Sure, I'd love to have that vanilla life again.
I catch myself thinking about holding hands with someone while we go for a stroll, or even while just running menial errands. The soft, steady assurance that they'll always be there. When I'm caught in the undertow of my emotions, they hold me close. They tell me that things will work out. that I will be okay. I fantasize about laying next to each other in bed, tracing my finger along the curves and ridges of their body - finding all of their soft, sensitive little spots that make them twitch, and complain about being softly tickled.
I think about nights when someone gets just as excited as I do to go chase Aurora storms in the dark, inky abyss of a sky painted with stars. I think about someone who will kiss me softly beneath them, and romantic details to embellish the story years later. Nights where the rain or snow is falling hard and steadfast, and we decide to cuddle up on the couch underneath blankets and watch movies or read a book until the storm passes. I want to kiss them in the pouring rain, or dance with them slowly and intimately in front of a fireplace. I want to be able to hug them without worry. I want to belong with this person. They will be the Prince Charming that appears out of nowhere valiantly on their majestic steed to sweep me off my feet, pulling me into a happily ever after. Gods, yes. That would be heavenly.
But we all know that while God is the perfect boyfriend...
Lucifer does that thing with his tongue that I like.
I want to belong to someone in ways I don't quite understand. It's raw and primitive. Bursting with passion, lust and intense carnal desire. I want someone to claim me, dominate me. Make my body theirs. Snake their fingers through my hair and pull, devour the soft spots on my neck that drive me wild. Wrap their hand around my throat and remind me of just who the fuck they are, while I get to smirk back and brat my way out of their grasp. If I'm not listening, I want them to cuff me to the bed. I want them to tease and edge me. I wanna be fucked like I'm the last woman they will ever fuck.
I want someone to collar me, and tell me how I'm theirs - and theirs alone. Tell me how much of a good little kitten I am. Praise me, love me, fuck me. Tie me up like a good little rope bunny. I am their bunny after all. Tie me up in ways that make their heart stop and their cock throb. Weave those intricate designs around my frame. Make me a piece of fuckable art. Hunt me down like I am the prey you seek. Tell me how much of a good girl I am. Get me on my knees and claim what is theirs. Make me belong to them. I'm a little slut for them, and only them. I want them to dress me up only to eat me out like I'm their last meal. Punish me for my bratty whims. Spank me when I'm bad. I want someone to make me theirs and show me exactly who the fuck I belong to.
Touch me. Love me. Fuck me.
I am a being rooted in duality. Give me the Holy King with a mouth so sinful, that even the Devil's ears bleed when he speaks. For I am the angelic Queen with a mind filthier than sin.