuinely surprised by what happened and how quickly things escalated into something beyond what I was prepared for.
It started off relatively simple; posting a picture somewhere, hoping I would get some appreciation and maybe a confidence boost, but that's where the trouble ultimately began. The amount of attention that a single picture received was not something I was expecting at all. I was almost immediately flooded with messages and comments of compliments and even praise from a few people, which at the time, really boosted my confidence and made me want more of that. I was really looking for any type of positive response I could find whether it was about my posts or my body, so having multiple people talk about how much they enjoyed my posts helped filled that void in a way; even if it might not have been the most healthy option. After about a month or so, I started noticing that my fan base was really starting to grow and more people were catching wind of me. This is where things took a pretty bad turn.
With the increasing number of people following me and viewing my content, the number of messages and other things increased as well. Multiple messages a day from men and women explaining what they'd do to me sexually or what they'd want me to do to them, constantly asking for pictures and videos, asking for my location to meet up and have 'fun,' wanting me to do certain acts, etc. It started off as a little fun but turned into me feeling like an object to fill other's sexual desires. It felt like no one really cared about me or the fact that I was a person with feelings, but only saw me as a well endowed person to play around with when they're in the mood. As easy as it is to ignore that part though, the thought still comes from time to time.
However, I have talked to some genuine people who do see me more than a sexual object and have gotten to know me on a more personal level which does make things feel worth it sometimes. Yes, talking to people casually as if they didn't just see my nudes is kind of awkward in a sense, but it's not as awkward as one might think. They make me realize that there are people out there who actually want to get to know you and not want something from you. Those types of people, especially in this type of business, are truly important to have around and socialize with. On occasion you may or may not get comments from them as well, but it's more complementary than flirting or sexualizing (at least in my case).
So far I've gained a combined total of at least 280 messages (including pictures), 4,868 likes, 301 comments, and 873 followers within the short months I've been around. Of course this exceeded expectations and caused me to feel extremely overwhelmed fairly quickly to the point where I have completely shut down a few times. As the numbers increase, so does the anxiety and the greater need for anonymity. With everything happening so quickly, it feels as though total control has been lost and you're riding this insane wave until it cools down. Can it be stressful at times? Yes, absolutely. Whether you're not making enough money from your content, being harassed by people on the internet daily, or going through personal problems that prevent you from doing things, it's always a very stressful job because you have to go above and beyond to keep your current fans satisfied while making new fans in the process. Not to mention worrying about people who create fake accounts, scam people, or a platform completely removing your account due to reports. It goes beyond posting a picture or video and swimming in money afterwards; it's a very mentally exhaustive process that can take months or even years to make a decent income off of. I've been doing this for around four months and I haven't even made enough money for a bag of chips yet. I even know a few people who are quitting entirely because of how the internet treats them regardless of how much money they've made from it. Sure the numbers can look good, but looks can be deceiving.
But in all honesty, I can't exactly say that my experience so far has been awful, but I can't say that it's been great either considering I'm fairly new to all of this myself. I've talked to some very cool people who are also in the business, as well as people who genuinely want to know me. I've also had encounters which made me feel uncomfortable and question myself, but like everything, it's a mixture of good and bad things that you just have to deal with. I haven't experienced any horrible things like crazed fans finding my location and stalking me or having to block someone because they're a creep, and I'm thankful for those things not happening to me, but it's still a risk nonetheless because those things have happened to people before. Selling adult content via a private Snapchat, OnlyFans, or being a cam model is a risk in itself because you don't know what kind of people will have access to what you're putting out there. What may be private, might not always stay private. If there's anything I have learned so far from the few months of trying this, it's that you don't owe anyone anything. You don't have to force yourself to do things you are uncomfortable doing because someone will pay you for it. Your mental health, self worth, and safety is more important than any amount of money a person is willing to give.